Falling Apart

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Um what's going on here? Just kidding doesn't bother me. Trust me Over and K9 your not the only two girls out there that have done things like that. I've personally haven't run into them anywhere...uh that sounded bad. But you know what I mean. I'm sure the majority of girls have at least one story like that. And I've even been dating a few of them when it happened. Hence my trust issues. Anyway I'm trying to cheer you up but doing a really bad job at it si I'll stop.

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Yeah, not sure where we were going with this, lol. I think the main point is that, none of us really like the person we are when we are drinking. We become somebody who does careless and thoughtless things, and by the grace of God, were still here to talk about it.

Im actually in a half way decent good mood today. Im thinking about taking my Antabuse pill tommorrow. Didnt really want to go that route, but it may be the route I go anyways. Or maybe I will just love it. I dont know until I try I suppose. The best part about me taking Antabuse, is that I know I have you all to talk with! Thank Goodness, I may be a bit crazy for a while? Who knows.

So any news from the gf lately Sk8?

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

I know that's what you were getting at. I was just trying to have fun with the situation. Nice to see others being honest with themselves and others. I feel the more I let the truth out the freer I feel. And myself hate goes down too. I'm in a good silly mood myself but I don't like to say that since I seem to jinx myself. Skaters are a superstious bunch.
Well if the meds work I say use em. As you can tell I hate doctors but I'm on meds and its made a world of difference.
No GF news. Not really surprised are you? Sometimes I get the feeling I'm pining over someone who could care less if I was alive or dead. Sad to say but its true. All I really am for her now is financial support for our son. At least that's how she treats me.

[K9Lover]

Falling Apart

Sorry we got off on a tangent SK8!

Overit is so right...we're just glad we survived those days, even though we put ourselves in some dangerous/risky situations. I have some Tijuana stories that make my hair curl just remembering them...so I usually try to just leave that in the past!

Overit, I think you should just take the plunge and pop that Antabuse pill, seems like you're ready And of course I will be here to support you, as I'm a veteran AB popper by now. LOL

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

When Is the last time you saw her face to face? Has it been the three months ago?

Perhaps sometime soon, you can ask her to meet with you. Lay some cards out on the table, so to speak. It could go well or it could go bad, but the part where it could go good could be worth it. Do you think she would agree to meet with you sometime in the near future?

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

I have a couple of Tijuana stories too!! Its that damn tequilla they force you to drink!!

I appreciate all your support K and Sk8. Like I said, I am glad I have you all to talk with regarding these issues. How would we get by on our own? Scary thought.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

About 3 months ago. She wouldn't agree to that at all. 99% of my communications are ignored. And when I call to see when I can get my son she seems annoyed she has to talk to me.
I'm in one of those moods today where I feel good about myself and feel I deserve to be treated better. At least treated like a human and one of your sons father. Not like I'm some piece of shit junkie who is calling you to ask for money for my next fix. You know what I mean. Kinda annoyed by her at the moment. She acts as if her life is so hard now when she spends the majority of her days at the pool with the kids. She thinks I just go to work then live it up at my parents. She's got no idea of the mental hell I've been through and doesn't seem to care at this moment.

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Gosh, thats not good. See, I think I would be the opposite. I think I would want to see you face to face to come to a conclusion as to where do we go next? Shes going to be in your life forever, your her baby Daddy. Your RIGHT, you DO deserve to be treated better than some annoyance in her life. It would be different if you were the exact same guy getting drunk and crazy, but your NOT. Sure hope she gets off her high horse soon and gives you the face to face meeting you deserve.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

I know I need to give her time. Just needed to vent a little. Hey better here then some angry text or email

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Yep, you can vent at us... We dont care. And I can be crazy mental nut case and you guys dont seem to care that much either, thank goodness.

[wannachange]

Falling Apart

Well done SK8 for feeling good today, I feel crap - woke up on the wrong side of the bed. The feeling lasted all day until now, I took a walk to the river over the fields and feel much better now. I am learning

Its been 6 months since my wife spoke to me, still no sign of her ever talking to me or responding even to an email about my son.. ach sorry as I said I am in one of my moods Will pass by tomorrow.

Hope you all have a wonderful day!

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Well I don't know if she's annoyed when I call. Just seems that way to me. Don't really know what's going through her head cause she won't tell me anything. All I know is what she tells my parents. Just seems odd there is nothing. No get out of my life or any well see if we can work it out. Just nothing. I mean she'll write one thing but when I talk to her its different.
It seems she doesn't like talking to me because her wall starts to come down and she realizes she still loves me. So she rather just ignore me and hope those feelings go away.
Strange I know. But when it really comes down to it. Its her loss. I'm becoming a much better person then even I thought possible. If she wants to remember me as the drunken mess I bbecame so be it. Its her choice.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Boy you got me going today Over. Its like a few of you said. There are people out there who would kill to have someone love them like I do her. I'm willing to give her time but I can't put my life on hold forever.

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Hey Wanna! Nice pic! Geesh how come all us alkies have to be so darn good looking? Guess that is our compensation, LOL.


Sorry, Sk8. Didnt mean to get your riled up. Maybe I should keep my mouth shut.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Don't worry didn't get me riled up. That stuffs in the back of my head daily.