Falling Apart

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Good Morning Sk8, Wanna, Patrice!

Hope you all have a good day! I am going to try to as well. Just have to make the best of what we got you know? I think I heard somewhere a saying "As long as your still breathing, there is always hope". Well, I am still breathin, LOL!

Patrice, I just deal with the cards God gave me and do the best I can. I think thats what we all do, just try to do the best we can. Ideally, I did not plan on having a child out of wedlock, I would love to be married with a husband, kids dog and cat! But I am grateful for the blessing God gave me. Thats the way I have always saw it. Im glad I dont have the issues that so many have to face when fighting over the kids, no offense to you guys, but you know what I mean. I know its hard for you guys in the situations your both in. I hope that both of your situations get better and very soon! Your both really good guys, and from what I can tell, the women in your lives are lucky to have you and yes, I said LUCKY.

Ok, off to work. Somebody has to do it, LOL!

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Morning Over! Lucky? Maybe you should tell her that. I think I'm more of a pain in the ass you two are talking about. Today is her birthday too.
Remember its not the cards you've been dealt its how you play them. Took me 36 years to fugure that out.
Have a good day at work Over talk to you later.

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Hey Sk8'er!!

I had a few minutes and I was reading back over a few things I might have missed. In some of your posts, I think you beat the crap out of yourself honestly. Like you said, who honestly wants to be depressed and an alcoholic? Your a victim just as much as she thinks she is. I know you did some really really bad things, so you said, but I hope your at a point where you can forgive yourself from that shit. Your a different person now. You could have stayed in the same shit, but you didnt. You decided to make some huge changes.

I think soon your girlfriend needs to face up to the changes that you have made, the efforts you have put forth and realize that you did it all for her, your son, and so that you all could have a better life. That takes alot of strength and courage. She needs to forgive you and she needs to not wait forever to do it. Sorry just my two cents worth this morning

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Hey Over,
You seem kind of pissed in that post!
Yeah I've forgiven myself awhile ago. Also forgave others that did shit to me in the past. Let my past go in a sense. Like you said I have other problems, Dysthymia, social anxiety. Both of which I'm on meds for. Both of those also contributed to my drinking.

I was mad about the same thing a few weeks ago. But I've accepted she doesn't have the time to sit there and work on her problems like I do. Everyone takes different times to deal with things. Me getting frustrated over that isn't going to help me or the situation. But I know what you mean.

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Hey Sk8,

LOL, not really pissed, I was just thinking. Some people in the world (like me) would love to have somebody who loves them as much as it seems you love your girlfriend. When you love somebody, you forgive them. I know you and her are not married but close enough really. What do the wedding vows say? For better or worse.

Just thinking out loud Sk8. Thats for letting me ramble sometimes on your thread.

Catch you later!

[wannachange]

Falling Apart

Yes overit, my wedding vows say in sickness and in health, I was/am sick and she knows it... maybe she just needs to know I want to get better, which she does now.
Oh skippydeedooda... I agree SK8, stop beating yourself up, you cant change the past but you can change the present and the future, keep working on it.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Don't really think you're rambling. You had some very good points there. Some of the same feelings I have. I do beat myself too much from time to time still.
I'm one of those people too. Id love to have someone love me like I love her. Maybe she wasn't as in love as much as I am. Maybe she is and that complicates things. She has told me that she wishes thisnever happened, she doesn't want this, and if would have just been her we would be back together. But it involved her kids. And she is of the thinking that her kids aren't ready to deal with me. Is this true? I don't know.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Today is still going good. Good mood but I'm a little tired. Been sleeping kinda restlessly past couple of night. Got counsuling tonight. Looking forward to that.
Check in later.

[K9Lover]

Falling Apart

Hi Sk8!
Our moods are on the same schedule. LOL. I'm in a great mood today, yesterday, not so much...etc. HA
I do sleep really good as a rule, but some days I just have the darndest time dragging myself out of bed, too comfy there I guess. But nothing feels as good as getting up hangover free, no matter how tired you still are! I have no idea how I was able to get going all those years with alcohol still in my system. Ugh.
I'm just all over the place with my topics today..sorry
Anyways, hope your day continues to be a good one...it's almost Friday!!!
K9

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Hey K9. Glad things are going good for you too. Just killing time before my session. You know thinking about it I really never suffered from really bad hangovers. I might have just gotten used to them I guess. Of course I did become a strong believer in hair of the dog. Ugh. not the best times of my life. I don't even really like looking back at that now. Its like something I did noww let's forget about it and move on.
Not embarassed or ashamed of it. Just don't really think about it. Guess that's a good thing.

[techie]

Falling Apart

No hangovers? They were my inspiration for stopping. Most mornings I felt like Babe in the movie Marathon Man reeling from the evil Szell. Szell uses his dental instruments for sadistic oral surgery to torture and extract information from Babe. Szell is the essence of evil and disturbingly effective during the torture, repeatedly asking Babe the question: Is it safe?

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Well I had hangovers I just somehow managed to get up and going. Slight headaches until the next drink. I can tell you what I don't miss. I do not miss get out of bed and almost falling over. Staggering around first thing in the morning is not fun. I also don't miss feeling like crap all the time either. Don't miss the smell of spilt beer. Don't miss passing out at 3 in the afternoon on a Sunday. Don't miss throwing up and still continuing drinking. Don't miss eating whatever I could find at 12 at night because I hadn't eaten all day. So see even though I wasn't inccapacitated by hangovers there is a lot I'm glad is out of my life.

[techie]

Falling Apart

Oh yeah it did suck big time didn't it.? After a good binge I could be out of commission two to three days. It would only be a rare occasion that I would drink to relieve the hangover. Well, much brighter, sunnier, and healthier days ahead to look forward to!

[K9Lover]

Falling Apart

There were some days when I couldn't remember getting dressed in the morning because I was still drunk. The whole morning was all just a blur, including dropping my daughter off at school, being at work meetings, etc. Some days at lunch I'd be with my co-workers and I would be praying I wouldn't pass out...I'd be sweating and my heart was racing. I am so thankful those days are over.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

I had days like that when I was younger. Out of commision the whole next day. But as soon as the binge drinking started it was all over for me. The hair of the dog started so I get up and skate the next day. How I did it I'll never know. Can you imagine skating a 12ft deep empty pool hungover and buzzed? I'm glad those days are over too.