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Lillypond

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    Lillypond

    Hi to you all
    Thank you all for your support, my son and daughter already know I have a al problem, daughter has already confronted me with it, to say the least she is disgusted with me, and no I don't blame her, I'm disgusted with myself.hav'nt had al since last sat, it is good to get up in the morning feeling better, but this morning I have butterflys in my stomach, I wonder whats that all about, I think I'm getting scared, I dont know.has anyboby got any sugestions. well I'm away to keep myself busy, I hope I can keep this up, and also hope you don't mind me reporting on the site everyday.
    Have a good weekend to all.

    Lillypond x

    #2
    Lillypond

    Lillypond - this is what the site is for - reporting every day if that is what you need! We all want to help you and sometimes all you need is a friendly voice at the other end!! I think you have done really well if you haven't had AL since last Sat!! That is amazing !!!! Well done! I think it is sad that your daughter obviously has no idea what you are going through - how old is she? Is she old enough that you can talk to her? You are doing really well!

    WHY are you disgusted with yourself? You should be so proud! You have come so far - Lillypond - please feel good about what you have done so far! You CAN keep this up - keep coming here - keep talking - we can help you. Hugs to you.

    Sunshinedaisies xx
    How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

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      #3
      Lillypond

      hi sunshinedaisies
      My daughter is 38, not easy to talk, her atitude is build a bridge and get over it, and no she does not understand what I am going through.But I am trying to keep strong regardless of what she thinks of me, she has not called me all week and not replying to my txt messages, but as I said I am detemined to stay strong. I am so glad I have this site to come to, you guys are amazing with all the support you have giving me.
      Hugs to you back

      Lillypond x

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        #4
        Lillypond

        Lilly congrats on a week AF! You are doing amazingly....
        I wouldn't worry about the butterflies, there could be a million reasons for them even unrelated to drinking. Maybe you are excited at reaching your week AF?!

        Please keep checking in as you will get the support you need right now, and don't fret about your daughter, you don't need to be getting upset and finding reasons to drink. She probably doesn't know what you are going through (most normal drinkers can't!) and she might not think you are really serious about stopping, hopefully when she does she will be more supportive. Right now though you have to make your no.1 priority staying sober.
        "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
        AF - JAN 1st 2010
        NF - May 1996

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          #5
          Lillypond

          Hi Lilly! You should be so proud of yourself! What you have acheived is IMMENSE! I remember just managing three days without alcohol. It felt like three years to me. I slept badly and generally felt weird. Just take it day by day and you will see that the weeks will turn to months. It will get easier. Everyone said that to me and they are are right. x
          Be strong-
          We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
          Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

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            #6
            Lillypond

            Hi Lilly
            I sooo understand what your saying about your daughter,mine is 22 and is so disgusted with me. She told me last night that she would NEVER understand why i drink and that i will loose everyone around me.I'm on day 3 here after drinking last week. (She's happy enough to leave her 1yr old son with me all day yesterday and from 8am this morning till 7pm tonight,so she has a little bit of trust i think).She also told me that i hurt her so much this week. I can understand shes speaking through hurt but its hard to hear. Good luck to you here its a great place.

            Jodiex

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              #7
              Lillypond

              Hi To All
              Just home from visiting friends, had a good day, butterflys settling down, so far so good,still no AL.
              I dont think I would of managed this without all your support, so a big big thank you to you all.
              I am still taking one day at a time, don't want to get too far ahead of myself.

              Lillypond x

              Comment


                #8
                Lillypond

                Hi Lilly,

                The butterflies sound normal if uncomfortable (here's a partial list of withdrawal symptoms):

                ?Jumpiness or nervousness
                ?Shakiness
                ?Anxiety
                ?Irritability; easily excited
                ?Emotional volatility, rapid emotional changes
                ?Depression
                ?Fatigue

                A therapist put it like this to me: I'm a radio, and alcohol turned the volume down on all my feelings. When you stop drowning them out, the feelings seem so incredibly LOUD when you first hear them again, until you adjust to the sound and the volume goes to normal. A slightly whack analogy, but it worked for me.

                Congratulations on week 1 AF! Don't worry about your daughter; if you want the relationship to improve in the future, focus on yourself right now. Let yourself feel GOOD about what you've accomplished. :l
                AF since July 15, 2010. :applouse:
                "People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim." —Ann Landers

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                  #9
                  Lillypond

                  Thanks
                  You are all a god send, with all your support, I am taking all the info you are all giving me on board.

                  Love to all
                  Lillypond x

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Lillypond

                    hi lily just sending a friendly hello .. keep doing your best and awesome on be af.. dont worry about the butterflys .. life gets better and better as time goes on
                    :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
                    best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Lillypond

                      LIL, do this for you. Your children will see it, appreciate it, benefit from it, but it has to be for you. I know it sounds selfish, did to me the first time I was taught it, but what it means is without ourselves, there is nothing. Our children go on to their lives, scarred by us, but they don't die because we do. They are part of us. But it is OUR life, and that's hard for us to understand. Once WE do the right thing, for OURSELVES, then everyone else benefits.
                      Never apologize for posting, unless they are offensive. Post as much, as often, as you like. I'm not here often, but am available if you need me.
                      Ruby
                      sigpic
                      Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                      awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Lillypond

                        before alcohol bested me, i thought the same way as your daughter. only when someone walks in our shoes do they understand. a week af is AMAZING!!! everyone who said that you are your #1 priority has it right. be as selfish as you need to be to get well!!

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