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    I have a date tonight - help!

    Hey all,

    Turns out a guy i've been chatting to for ages on the online dating site wants to go out with me tonight.. he suggested we meet up for drinks first! oh no! what do I do?
    I would like to go out with him as he seems really nice.. but would just like to go for a meal with no AL drinks involved.. what do I tell him? How do I keep myself from resisting since I will be so nervous? do i just cancel? But I do not want to be alone for the rest of my life!! my son won't be little forever.. I just don't know what to do.. thank you
    "It works if you work it, because you are worth it!!!"

    :groupluv:

    #2
    I have a date tonight - help!

    Just order an AF drink and tell him you don't drink. I met my current husband on line. We decided to meet for "coffee", since we were meeting in the morning. Turns out we meet for "coffee", but he drank a diet coke, since he doesn't drink coffee. I didn't think anything about the coffee, probably he won't think anything about the drink.

    We sometimes make the drink out to be more than it is to others.

    Have fun! Just be yourself.

    Winefree

    Comment


      #3
      I have a date tonight - help!

      Katie - I totally agree!! You can meet him & have a wonderful time without having a drink. Have a wonderful time Katie.
      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
      ..........
      AF - 7-27-15

      Comment


        #4
        I have a date tonight - help!

        Thank you Nora and Winefree,

        I think I will give the sober dating a try.. he seems too nice for me to pass.. I just have to keep in mind my goals and remain strong,

        Katie x
        "It works if you work it, because you are worth it!!!"

        :groupluv:

        Comment


          #5
          I have a date tonight - help!

          Go KatieB.

          Definitely present your wonderful self sober this time, and if he doesn't like it what have you lost? I'm picking he won't mind if you don't have an alcohol drink and if he questions you and you don't want to come clean, tell him you're taking a holiday for your liver, or just that you don't drink anymore.

          I hope he turns out to be as nice as he sounds, but if he doesn't remember that it's not your fault. He's probably as nervous as you, and online people can present differently because they don't have to worry about the face to face issues. Enjoy yourself.

          Comment


            #6
            I have a date tonight - help!

            Wise words given Katie. Keep it real and have fun! Hope it goes well. )

            Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible and suddenly you are doing the impossible.


            St. Francis of Assisi

            Comment


              #7
              I have a date tonight - help!

              Winefree;847069 wrote: Just order an AF drink and tell him you don't drink. I met my current husband on line. We decided to meet for "coffee", since we were meeting in the morning. Turns out we meet for "coffee", but he drank a diet coke, since he doesn't drink coffee. I didn't think anything about the coffee, probably he won't think anything about the drink.

              We sometimes make the drink out to be more than it is to others.

              Have fun! Just be yourself.

              Winefree
              RIGHT ON THERE WINEFREE


              :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

              Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
              I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

              This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

              Comment


                #8
                I have a date tonight - help!

                KatieB;847066 wrote: Hey all,

                Turns out a guy i've been chatting to for ages on the online dating site wants to go out with me tonight.. he suggested we meet up for drinks first! oh no! what do I do?
                I would like to go out with him as he seems really nice.. but would just like to go for a meal with no AL drinks involved.. what do I tell him? How do I keep myself from resisting since I will be so nervous? do i just cancel? But I do not want to be alone for the rest of my life!! my son won't be little forever.. I just don't know what to do.. thank you
                Katie, it is Sunday evening. Most normal drinkers dont drink the day before the start of the work week. You dont need to make any excuses or have any justifications.

                Hope you have a nice time
                Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn

                Harriet Beecher Stowe

                Comment


                  #9
                  I have a date tonight - help!

                  Hey. I think honesty at this crucial moment is the best. Be straight up and be honest. Cause you aren't just lyin to him, but you'll be fooling yourself. Enjoy the date.
                  Failure is only failure the moment you give up.
                  AF since 04th May 2010
                  Fell overboard on the 8th July!
                  My worst mistake was thinking that what i did wasn't that bad.
                  :crazymonkey:

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I have a date tonight - help!

                    I just woke up.......how did it go????
                    I love my family more than alcohol.:h
                    Live in the Solution....not the problem

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I have a date tonight - help!

                      Hi Katie.
                      It's 9.30pm your time and I am guessing your date is either still going or over.
                      I hope it went well for you. You deserve some happiness and I hope things are on the change for you. You've given up fags and have been AF for nearly a week (or is it over now?) so you sound like you are getting on top of things.
                      Good luck and lotsa love
                      HC
                      I finally got it!
                      "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think, we become" Buddah

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I have a date tonight - help!

                        Yeah isn't it funny that on most dating sites (well over here anyway) the most common suggestion for a first date is "Go for a few quiet drinks to see how things go". I'd go for coffee and just say you don't want to drink. I do think however that if you do go further you possible will need to tell any potential partner about your drinking/or lack of.

                        So they know they can't be wafting wine at you all the time, get stinky drunk with you and so you aren't wondering if they'll ever find out about your problem.

                        Anyway hope it went well.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          I have a date tonight - help!

                          oh wow that's amazing Katie, Hope all goes well for you, don't worry if he snobs up to your drinking or indeed lack-there-of then he wasn't for you.. but I have a feeling this is the one... do come back and tell us how it went.
                          A gentle hand may lead even an elephant by a hair

                          Comment


                            #14
                            I have a date tonight - help!

                            Great Katie........I wish I had a date ! I think my wife might disapprove though. Ha! Hope you made out alright, I'm sure it's already happen. Tell us about it....nosey little cusses that we are ! ha! IAD
                            ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
                            those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
                            Dr. Seuss

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I have a date tonight - help!

                              Hi Katie I hope your date was a success!! I'm single and will bedating Al free which will be a first for me exciting though!! would be great to know how it went xx

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