How many tries does it take????

[Reboot]

Calling all successful MWOers!!!! How many tries did it take?? I feel like this is getting ridiculous to say that I am trying when I am not even getting up to a week!!!!

[Doggygirl]

How many tries does it take????

I think all of our stories are different. For me, I stopped on the MWO program and made it 60 days on the first try. Then I decided I could drink. (hahahahahaha) After that relapse, I struggled horribly and didn't manage to put more than a few days at a time together for a stretch of 8 months. Then somehow I finally got sick of it and got on the wagon for what will hopefully be the last time. (will be 2 years in May)

IMO the early days will never miraculously get easy. I just finally decided to tough it out. Then it DOES get easier down the road.

Reteacher also struggled for a long time and celebrated her one year anni yesterday. It can be done. You have to want sobriety way more than you want to drink.

DG

[Marshy]

How many tries does it take????

Hi Reboot,

It took me a LOT of attempts even once I was deadly serious about stopping (and a long time before that thinking about it). And I remember how frustrated and discouraged and scared I felt. Would I ever be able to do it?

My strategy was to throw everything I could at it - support groups, medical help, hypnotherapy, exercise, meditation, counselling etc etc etc (a long list!) - until something worked for me.

Don't despair, keep at it. Add lots of tools to your arsenal and, as DG says, it WILL get better.

[Gumby]

How many tries does it take????

Reboot,
Asking myself the same questions, but I am not going to give up. I decided today, I need a plan. It is talked about a lot here and something I haven't actually put any thought into. I will write it down today. I just know if I keep trying I will overcome this addiction. I have to just keep telling myself I can do it. I have found that as soon as I say "the hell with it" that's exactly where I end up...back in hell. I have not been successful in anyway shape or form...but I will keep trying. Plan to read David Carrs book today "The easy way to stop drinking" I have heard many speak of it, and I have made it half way thru about 6 months ago....I need to finish it. This is phase one of my plan, will construct the rest today as well. Good Luck to you today….Strong work on the time you spent AF you can only keep trying;-)

[Gold]

How many tries does it take????

Hi Reboot,

I expect it's different for everyone, but there are many many examples of people who have stopped and therefore it can only be a matter of keeping on until you are one of those too.

When I first found MWO I was so relieved that there were others experiencing the same difficulties as me that the relief in itself was enough to manage three days, and then inexplicably to drink on the fourth! Then 77 days and I hit the experience that many seem to get, that of thinking I could moderate which did not work. after that period I managed 22 days and then drank again, after that I found it more difficult to get back in the swing of being AF, however I did.

The last time (and it IS the last time) I stopped was Christmas Eve, I realised that I would be the only one drinking on Christmas day, it's just me and my two daughters (17 and 20), and what would be the point of it. There wasn't any point in drinking on Christmas day or any other day for that matter, so I stopped on Christmas Eve. And that is how it remains, there is no point at all in drinking, not a single benefit, nothing. I'm much more in the habit of not drinking now after three months and the times before, so it's much easier I don't think about it.

I think that all of the attempts are of value as you learn something each time, and knowing that being AF is so much nicer than drinking helps too. As I stopped at a time most people drink (Christmas) it was a special date I suppose and knowing that 2010 would be AF, both helped.

Doggygirl is right, you have to want to be sober more than to drink. It is a choice, and it's easy to think that the alcohol has power over us but it doesn't if we don't give it that power.

[tlrgs]

How many tries does it take????

the time it takes is all in your hands .. with every try you make bring you alittle closer to learninng alot about you and as soon as you are ready to comitt to the whole picture .. then and only then will you be happy and ready to get where you want in life

[Doggygirl]

How many tries does it take????

Marshy, you raise an awesome point about being willing to try anything to find a plan that works. Gumby - great post about having a plan! What are my tools and how will I use them? What will I do when I have an urge to drink? (we KNOW the urges will come and we MUST have a plan of what we will do other than drink!)

The ONLY way AL has power over me is if I take the first drink. Then I have proven time and again that I have NO control, and will just drink more. I keep the power so long as I REFUSE to drink and do whatever it takes.

DG

[mollyka]

How many tries does it take????

Hi Reboot
What is a 'successful MWOer'? To some it is a day, to some a week, I reckon there is no such thing cos noone knows what'll happen tomorrow. Everyone just plugs along, Doggygirl is very right tho you have to be very aware of needing to live without AL than living with it, keep trying - the right time WILL work if you want it enough.
Molly

[4MyHealth]

How many tries does it take????

Allright...I've been lurking and posting some. I keep telling myself I'll wait to start this plan once my supplements arrive and once the topo arrives. However, after too much wine last night, I feel lousy. I really should start tonight. ...but then the fear creeps in...it is Friday...what will I do if I really want it at 5 and I don't have any?? How can I motivate myself to make it through tonight? tips, anyone??

[Gumby]

How many tries does it take????

4myhealth,

Hi although I am probably not the one to tell you some great advice, I surely feel experienced because... I have failed, over and over again. I mean look at my join date, Im not proud of this but I m back trying again. I know what I am doing wrong, I keep picking up that stupid glass filled with that poison. I'm not sure why I keep doing it. I know the feeling very well, waking up to , first ..not feeling well, then the guilt...then the mind games start. You say well tonight I won't drink, then you worry how will I do that. I dumped the remainder of the wine I had out this morning. I know for tonight I will not drink wine, but I know there is beer in the fridge....arghhh. I am composing a plan....Doggy girl gave me a good tip....I plan for what I will do when I want a drink....so I m thinking on that, maybe you could do the same. Come up with an alternative. Maybe something to keep you busy. I might take my little one to a movie tonight, get me out of the house. Get me out of the situation that just lowers my inhibition. I'm still thinking on it, but wanted you to know.... I know how you feel...all to well. Good Luck for tonight!

[4MyHealth]

How many tries does it take????

Thanks Gumby for the reply! I am just so tired today...I'll pour out the little bit that is left and will not let myself head to the store!! I'll drink tea tonight and try to focus on how good I will feel when I wake up tomorrow morning. (Unlike this a.m. when I chugged a glass of h20 and my 9 year old said "why are you so thirsty?") Good luck to you tonight...enjoy the movie!

[hippie37]

How many tries does it take????

Hi Reboot.

I think for me the 'tries' were all part of the process in getting me to a place of complete surrender. So it will take as many as it takes for YOU to reach that place with YOUR process of fully accepting your drinking for what it really is. I think the 'tries' are as much unimportant as they are important when you allow yourself to see them for what they really are. But you'll only see that I guess in hindsight!!

Cognitively I would tell myself each and every time that things would be different this time around. I'd learned from my last 'lesson' or relapse. But nothing had shifted within me apart from my thinking. I was still portraying the same old behaviours that lead me back into drinking in the first place. So like I said it will take as many as it takes for you to come to some understanding through your own experiences of who you are and how you identify yourself in relation to your problem with drink.

Best of luck to you and the others in this thread who I've read posts from.

Keep the faith and believe in yourselves.

Love and Light
Phil
xx

[jackal36]

How many tries does it take????

Gold;828336 wrote: Hi Reboot,

I expect it's different for everyone, but there are many many examples of people who have stopped and therefore it can only be a matter of keeping on until you are one of those too.

When I first found MWO I was so relieved that there were others experiencing the same difficulties as me that the relief in itself was enough to manage three days, and then inexplicably to drink on the fourth! Then 77 days and I hit the experience that many seem to get, that of thinking I could moderate which did not work. after that period I managed 22 days and then drank again, after that I found it more difficult to get back in the swing of being AF, however I did.

The last time (and it IS the last time) I stopped was Christmas Eve, I realised that I would be the only one drinking on Christmas day, it's just me and my two daughters (17 and 20), and what would be the point of it. There wasn't any point in drinking on Christmas day or any other day for that matter, so I stopped on Christmas Eve. And that is how it remains, there is no point at all in drinking, not a single benefit, nothing. I'm much more in the habit of not drinking now after three months and the times before, so it's much easier I don't think about it.

I think that all of the attempts are of value as you learn something each time, and knowing that being AF is so much nicer than drinking helps too. As I stopped at a time most people drink (Christmas) it was a special date I suppose and knowing that 2010 would be AF, both helped.

Doggygirl is right, you have to want to be sober more than to drink. It is a choice, and it's easy to think that the alcohol has power over us but it doesn't if we don't give it that power.

strange is our situation here on earth...we only visit for a short while not really knowing why...yet seem to have to divine a purpose.......albert einstein also....