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WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

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    #1

    WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

    OK, SO I'M REACHING MY 3O DAY AF MARK (WITH THE HELP OF TOPA THANK GOD)
    AND FOR THAT I AM EXTREMELY GRATEFUL!
    BUT EMOTIONALLY- I'M UP, I'M DOWN, I'M HAPPY THEN I'M ANGRY,I'M CALM THEN I'M NERVOUS...... WHAT THE F....K AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?
    ALCOHOL WAS ALWAYS MY MEDICINE!
    I'M NOW REALIZING THAT EVERYTIME I FELT THE SLIGHTEST EMOTION, I WOULD JUST GO & NUMB MYSELF!
    I KNOW THIS IS GOING TO BE A LONG JOURNEY(CONSIDERING I'VE BEEN DRINKING DAILY FOR THE PAST 8 YRS).
    ANY SUPPORT WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED:thanks:
    Tags: None
    #2
    WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

    First of all HUGE congratualtions on getting to your 30 days.

    I'm 13 months and a bit AF and can go through all those emotions in a day. I think it's called being normal. Every thing you say there is exactly how I used to re-act.
    Just stick with it ,it does get easier coping but I find that distraction still works. Even down to just having a shower, washing my hair and styling it.
    J x
    :l
    It could be worse, I could be filing.
    AF since 7/7/2009

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      #3
      WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

      Havefaith - Your name is actually your answer! I went through exactly the same, it was an emotional rollercoaster. I wasnt used to feeling these emotions as I too usually numbed everything with alcohol. Once you get used to it you realize that, thats what being alive is all about and not only do we get to feel the lows but the highs are even better too! Have faith, it will soon settle down. I have to say the journey of getting to know myself AF has been amazing and I wouldnt have missed it for the world. Underneath there is someone who has been smothered by AL and who wants to get out and live, enjoy the journey....

      Great job on 30 days AF! :yougo::yougo::yougo:
      "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
      AF - JAN 1st 2010
      NF - May 1996

      Comment

        #4
        WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

        Thank you for the support.
        I've been numb for so long that I forget that normal people deal with this shit on a daily basis without ever picking up a drink! Boy- this is going to take some getting used to(I guess that's where the one day @ a time phrase came from).

        Comment

          #5
          WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

          havefaith
          I love your name.
          Keep up the good work!

          xoxo
          Belle
          "Be still and know that I am God"

          Psalm 46:10

          Comment

            #6
            WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

            awesome job on 30 days af .. now just keep on doing what you have been doing and write even more ... your life is your to do as you feel ..so just keep adding to the story ... as you can see it has and will get even better as time goes on ...
            :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
            best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

            Comment

              #7
              WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

              Congrats on your 30 AF days havefaith!!
              That's great news, good work. It takes a bit of time but your emotions will adjust especially when you really comprehend the gift you've given yourself - freedom!

              Deep breaths, meditation, learning to relax without AL all help.
              Start doing some of the things you haven't been able to do during your drinking career.

              Enjoy your freedom

              Lav
              AF since 03/26/09
              NF since 05/19/09
              Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

              Comment

                #8
                WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                30 days WOW--you are doing awasome!! But listen--dealing with feelings is hard...perhaps the reason you started drinking?....you may want to look into talking to someone...therapist?...hey, what can it hurt...just have to keep on trying.

                I think you are doing great!! Keep up the good work!!

                Wonka

                Comment

                  #9
                  WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                  Thank you everybody for the nice advise...
                  I actually do have a therapist that I went to see today and told her about the Topa & this Program.
                  Although She is very understanding, I'm still glad I can bounnce my thoughts around on this forum(She has never been an alcoholic & the people here know exactly where I'm coming from).
                  So once again, thank you!

                  Comment

                    #10
                    WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                    Congratulations on your success! You've come this far, no sense in looking back. I agree with your opinion of the therapist. People who are not alcoholics have no idea what it's like. I was like you that whenever any emotion hit, I hit the bottle. But you can do it!

                    JJ

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                      #11
                      WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                      Hi HaveFaith...I'm with you! I'm on day 33 AF and I am definitely on an emotional rollercoaster. I think Chill's expression "smothered with alcohol" is a really good one. I reached for the bottle (or comforted myself with the promise that soon I would be reaching for the bottle) whenever I felt ANYTHING...seriously. If I was disappointed or stressed from work? Bottle. Sad and missing someone I lost? Bottle. Happy that "House" was on TV? Bottle.
                      Dealing with stress and fear especially have been an issue for me since quitting...that's usually when I get cravings. That's when I remind myself that this is life and this is what "normal" people deal with every day and that I will get better at it as time goes on.
                      Congratulations on your great success so far!
                      Tomorrow's another day.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                        Hi havefaith,

                        I am an alcoholic and have not had a drink for 78 days and counting!! I absolutely relate to you feeling overwhelmed by your emotions. My initial 30 days was an emotional roller coaster! I just did not know what to do with all those feelings I had. It was odd. Odd to not comotose them with drink. I wasnt even sure if I could live my life without drinking.

                        But stick with it because it does get easier. Everyone use to say that to me and I use to wonder how that would be possible...three months of sobreity has done wonders for me so far. I have lost the point in drinking and I am alot more stable emotionally. My drunk self is becoming a distant memory and I am able to deal with life's ups and downs without instantly thinking of alcohol.

                        Hang on there! x
                        Be strong-
                        We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                        Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

                        Comment

                          #13
                          WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                          HI Havefaith,

                          It is quite an experience to get reacquainted with your emotions. My first month or 2 I was all over the place, I felt like a chimpanzee trying to drive a car for the first time. Once we get sober we have to relearn all sorts of different behaviours. It's a complicated process, but it gets better and better as time goes by.

                          I take evening primrose twice a day along with the other supplements and I find that this does help with somewhat in evening out my emotions. Stick with it you are ding great!
                          While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.
                          Benjamin Franklin

                          Comment

                            #14
                            WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                            God, it feels good to hear that I'm not an alien!
                            I mean I reeeeeallyyy want to stop drinking for good( it has done alot of damage in my life)
                            It's just so nice to hear that other people know exactly what I'm going through!

                            YOU GUYS ARE THE GREATEST!

                            Comment

                              #15
                              WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THESE FEELINGS?

                              havefaith I use to be hangover every sunday cause I drank too much saturday night. Like clockwork.I use to wake up to bruises, money missing, and no collection of what I did. I was too tired to plan any social event with friends and family because i wasnt sure if I could drive the next day. Plus I needed to drink on sunday to calm my jitters....How scary is that!!

                              Thank God thats OVER!!!
                              Be strong-
                              We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                              Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

                              Comment

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