Hi everyone, well I have reached four months of sobriety. I am feeling more at peace with things than I was at the 3 month mark. I have accepted that I don't have to publically disclose my being af. My family members know, and they are very supportive. Most people don't even notice when I offer them beer and quietly have a club soda on the side. I have tackled enough large scale social events to know that I can work through them being sober - hiding the fact that I am not drinking is not really that hard it seems.
My wife and parents are not asking those questions (that personally I didin't want to answer) as muchh - how are, it must be hard... I am amazed at how much less frequent my urges are. In addition, unlike the first few months, now - I (my brain) actually desires other cold beverages after work etc, they are not siimply a default that I have to be stuck with.
The odd large urge comes along - especially on a sunny day, just after building something with the boys outside - they bust out the beers - and it would be great to have one. The only thing, is that I know that I don't want one - I want 12. I am so thankful that I respect the strength of my enemy, and the weakness of my ability to deal with alcohol.
My relationship with my wife is still improving. She no longer has her silver bullet to use whenever she is mad about anything. My drinking is no longer the ace up her sleave. In addition, I am sober any time that she feels the need to argue, and therefore, my side of the argument is calm and better, and the argument does not turn into a fight.
I have not lost weight - the alcohol calories have been replaced with sweets - something I never used to care for. But I don't care right now. I have been lifting weights again, from the start of my journey, and I am feeling good. I am still enjoying my kids much more now that I am sober. It's not that I spend more time with them, its how I appreciate and enjoy the time - time that I will never get back.
I do have to say, for now, I feel much more at peace with things. Thanks to you all for your help and encouragement. Have a great week,
Hill
My wife and parents are not asking those questions (that personally I didin't want to answer) as muchh - how are, it must be hard... I am amazed at how much less frequent my urges are. In addition, unlike the first few months, now - I (my brain) actually desires other cold beverages after work etc, they are not siimply a default that I have to be stuck with.
The odd large urge comes along - especially on a sunny day, just after building something with the boys outside - they bust out the beers - and it would be great to have one. The only thing, is that I know that I don't want one - I want 12. I am so thankful that I respect the strength of my enemy, and the weakness of my ability to deal with alcohol.
My relationship with my wife is still improving. She no longer has her silver bullet to use whenever she is mad about anything. My drinking is no longer the ace up her sleave. In addition, I am sober any time that she feels the need to argue, and therefore, my side of the argument is calm and better, and the argument does not turn into a fight.
I have not lost weight - the alcohol calories have been replaced with sweets - something I never used to care for. But I don't care right now. I have been lifting weights again, from the start of my journey, and I am feeling good. I am still enjoying my kids much more now that I am sober. It's not that I spend more time with them, its how I appreciate and enjoy the time - time that I will never get back.
I do have to say, for now, I feel much more at peace with things. Thanks to you all for your help and encouragement. Have a great week,
Hill
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