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    #1

    Hiya all

    Hi

    Well I have been here before and was very grateful to a few people especially Jackieclare and Mario who both made me feel stronger and able to face my alcohol abuse... sadly that strength only lasted a nanosecond... cos I was weak and got straight back into it for 6 months but now Im back.. (hope you chip in Mario and Jackie!!!)

    My story is a bit different cos I live in an alcohol free muslim country, but for expats its ok and fairly easy to get . Just call the 'milkman'. Unfortunately the wine is crap and is the same price as vodka or gin, which lasts a bit longer... I still drink the wine but it comes in 1 ltr bottles which I have been consuming nightly for 6 months. My husband left me 7 months ago and my alcohol consumption was mostly to blame. He did actually leave in a strange way.. took our 4 and a half year old son to school, came home and left, never said goodbye to our son, just f...d off. mmm maybe to buy a box of matches...! and we havent seen him since.

    Anyway, he left 2 days after I signed another 1 yr contract.. so I am stuck here another year, dont have any financial problems just alcohol problems which are getting worse by the day. I live in a very humid, hot place so make-up slides off after 3 and half seconds .. not pretty!! i keep thinking its just the humidity but its not.. I'm usually so hung over when I go to work and realise that is why.. I have to be honest. And the time is now I think... its just that I feel very down a lot of the time, my job is difficult, my son is great but often hard work, I have no family or support network here in the Borneo jungle and I'm 47, an older mum so its hard. My father is also sick in NZ so I worry all the time about him... have started taking antidepressants, but of course they are probably not working cos of the booze...

    Its a lonely place here and the wine seems to fill the space until the next day ... when I feel awful... any advice fellow campers?
    :thanks::new:
    Tags: None
    #2
    Hiya all

    Hi patrice. Welcome back. I am here too cause my drinkin was killin my soul and destroyin my life. It's been goin on for 15years or more. And i've been clean since 4th may this year. So i'm still new at it, but one things for sure, this site and the people on it really helped me stay sober. So be proud that you've returned and be proud that you've decided to stop that evil juice. It does nothin but cause more drama and unwanted troubles. Drinkin never solves the problem, the problem is that we only see that when we are sober, while we're drinkin we really believe it's helping suppress all our problems only to wake up feelin 10times worse, 10times more depressed than when we started. We all need to learn to deal with our emotions without alcohol. It's not easy, but it is possible. It's a miracle that i'm sober for over 30days. And i don't ever want to start believin that just one drink won't hurt. Cause it never stops at one does it? For alcoholics, one drink is too many and a thousand is never enough. Hope you stay this time and experience this wonderful life changin journey with us. Hava great day Chilli
    Failure is only failure the moment you give up.
    AF since 04th May 2010
    Fell overboard on the 8th July!
    My worst mistake was thinking that what i did wasn't that bad.
    :crazymonkey:

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      #3
      Hiya all

      Welcome back patrice,
      Of course I remember you, so sorry you're having a rough go of it at the moment.
      The good news is you came back. So keep reading and keep posting.
      J x
      :l
      It could be worse, I could be filing.
      AF since 7/7/2009

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        #4
        Hiya all

        welcome back patrice, wondering were you went to, as jackie has said the main thing is your back,for get what happened before start afresh now today,you know what you have to do, just do it. :-)


        :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

        Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
        I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

        This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

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          #5
          Hiya all

          Hi Patrice we haven't met before but I'm happy you found your way back here. I wish you well and look forward to hearing much more from you.
          Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

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            #6
            Hiya all

            Hi Patrice!
            Sorry for the late welcome, but here goes...:welcome:
            Glad to have you here! Keep posting and reading....I look forward to getting to know you!
            K9
            :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

            Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

            Comment

              #7
              Hiya all

              Patrice - This is a great place to be to start a journey towards freedom from alcohol.
              I just want to warn you about anti depressants and alcohol. Mixing the two can have terrible consequences. After about two months I ended up in a psychiatric unit for a week as it caused a manic reaction. I hadn't had mental health concerns previously, just depression caused by alcohol. Now that I am off of alcohol for five months my mental health is really stable.
              Good luck. It's 100% worth it to quit.

              Comment

                #8
                Hiya all

                Hi Patrice, I'm too new to this journey to give you advice, but just to say 'good on you' for giving it another go...thats huge with all the other challenges you have going on in your life. I am starting day 3 and feeling a bit 'crappy' but just to let you know I'm thinkin of ya and wishing you well
                30 day Challenge...started 16.08.2010

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                  #9
                  Hiya all

                  :welcome:Patrice, it's good to have you back here! Drinking in isolation is a hard one, something I did for many years and not a good sign....It took me 4 years to come up with a plan and then set in motion to get moved where I had more support from family. It has truly made all the difference in my life. I've been AF for 50 days now and no more cravings. Don't even see my family that often but knowing they are right here for me is huge. Also know the great people at MWO are always here for you makes a big difference. You've come back to a great place for support.
                  AF since April 19, 2010
                  NF since Nov 10, 2000

                  "One reason I don't drink is I want to know when I'm having a good time."
                  -Lady Nancy Astor

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Hiya all

                    Hi Patrice,

                    Welcome back, I am new here, looking forward to getting to know you.
                    While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.
                    Benjamin Franklin

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                      #11
                      Hiya all

                      Hi Patrice. Welcome back. You can do this. You are never alone.

                      DG
                      Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                      Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

                      One day at a time.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Hiya all

                        Hi everyone thanks so much for your lovely words and welcomes.. it makes me feel not alone, although it is so difficult going through a relationship breakup in a foreign country far from hime so I don't have the necessary support systems. This is an 'alcohol free' country so there is no medication, AA or anything like that because only the expats here drink. Since my husband left I have been drinking heavily and I guess it has been easy to do that because none of my friends or family can see me!. I am back to day 1 now.. I didnt do day 1 yesterday but I'm positive that I will do it today..I need to for my son and for me. I only have 5 more months left on my contract here and want to go back to NZ feeling and looking fab.. so Day 1, no alcohol in the house!!!

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                          #13
                          Hiya all

                          Hi Patrice - If you need to, log on here everyday when you feel vunerable or craving AL and we'll help you through it. Can you get any of the supplements there like l-glut, kudzu, b-vits, etc.? Give it hell Patrice because you can do this and go back to NZ a new you!!!
                          Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

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                            #14
                            Hiya all

                            Thanks Techie.. I do have some L-Glut but I havent started it yet.. how much should I take? I do have good supplements that I take regularly... I do have cravings and feel vunerable because of the situation here. It's in the tropics and is so hot, going for a walk is out of the question except at 5am but I have to get up then to go to work. At dusk it is cooler but then all the mosquitos are out and its hideous. Basically there is nothing to do here, no music, theatre, there are a couple of expat clubs but everyone brings booze there so I want to try and keep away... the trigger is boredom.
                            I do want to give it hell though thanks

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Hiya all

                              Patrice try 1000mg 3X day and see if that helps the cravings. It does for me but some folks take much higher doses. I think that is a good starting point. See how you feel with that. Let me know and I wish you well. John
                              Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

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