Day 1

[Rhiannon]

I am a very heavy drinker and have been so for sometime. My hands are shaky and I can't stop moving and my head feels groggy and racing at the same time. I'm in bad shape. But I have to succeed this time. I had a scare last week at the doctors office and I have a ton of health conerns now all related to the drinking. I'm so so scared to quit, but I must do it or it will kill me. Probably within a year is what the Doctor said. I have three kids and I am divorced and I need to be here for them. Alcoholism runs in my Family. I am not even thinking clearly enough to write this post. But my llife is out of control Can I really quit drinking? The thought is terrifying to me. Sigh..:upset:

[red67]

Day 1

You can do this! Think of your kids and what their life would be without you. You don't want that for them. Use that to start. The people here are VERY helpful and will be there for you if you reach out to them. I read everyday but don't post that often but if you ever need someone to listen please PM me and I will listen and help anyway I can. READ READ READ the posts on all the threads here - it has been such a blessing to me and can really help you. My prayers are with you!:welcome:

[Winefree]

Day 1

Excellent advise from Red. Read the posts. You have been here most likely off and on since 2007, so you should have read the book and know about the supps. If not, now is the time to start. It isn't easy, but we are here for you. It can be done. I first came on here in 2006 and have been AL free since 5/2/2009. It took me a while to get serious too, but I did it and so did some others.
I never thought it possible, but it is!

Winefree

[sunshinedaisies]

Day 1

Hi Rhiannon - welcome back - you took Topa before. How long were you on it? Did it help you at all? If you really are serious about stopping, you know that you need a plan. If your doc said that to you, did he/she give you any other suggestions? What about rehab? If you are a heavy drinker, you will need some help stopping - have you discussed this with your doctor?

In answer to your question, "Can you quit?", yes of course you can - many of us here have. There are so many different tools here and so much help and support but you have to want to do it. It is scary, which is why ODAT is so good. Read the posts - ask questions - go back and talk to your doctor and see what he/she suggests for you. You need to do it for you or you won't be there for your children. Check out the Tools - have you read the book? Maybe re-read it?

If you are really determined, you CAN do this - we will all give you all the support and help that you need. I wish you all the best on your journey.

hugs, sunshinedaisies x

[paguy]

Day 1

Rhiannon:

You CAN do this. Refocus the energy that is overwhelming you with feelings of helplessness and despair to making a commitment to be AF and you will find the strength. Think of your children and where you want to be with them in the future. You cannot be there for them with the bottle in hand.

Today is day 12 for me and that is 12 days longer than I ever thought I'd be AF. MWO is a wonderful community so I urge you to read and reach out. The people here are super.

Be strong and come back here every day.

Peace

[Rhiannon]

Day 1

Thank you. I made it through day one. Yes, I used to take Topa, but it honestly made me dumber than a bag of rocks. The cognitive effects were just too much to bear at my job. Not like alcohol makes me any smarter, but the Topa and I just did not get along. I am interested in busting back out my supplements and possibly ordering some Baclofen. I have been reading some interesting things about it here. Has it worked for anyone here?
As I said, I have been a VERY heavy drinker for years and years.. It seems that every time I have tried to quit before it lasted about two weeks and then I was right back to it. Both my Father and my Brother are alcoholics, but none as heavy as myself. It is so shameful and the cause of all the problems in my life. If only I can get on track. Thank you.

[sunshinedaisies]

Day 1

Rhiannon - it isn't shameful!!!!!! Yes, it does cause many problems, but it is something that can be overcome if you want to do it enough. I never thought I would be able to be AF. I have never taken Bac but lots on here do - read the many threads. It seems to work very well for so many. Topa worked for me and although it did give me some trouble I wasn't sure how much of that was my age (LOL).

Anyway, if you have done it before but only lasted a couple of weeks, you need to do it again coming back here constantly for the support. If you think you might have trouble with withdrawal initially stopping, either talk to your doc - or I think with the Bac, that you keep drinking initially - but am not sure. Someone else can answer questions about the Bac for you. There are lots of threads in the meds section.

This is something that you can do - but you have to want to - and be strong. life without AL seemed scary for me at first, but it still goes on! Check out the Bac threads and go for it. Oh - and did I say - it is NOT shameful.

hugs to you, sunshinedaisies x

[here and now]

Day 1

Baclofen day 2

Rhiannon, I am on day 2 of Baclofen. Definitely recommend the medication threads and that you do your research. I have been drinking for 30 years and have never been AF for more than 2 days. I also have a young daughter and am deeply afraid for her if something were to happen to me. We can all do this together.

[prancy]

Day 1

Rhiannon, welcome back. That is one of the wonderful aspects of MWO. It is here for you when you need it. I took Bac for a while but it made me feel very strange and finally I decided I would just stop the AL. Period. So I did not finish the Bac but nevertheless was able to stop drinking. I am not a bit over two months AF. Not a lifetime,but a darn long time for me! I did it by being determined, reading a lot of stuff, including the MWO book, and coming on here a lot to post or to simply read the posts. Again the good thing about this site is that it is available to you 24 hours a day. Many people also find AA helpful, especially during those initial days. It creates a support base and gives you someone to call if you think you are going to take a drink.
I wish you the very best. Your situation sounds serious and what a terrible thing it would be to leave your daughters behind. And so NOT necessary. You can do this. Just do it one hour as a time. And try not to have the thoughts in your mind that you have not been able to succeed before beyond two weeks and that your family has a history of alcoholism. They just set you up to rationalize why you cannot succeed. But you can! Put positive thoughts in your brain about how wonderful it will be when you are free of the compulsive desire to drink and when you wake up feeling rested and fit.
prancy

[prancy]

Day 1

I meant to say I AM a bit over two months AF. Goodness! And also, I should also say that many people have had positive experiences with BAC. Taking it did make me feel like I had something to lean on for a while. Just in the long run, I didn't need it.

[mommacog]

Day 1

Rhiannan, have you tried Vivitrol? I am half way through a week long detox outpatient program with Librium and a mood stabilizer to help me throught he first week and then I will start the Vivitrol after I have a week with no alcohol. I am determined to do this for myself and my kids! Years of not making any plans after 4pm that require me to leave my wine and my house need to end! Good luck to you!!

[SoFlo1]

Day 1

Rhiannon;919469 wrote: I am interested in busting back out my supplements and possibly ordering some Baclofen. I have been reading some interesting things about it here. Has it worked for anyone?

YES - But it seems to work diffently for different people. I used it to go completey AF, not moderate, and found that after about 4 weeks of getting over the worst of my cravings, I could taper off and now do not feel a need to take it at all. It was an invaluable tool for me that helped remove the preoccupation with Alcohol so I could get to the parts of my life that needed immediate work.

I also hear you on the shame thing - we can only disappoint ourselves so many times before failure starts to be internalized and take over our identity. Building an AF lifeone day at a time you'll probably feel the shame fading as you begin to have success. Good luck and PM me if you need any info on my Bac experience.