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[Lavande]

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Hi jade555 & paguy,

Welcome back to both of you! This is a great place, lots of support available!

I have to say that for me distraction was key in the early days. Making a list of your favorite non-drinking things to do is very helpful. It takes a bit of time & effort to change your thinking but once you do the rest is not so difficult Keep reading & posting frequently, stay close!

I could have named myself pagirl - I'm from PA too - small world. Actually there are several of us around the threads.
If you have any questions please ask & feel free to PM me if you like.

Wishing you both the best on your journey!

Lav

[techie]

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Welcome Jade and Paguy. Best of luck to you both!

[hazeleyes]

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paguy;917141 wrote: This may seem like a crazy analogy but I have taken up running half-marathon races over the past 2 years. And I have to tell you that being surronded by thousands of other runners during a race, who all have the same goal in mind, is a very powerful thing.

So, maybe I should consider my journey to remain AF as just another race that I am running. And, when I get to point where I feel I can't run another step, I'll know that there are thousands of others who are here in this community, and I know where I'll find that strength to continue on the journey.

Love this analogy paguy, I feel strength from others in the same way. Great advice.

[rebirth]

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Yeah very good analogy Paguy. Very thought provoking.

[jade555]

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I'm starting day 5 AF. I'm taking Kudzu, L-Glutamine, general vitamin, and GABA. Since I am not working this week, I've been at the gym 1.5 hours every day. I've avoided cooking although it's probably the only thing I really love to do. I've avoided it because I always drink my chardonnay when I cook. It's the only time I really enjoyed of the whole day. So I decided to go on Weight Watchers anyway this week and work off those 5 pounds my crazy professional life (and chardonnay) had put on me. I'm turning 45 tomorrow.
The one part I am having trouble with is how I can snap so easily and beomce so mean - specially with my 2 little girls. It takes nothing for them to set me off. But that's the case whether I drink or not. I love them more than anything, would die for them! But why am I such a "crabby-paddy"!!! I don't hit them and I bite my tongue before I say bad words, but I do yell and get angry.

Then on the flip side I take them for ice cream, spend too much money sometimes on them, give so much more than many children have.

Maybe I do need to get on anti-depressants as much as I don't want to.

Has anyone else experience consisten bad tempers whether while drinking or not?

[dancelot]

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Hi, Jade - I found it helped to have a glass of something non alcoholic for those times when we "always had a glass of wine in our hand". I replaced mine with flavored sparkling water. To some degree it's a ritual almost - it might sound silly, but it helped. One time I ran out though, and went through a similar anxiety like I had if I ran out of wine. The actual physical act of drinking something is pretty ingrained in a lot of alcoholics - when a group of AA people go to lunch, the server better not ignore our water & iced tea glasses! I also allowed myself to buy any type of overpriced bottled water (I previously never considered paying outrageous amounts for something that comes from the tap) and if i wanted expensive chocolate to go with it, that was OK too. It also helps keep us out of deprivation mode.

Once I got some AF time in, my crankiness was a lot less - not being either drunk or hungover helps a lot. Being sober is a start - even if there are other issues going on that need to be addressed, removing the AL problem and having a clear head will make things clearer as to where to go from there. Best wishes on your journey, and congratulations on 5 days AF! :h

[Doggygirl]

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Hi jade. Very often when depression is an issue for a drinker, it becomes a non-issue with a bit of sobriety under your belt. I too experienced snappiness / moodiness in the early days. I suspect that is pretty common. This is a HUGE adjustment we are putting our bodies and minds through. Unless your doctor thinks otherwise, maybe try to hold off a bit before considering AD's? (but of course I am not a doctor!!) I took the supplements you are taking and found them helpful.

PAguy, welcome to you also. I love the race analogy.

Strength and hope to you both!

DG