All The Single Ladies

[K9Lover]

This is for all of the single ladies out there...
I'm just wondering how many of us there are? It seems to me there are so many strong, competent, beautiful single women on here.
What experiences (if any) have you had with trying to get back into the dating pool? I haven't even considered it in years, so I need to be schooled on the subject!

[papmom3]

All The Single Ladies

Hey K-9. I think my dating ship has sailed. I've been out of the pool by chance or by choice (not sure which yet) for many years. Along the way I got fat and for some reason decided I was ugly as well and no one could possible be attracted to me. Of course the AL didn't help at all and made my self loathing even worse. I'm still fat but working on it and have decided that I'm not the ugliest thing to see the light of day but at 53 whatever looks I did have, have gone. I signed up for a couple of dating sites over the past couple of years but was really turned off by the men who were supposedly matches for me. Imagine the gall they had to look their age!! I guess I don't want to admit that at my age, any guy in my age range isn't going to look like he's 20 something and that scares me. It's almost like I've been frozen in time. In my mind I'm still young and somewhat pretty and so are the guys.
You however are young and pretty enough to get right back on the horse before it's too late. I know of a number of people who have found the love of their lives through match.com or something similar. Others haven't found Mr. Right yet but are having a ton of fun meeting people and going out on dates.
If you're thinking about this, you must be ready. Good Luck!!

[Quit Quitting]

All The Single Ladies

Hi

I am not single but have done the whole divorced thing and on my 2nd marrriage. I met my 2nd husband at a singles club. A local bar would host them every Sunday evening. Me and a girlfriend started going and met two guys who worked together and both seperated. Sadly my friends did not work out but mine did.

Over here in the UK we have 'Speed Dating' a group of male and females meet up and will spend 5 minutes talking to each other on a 1-2-1 basis. A bell is rung and on to the next one. When everyone has met you score each other and say if you would like to meet up. If you and another have expressed a wish to meet then details can be exchanged. I think that is how it works. Another of my girlfriends met her guy this way and they have been together over 3 years.

If you arrange any blind dates make sure it is someplace open and during the day as your safety is of the utmost importance.

Good luck and looking at your photo I am surpised the guys are not Qing to meet you.

QQ

[wannachange]

All The Single Ladies

Lets keep this thread alive! :H

[Guest]

All The Single Ladies

I'm single but not looking since I know my priority has to be my sobriety right now. Plus for the first time I'm happy being on my own and working even more on that too.

If someone right comes along that will be great but for now I'm just glad to be sober. Besides I've so much to do not sure a man could keep up with me!

[Ringing Cedars]

All The Single Ladies

Single too. All I can say is be careful and don't settle. You deserve a great guy K9. I think it usually takes at least two years for the masks to come down and the real person is revealed. Call me a cynic.

Um, Wanna? What are you doing in this thread?? Oh right, I heard you Wannabeagirl. Carry on.

[daybyday]

All The Single Ladies

Hi K9, Have to say I am in the exact same boat as UKblonde. Been doing the dating thing for over 10 years. This last one of 4 years that was abusive made me realize I have a lot of love to give myself before anyone good can come into my life and love me.
I've never looked or felt better with being off AL. Getting lots of looks and compliments but for now I can only be friends with anyone I meet. Plus it is going to take someone pretty spectacular to have me now! Make sure you are just as picky, you deserve it!! I would rather be alone than settle, my life is too full now.

[daybyday]

All The Single Ladies

P.S. Advise if you are getting back into the dating pool? LISTEN to what your good friends have to say about the men you date and especially listen to your own INNER voice. My best friend warned me from day one about this guy and my inner voice screamed at me for years and I used AL to quiet it down....could have saved myself years of hell.
Have fun too!!

[K9Lover]

All The Single Ladies

Thanks for your replies! Yes, I am very picky and haven't been that interested in even bothering with it. I have been single for 4+ years...and yeah my standards are pretty high. I also wonder if I'm too set in my ways...guess I'd have to learn to be more flexible I was just wondering what experiences other have had!

And no, in case anybody's wondering, I definitely don't need a man....my parents make fun of me for being "too independent".... guess that's a crime these days. :H

My motto is a tweaked version of that one from the movie Jerry Macquire Movie: "I complete me" LOL

[betty boop]

All The Single Ladies

wannachange;874049 wrote: Lets keep this thread alive! :H

Wannachange are your intentions entirely honourable here :H:H

Only joking as I know you're a good guy xx

[lucky 2.0]

All The Single Ladies

Dating.......

Here is what I have figured out. People come together out of need. The 2 most basic needs are to have children or buy a house (financial need) If you want to keep a man around, figure out what need he fits. I currently have only a need for a handyman which is frightening!

[papmom3]

All The Single Ladies

Oh Lucky, you hit the nail on the head!! I way past having children and I own my own house. Many times I've said to myself:"Self, if you want to find a man, make sure he's handy." It is frightening but a little funny to know that's the only important thing now.

[OverIt2007]

All The Single Ladies

Hi Single Ladies!

VERY single lady here. I split with my Ex husband back in 1996 and have not really had a boyfriend since! Sure, I have had what I call "mini" relationships that do not make it past 2 months. The guy gets cold feet and then blows me off. It has happened many times to me.

Its funny, I live in Tampa Bay as you know. The men here seem to be so selfish, its all about them. I grew up in a small town up North and the men there were so different! The type of men up North would open doors for a lady and call their Mom. THe men here just suck! Its all about THEM.

Can you hear me venting, LOL! As far as internet dating, boy I have had my share. I think I have probably racked up at least 100 dates. Some good, alot BAD, but boy these guys do not want to COMMITT to anyone. Then of course there is the weirdo guy who likes me and I cant stand. The search goes on for this girl. And some of you on here might think I am a nice person and a nice girl? I really AM but no guy for this girl.

I hope the future is better for you K-9! Wish I had some better advice or a better outlook on dating, but I just dont.

Also, I agree people get together out of financial need. I admit that is part of why I would want a relationship to have a partner to help each other out. Being a single Mom is really hard to do alone, But if I ever came into a big sum of money, say I won the Lotto or something, Then I highly doubt I would ever want a man around!

[kslc2001]

All The Single Ladies

I'm with UK blond too, (from the UK but live and work in the US). i have a job, and an apartment that I love plus some suppotive friends as I go through this clean up phase of my life. I date, but those I like, don't like me and vice versa. This is MY time, so at the moment I've stopped even looking

[daybyday]

All The Single Ladies

I think there is an amount of time that AA suggests you do not date too when you are first getting sober? Maybe someone more knowledgeable with AA would know.

Although, if Mr. Right :heartsnflowers: happens to come along at the right time....then maybe there'd be an exception....romantic at heart here.