Falling Apart

[OverIt2007]

Falling Apart

Hey Sk8. Just heading to bed myself in a few. Had some bad news today when I picked up my son... Grrrrrr. Seems he was showing some other kids his peepee and laying on top of some kids. Oh Lord. Well, I just googled up some info and says kids do some crazy stuff and its kinda normal I guess! Not gonna freak over it just yet, LOL.

Doing Ok Sk8. Kinda feeling like a "dry drunk" at the moment, and I totally understand how you also have to work on your sobriety. I have not been doing much "working" on my sobriety. I just know I have taken a pill so my ass cannot drink. Would I be drinking if not on it? Probably! So therefore I need to figure out how to not be just a dry drunk. But I am also enjoying the not drinking part at the moment too, so just one step at a time I guess.

Have a good night and catch you later.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Good morning everyone. Feeling better today. Not so blah. Was in a really good mood last night right before bed. So I'm going to try to keep that going today. I'll check in again when I get to work.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Trying to keep myself in a positive mood today. Just thinking positive things. Negatvity still comes to easy to me. I tend to dwell on the bad not the good. Sucks that I have to actually force myself to think good about myself. Especially since nothings wrong with me.
I'd rather be doing something fun today then work.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Seems so many people here are doing well and keeping positive. Not sure why the positive thing is such a struggle to me. Maybe its the self esteem issue. Today has been alright so far. Been bouncing back and forth between a good mood and that blah mood from yesterday. Got counsuling later so maybe that will sort things out.

Oh I'm now declaring PF Flyer center hi and lo the shoe for skatepunks! Bringing back the old school cause to many people wear Vans nowadays.

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

What is today day 92? Not really keeping count anymore. Being sober is great but at the same time I'm having on hell of a time adjusting to sober living. No I don't want to drink but it seems almost everything revolves around that. Especially in the summer here. I don't mind or care if others drink but the feeling of odd man out to come from time to time. Just wish I knew anyone around where I'm staying. I have all this freedom now but nothing to do. Guess that's how it always is. When you have one you want the other. Welcome to life SK8!
Just killing time waiting for my counsuling session to start. Trust me I'm gonna bring this stuff up.

[one2many]

Falling Apart

Hope the session goes well SK8, let us know xx

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Session went good. Mostly talk about living sober. Gonna start working on my self esteem next week. That should take awhile. 24 years of thinking negative, thinking I'm weird and don't deserve happiness or love. She's got her work cut out for her. I've been catching myself thinking negative about myself and now stop. I don't know why I think like that. You all don't think I'm weird. In fact many of you think the opposite. I'm just comfortable here. You all met me at my lowest. Only good thing about hitting rock bottom is the only way to go is up. LOL. Another thing I know is true now is that I'm not the only one with these issues. To meet me you wouldn't know unless I told you. So once again I'm being my own worst enemy by thinking that everyone can tell. I have to tell myself that from time to time. I guess we all feel like we are the only one with problems and no one could ever understand.

[Pie]

Falling Apart

Hi Sk8,

I haven't read all of your posts, and maybe you've mentioned this, but I wonder if you're taking anti-depressants? Sometimes the negativity and depression spring from a simple chemical deficiency that's easily corrected. Forgive me if you've already covered this ground. Just wondering.

Pie

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Hey Pie, I am on Paxil for the depression and anxiety. Not on a set dosage yet. It just got up'd to 40mg last Thursday. It takes awhile for my body to readjust to the new dosage. I have been feeling slightly better each day this week so hopefully the transition time is almost over.

[Pie]

Falling Apart

Good, Sk8. Hoping the Paxil will do the trick for you . If it doesn't, try another. For me, Prozac improved my life about nine years ago. The other factor that occurs to me is your very young age. There aren't many upsides to getting older, EXCEPT you worry a whole lot less about what other people think. ) At least that's how it's worked for me.

Best,
Pie

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Pie, you might not believe this but I just turned 37 a month ago. Just curious how old you thought I was from the photo? I'm not offended at all trust me. Since I quit drinking I look younger than I did 2 years ago.
Generally I don't care what other people think of me. Since I started dealing with all these issues I feel like everyone knows there is something wrong with me. I know thats not true. Just my mind messing with me again. I guess it misses the booze so its trying to bug me in other ways!LOL

[Pie]

Falling Apart

Well you look more like 27, and I mean that as a compliment. 91 days is magnificent! You must be doing many things right!! You're one of my role models as I start out on this AF journey. Thank you for that.
Pie

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Thank you Pie!! I'll take the compliment. Wish I had a photo of me when I was drinking. Look like two different people to me. Since I've quit I lost 40 pounds, feel healthier, happier, and better in general.
You can do it Pie. Wish I had some words of wisdom for you. But if you want sobrity you can do it. As soon as you accept that you can't drink and you no longer want it, it gets easier. I'm here if you got any questions or just need some support.

[Ringing Cedars]

Falling Apart

Yes sir question coming at you>>>

Just what can I do about this voracious appetite I've developed with menopause??:H:H

I'm scaring myself!!! JK...dropping in to say hi Sk8

[sk8punk]

Falling Apart

Ummmm. I don't have the ability to bleed for seven days and live! LOL.

I swear my thread has the most talk of female parts than any other on this site! I love the freedom in this thread I really do.

Hello RC hope everything is going good with you.