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    Stuck in a distructive rutt

    :new:
    Hello .... I joined MWO today, and I'd sure appreciate receiving your advice.
    I've been struggling with alcohol for many years ... and I have managed to survive terrible hangovers by taking valium, and I've kept my job by not drinking during the week (when not on vacation).
    On days like today, when I feel the pain of withdrawl, I swear that I'm going to quit; but, as soon as I feel better, later in the week, the denial kicks in - Then I go back to believing that it's impossible for me to socialize without drinking ... i.e. I need the "liquid courage" at social events to strike up a conversation.
    Using straight logic, I can see how insane my thinking and behavior is; but, I keep repeating the cycle over and over.
    I highly value any help that you can give me.

    #2
    Stuck in a distructive rutt

    :welcome:

    Man, can I relate! I was in the same vicious cycle as your are for many years. For a long time, it didn't bother me much, but as I got older, and my kids got older (and wiser) I began to feel so guilty. I got really tired of feeling like crap after I drank, swear I would cut down, and then that same night start right back in again. It seemed like I was drinking more often, and enjoying it less.
    I had a really close call with a near-DUI experience, and decided that was it! It was time to get honest and realize I was not in control. I found the book My Way Out, and thought it would be cool to learn how to moderate my drinking. As time went on (I quit smoking too) I realized I would never, ever be able to drink without wanting a cigarette!
    So my advise: Get honest with yourself. Read the book. Follow the program and make yourself go 30 days without any alcohol. I did that, and 30 turned into 60, then 90 and it's been almost 2 years already! The thought of another hangover keeps me sober, along with all of the friendship and support here.
    _______________
    NF since June 1, 2008
    AF since September 28, 2008
    DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
    _____________
    :wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
    5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
    _______________
    The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:

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      #3
      Stuck in a distructive rutt

      Great advise LVT25!
      September 23, 2011

      Comment


        #4
        Stuck in a distructive rutt

        Hi TorontoGuy,

        Welcome to MWO, this is a good place!

        LVT gave you excellent advice. I would just add that after you read the book you need to make your plan. Look in the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html for good ideas.

        Please feel free to drop in the 'Newbies Nest', lots of people there just getting started as well.
        Wishing you the best on your journey!

        Lav
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

        Comment


          #5
          Stuck in a distructive rutt

          TorontoGuy - been there, done that. I'd drink anything and everything, wake up, go to work feeling like crap and then convince myself by 7 pm that I can handle a couple drinks that night..only to repeat the cycle again. I did this for years. Follow the advice here regarding the tool box and don't forget - a lot of folks here have been down the same road and had the same internal battles. Stay strong and be honest with yourself everytime you start coming up with "reasons" to drink.

          Comment


            #6
            Stuck in a distructive rutt

            Welcome!
            "I've done it. I don't need to drink anymore. I'm free!"-Jason Vale

            Comment


              #7
              Stuck in a distructive rutt

              TorontoGuy;836206 wrote: :new:
              Hello .... I joined MWO today, and I'd sure appreciate receiving your advice.
              I've been struggling with alcohol for many years ... and I have managed to survive terrible hangovers by taking valium, and I've kept my job by not drinking during the week (when not on vacation).
              On days like today, when I feel the pain of withdrawl, I swear that I'm going to quit; but, as soon as I feel better, later in the week, the denial kicks in - Then I go back to believing that it's impossible for me to socialize without drinking ... i.e. I need the "liquid courage" at social events to strike up a conversation.
              Using straight logic, I can see how insane my thinking and behavior is; but, I keep repeating the cycle over and over.
              I highly value any help that you can give me.
              hi toronto guy,remember you ssaid advice,youve found an alternative to treatment,mt work,and mt not,if you catch the addiction in its early stages,maybe you wont have to go thro the pain many of us have,ive drank for 40 years,off and on,didnt have a problem stopping,staying stopped wa s the problem,sounds like youve seen your doctor,vallium is used for depression,but not used with alchohol.and you probably told him youll quit or just didnt tell him or her the hole truth,took me many years to realise it,talking is the key solution,and lerning how to grasp the problem we ,quote we,or i have,with people just like me,whether here,other sites or if your true alchoholic,,AA,my reasoning comes from facts,i beleive 60 miles from you i attended a facility,in guelph,to me that is last resource,after going there,if you dont get it,you never will,it might even take a few times,but it does work,even if you decide modding mt be a solution,i wish you well gyco

              Comment


                #8
                Stuck in a distructive rutt

                Hi Torontoguy, welcome. Boy, does your post ever sound familiar. I had finally convinced myself that I was a functioning alcohol user, and sometimes abuser. I had the same pattern as you, but I would drink during the week after hockey at night midweek, and I would start the weekend on Thursday night etc. Although I did not take any supplements or do any programs, I did (and am still) using the website to help me day by day. I came within an inch of losing my family, my marriage, my license, my job promotion opporunities, etc because of my drinking. For me, moderation does not work. It is scary thining about life being sober, the social and family thiings that will occur, but you can do it. We can help. Hang in there,
                Hill
                Sober since Feb 7, 2010.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Stuck in a distructive rutt

                  Hi TG

                  Yeah your story sounds similar to mine also. Defo read the book - it was like reading extracts from my life. Loved the advice LVT. Thirty days seems so long. I will be happy at the mo with 1 week then to make it two and on I go.

                  Only been here a couple of weeks my self but I know I have found a special place.

                  Good luck xx
                  Success is knowing when to sit back and enjoy the moment

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Stuck in a distructive rutt

                    Well said Sheri, I have nothing to add except:applaud::applaud::applaud:
                    Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                    contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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