Announcement

**Zeppie2** · April 25, 2010, 01:46 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Hi KatieB - don't beat yourself up about your binge, but get back on that horse, learn from your mistakes. Life gets crappy sometimes for everyone but us alkies really need to learn how to deal with those times other ways than drinking ourselves to oblivion.

Anyway keep your chin up and welcome back

**Guest** · April 25, 2010, 02:03 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Hi Katie..there is nothing wrong with you..you need to accept that fact... You are addicted to alcohol....Seems to be a way of dealing with chronic anxiety like me ...its hard..... you are an alcoholic..how do we function without our booze I used to be terrified about going out with freinds for dinner ..needing to have a bottle of wine before even leaving and arguing about the money for a taxi because i couldnt drive .. Alcohol complicates our lives never ending and we end up thinking this is all to hard i need to drink to resolve it and then you wake up with another layer of trouble and toil ...its a cycle of destruction.... I thought i was too smart to be addicted to any thing.... Im a high achieveing corporate so and so .but there is a way out hope begins here ...DONT DRINK!!! simple...if you do you will end up at the same place...broke, anxious, depressed, ashamed..ask your self deep down is it worth it? I think you know the answer...

**JackieClaire** · April 25, 2010, 02:05 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

KatieB,
I'm not going to say don't beat yourself up etc,etc because you're doing that yourself.
You are one very lucky woman to have got home safely after a binge like that.
Darling, it's now time to put a proper plan in place. One that you will stick to. One that includes no booze in any shape or form. Forget about having only one or two drinks.
Write it out now while you're feeling crap.

You have to do this for yourself first and foremost, after that you'll be surprised how things will straighten out.

J x
:l

**KatieB** · April 25, 2010, 02:15 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Thanks guys,

I know I have to stop.. I find I can stop quite easily once I put my mind to it.. i just keep coming up with reasons/excuses to drink! Either anxiety, or stress, or feeling I can handle it again.. but this is my second weekend in a row I have drank to excess.. when I had convinced myself I had changed.. I clearly haven't.. I need to stop now before I end up getting into trouble again, or suicidal again, or before I do any more damage to my liver.. I will write a plan now for what I am going to do to tackle this.. thanks again,
Katie xxx

**mollyka** · April 25, 2010, 03:15 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Hi Katie
You know you have to stop, if for no other reason but after that amount of drink the other night, you were probably putting yourself in danger.
I agree with everything JC says, get the plan and have it ready for next weekend and the next one. Remember how bad you felt after the binge and don't let yourself feel like that again.
Like Reggie says 'DON'T DRINK' problem over!!! I know, I know, if only it were as easy as that - but hell Katie its not easy, not at first, but give yourself 20 -30 days under your belt and truly it becomes soooooo much easier, give yourself the chance to experience that
Molly:l

**Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)** · April 25, 2010, 03:19 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Hi Katie, it is so hard at times to put a lid on this, we do understand. Please just try take it in baby steps, ODAT. We are here for you.

**mario** · April 25, 2010, 03:40 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

hi katie, jump back on this wagon,it has stopped to let you climb aboard again, no problem..day 1 starts now.

**Guest** · April 25, 2010, 03:57 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Kate, Kate, Kate. It happens. It is NOT the end of the earth and is NOT the end of your journey to sobriety. I've done it and I have achieved more sober days each time. The latest was 104. One of these days it will be infinity. But, shit does happen in our lives and until we are of the right mindset, we may turn to our panacea as we know it. I got over a lot of shit, but then, one little thing turned me back from my ultimate goal. You can do it, just learn from the experience and how you felt later. It did help me to write down how I felt when I was feeling the ultimate piece of crap the next day. Not for anyone else - just me. I also wrote down why I drank and what it did for me. Reading back this stuff when you are strong and sober makes me, anyway, question myself before I go out and drink. Hope this long reply helps you.

**spuddleduck** · April 25, 2010, 04:02 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

katieb, you know alcohol will make your anxiety worse. that was a binge i can totally relate to so i know how crap you will be feeling. keep a diary of how you are feeling now. you are lucky to get home.. next time you may not. keep at it girl

**Guest** · April 25, 2010, 04:03 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

PS. Never allow yourself to think you have changed. If you only think it, then you haven't.

**Lelasophia** · April 25, 2010, 04:15 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

I'm just beginning Day #6, no expert on this, but I noticed you returned for the support of MWO. That tells me that you want this. You came back - how great is that! I have been taking Kudzu and it has totally helped me with the physical cravings. The psychological needs linger, but coming here and sharing your story reminds me to stick with my plan. Last night, Saturday night was a bit challenging - so I rented the movie Crazy Heart. I didn't know how helpful that would be - but WOW. It helped me to see the cycle - plus it truly was a great movie. I am sending you good energy - lighting a candle for you in New Hampshire, USA. You made it home safely and that says that you truly are here for a purpose. I am working out a plan to have fun today and be AF. I need to learn how to celebrate my life AF. I've forgotton what made me happy prior to A, so now I need to get to know myself again. Good Luck and Best Wishes.

**runningwind** · April 25, 2010, 05:04 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Katie...that has always been the million dollar question.
It is called insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
All of us suffer from this...until we decide to move in a different direction and don't look back.
Do you have a plan written out?
Are you taking anything for cravings?
Always thinking of you Katie and wishing you the best :l

runningwind

**OverIt2007** · April 25, 2010, 10:14 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Holy Shit Katie, Are you ok today???

It happens to the best of us Katie. We never intend for it to happen, but it does. Alcohol Free is really the only certain way to be sure we do not get dragged under again.

The day after I got my 30 days, the very next day, I got so trashed on my sons birthday. I was like a drinking zombie, I literally could not stop. Dont feel alone.

Im falling back into old patterns as well girl. Lets just resolve to get a grip on it now ok?

Love ya,

Overit

**mama bear** · April 25, 2010, 10:19 AM

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Katie....are you ok?????
Thank Heavens you made it home alright
I repeat everything everyone else said...
AND MAKE SURE YOUR EX DOESN'T FIND OUT ABOUT THIS...................
I love you little sister.....

Welcome Guest to My Way Out Forums.

Announcement

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Fell off the wagon true and proper..

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment