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    #1

    It's Day 3!

    Well, I made it through lunch with my dad and stepmom yesterday. They are alkies...She is really good about not drinking during the day, but he always has at least one glass of wine, and I always used to have at least one beer. We went to the local pizza place, which has my favorite beer, and I had diet coke. I felt so much better about myself. The place was kind of loud and chaotic, and my daughter is a terrible, picky eater, and instead of using alcohol to numb all that, I didn't. Getting to the end of the day, and having my husband come home and not trying to hide alcohol breath, or worry if he could tell if I had been drinking, even a little, was so liberating. He kept looking at me, I felt paranoid like he was trying to see if I had been drinking - well, not surprising, considering his past experience with me. I want him to be relaxed coming home, not apprehensive. Again, I just have to remember that this is so much better than any buzz I could get from alcohol.

    I still feel overwhelmed saying things like, "never again," and I haven't made any huge proclamations to anyone, just taking it one day at a time. Tomorrow night we have that dinner party, and I don't want to make a big deal of it...just hoping if I have half a glass of wine it won't set off cravings later on. Actually if I let my glass sit there long enough my husband will probably drink it. This is a different attitude than i used to have...I'd have been counting the hours till I could be "allowed" to drink and it would be acceptable. Hopefully something has changed in my mind. I don't want to say much about it to my husband, because I don't want to talk about how much I was drinking before - just want to prevent it from happening again.

    I had a thought yesterday - you know that saying, "A 1000-mile journey begins with one step"? I think it may have been Lao-Tze, but anyway...I think that can also be true of a bad journey. Like one social glass of wine leading to a pattern of heavy drinking again.

    Well, must run for now...I'm sure there will be more later.
    Tags: None
    #2
    It's Day 3!

    :goodjob: Congratulations!! Sounds like you had a very good day. I am not saying the words 'never again' right now either. That might come later but right now I am focusing on the here & now. Now, I am not drinking.
    "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
    ..........
    AF - 7-27-15

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      #3
      It's Day 3!

      I would maybe just skip the half glass of wine at dinner so that you are not even tempted to drink it, its sad how everyone has made it so hard for people not to drink and still feel social-ably accepted. But it sounds like your on the right path, just keep that natural "high" going and the sky is the limit!

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        #4
        It's Day 3!

        I'm with Busted on this one,skip the half glass of wine. Keep the glass but put something non AL in it. I've got some beautiful long stemmed Gothic style wine glasses and I still use them but fill them with lemonade, with ice and a slice.
        You've come this far and are doing great,it's early days. For me I just couldn't have risked even a sip.
        J x
        :l
        It could be worse, I could be filing.
        AF since 7/7/2009

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          #5
          It's Day 3!

          Someone I really don't think you should risk that 1 glass of wine at all. It's up to you whether or not you have a glass in front of you but having it there you could find yourself picking it up without realising. Here is a trick I learned for restaurants - as soon as you sit down remove the wine glass(es), push them away from your setting or put them on another table or turn them over. Both the last two prevent anyone from pouring a glass right in front of you without asking. Get yourself a soda, glass of water and keep it with you.

          Here is another thought for you - so far you have 4 days AF, if you have even just half a glass tomorrow then at best you are back at day 1 at worst you could set off further cravings.

          Remember you don't HAVE to have a drink. You can just say "I don't fancy wine today thanks".

          Comment

            #6
            It's Day 3!

            Thanks, all I could put some cranberry juice in my glass, or just say something like, it aggravates my allergies, or whatever. It is too bad that it can be so awkward to not drink.

            Anyway...lots of Diet Pepsi seems to help! Although I know water would be better for me.

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              #7
              It's Day 3!

              I agree. Will it be a big deal if you don't have wine? I've been out to dinner with a group and never even noticed who is drinking and who isn't. It's so easy these days to say you are the sober driver, or just that you're sticking to water tonight. It's nobody else's business really. If you're worried order soda or sparkling water. It could be gin or vodka for all anyone knows. :goodjob:

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                #8
                It's Day 3!

                Thanks...this one might be trickier because it is at our house, and it's just snacks and not dinner. But I'll figure something out.

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                  #9
                  It's Day 3!

                  someone,
                  At your home should be so much easier, you are in control!
                  When you finally make the decision, never again.....you can go on with your life not fighting the temptation.
                  Have a great party and have fun!

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                    #10
                    It's Day 3!

                    Well, so far so good on Day 3. Went to the corner store for milk and did not buy beer. Talked to my husband about some things that were frustrating me and didn't have to worry about him saying, "Have you been drinking?"

                    Thanks for all your encouragement...

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                      #11
                      It's Day 3!

                      Well done Someone!
                      Chook

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                        #12
                        It's Day 3!

                        Hi someone else, I am glad you stocked up on milk and not booze. From reading your posts here, it sounds like you truly don't want to drink - but your are scared of the alien world of being sober and how you will be treated by others if you are sober. Is this correct? If so, you are not alone, we all know how you feel. The alien world is not so intimidating after al, just one day at a time. I agree with the great comments above as well. Hang in there,
                        Hill
                        Sober since Feb 7, 2010.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          It's Day 3!

                          Hi Someone, I would be on a bender if I had that half glass of wine, don't know, maybe you can do it? Also like UKB says is half a glass of wine worth going back to Day 1 for? Anyway whatever you decide best of luck.
                          I know what you are saying about your husband looking at you to see if you have been drinking - mine certainly did for quite a while after I quit - I'm not sure but I think he has stopped which is nice.
                          Its hard to proclaim to the world ' I don't drink ', of course the fear is that if we succumb to the monster people will sort of snigger or talk about us. I haven't done the pronouncement generally yet, don't know if I ever will, just in case.
                          Molly
                          Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                          contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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                            #14
                            It's Day 3!

                            Guess it is good to just think of it one day at a time...I'm not feeling very well today so that is a good excuse yes, really, I don't feel like drinking, and I guess I feel weird about it, i don't want to go into it and open a can of worms and say anything about how much i was drinking before. Anyway, of course it would be nice to drink normally, but I know I am not like normal people. It's possible i could handle having one and then go back to abs, now that I am so fed up with the way things have been, but like many say, why risk it?

                            thanks, all...

                            Comment

                              #15
                              It's Day 3!

                              Someone_Else: Congratulations on Day 3. Think how good you are going to feel coming home from your friend's "get together" with not having a drink. Think how good it will feel the next day to wake up not hungover and not having to feel guilt for saying/doing something silly the night before. Drinking isn't all that it is cracked up to be. There is always a serious consequence. Keep us posted.
                              September 23, 2011

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