Sober (AF) September Challenge

[mollyka]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hi every one, was on lates today so not long in. Lovely to read all the posts, I can't keep up that's the only problem! Thanks for all the kind words about my young fella - he is a good lad, and yes Choice it probably was very brave of your Dad to speak at all, men find it much harder to speak about things anyway.
Dewdrop, you are so right about the Christmas thing. When you tell yourself it isn't a problem, then it doesn't have to be. My biggest problem at Christmas used to be to stay sober enough to cook the dinner - always managed but that's sad isn't it!
Well done Anon with the runnin and Sid on a sober birthday! I can't run (haven't tried anyway for a long time!) and I only managed my first sober birthday a month ago, so well done both of you
Night Peace, Neart, SpinningJ and Sunbeam and anyone else I have left out I'm sorry, see you all tomorrow
Molly

[witchywoman]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Think I have had a small breakthru

Hi Guys
hope everyone is doing well, like you Choice, I love getting online 1st thing in the morning to check out how everyone is going.
I have been struggling to admit even to myself that I am an alcoholic, even though I know I had a problem with drinking & wanted to live life AF I still couldnt label myself an alcoholic, and now I think I know why. Last night I was trying to say it outloud "I'm an alcoholic" but in my head I was going "no I am not like....."
You see my personal experience with an alcoholic was growing up with my father, during the day, when hes sober he is a lovely person, would do anything to help anyone, but every night he drinks alot & once hes drunk, he turns into an emotionally/mentally abusive mean, shambling, stumbling, sluring nasty person. (FYI, even though hes going thru chemo, he hasnt stopped drinking)
When I drink, I do it alone, I not mean to anyone, I dont drunk dial people, if anything i tend to fall in love with the world. I get drunk, sit in my "happy" little place untill I get tired & i go to sleep. So different from my father, my father the alcoholic. So I need to stop comparing my drinking to his, even thought Im not mean to anyone & havent hurt anyone with my drinking I have hurt myself!!!
Anyway enough about me LOL, since we are nearing the end of September, I hope we are going to continue & keep the group going for Sober October
thanks everyone, I could not have gotten as far as I have without everyone here.

[choice]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hey WitchyWoman,

You sound really great. It's so surreal to sit there with that label of "what am I???" going on back and forth in ones head. I think I drove myself crazy one afternoon trying to come to terms with my own circumstances. So I just decided to label myself an alcholic so I could be done with it and save myself. The question still comes up probably daily... but it's just kinda more annoying now when my junkie head tries to reason with my sober one... All I know for absolute sure is I'm addicted to AL... I know what you mean about drinking alone and the "happy place". There is a since of well being and loving the world after a few drinks. I'll admit I have been missing that feeling. But, what's replaced it feels more like something I can really sink my teeth into. The world is still wonderful, even more so free. I actually am beginning to feel that the "happy place, love the world" feeling sober it's more honest and real. At first it felt less intense but it is becoming more genuine and I'm beginning to trust it more and more. Believe it or not I started to question this again one day and jumped into a thread in MWO of a picture of a woman in her 40's - 50's brain who had a bottle a day habit there are large holes in her brain. Needless to say, the reality of this keeps hitting home. Sorry everyone I didn't mean to be graphic... it's just something that kept me from questioning if I should or shouldn't drink..

[Doggygirl]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hello September Challengers!!

Happy Birthday (belated) to Sid and also happy 30 days :yougo: to choice and Spinning J!!

Witchy, I can't even describe the mind games I played with myself through the years, with the express purpose of convincing myself I am NOT, and I repeat NOT and alcoholic. Looking back, I wish I would have accepted the truth sooner, gotten sober and gotten on with it at a younger age! But the past is the past and the only day that matters is today. So onward...

Also I have learned to look for similarities rather than differences between myself and other addicts. I can understand myself and my disease (affliction, whatever you like to call it) better that way.

Also, this disease (whatever term you like) is progressive. The way it manifests in your life today might not be the way it manifests if you were to keep drinking. I never thought I was a mean drunk either. I really wasn't for the first 20+ years of it. But in the latter few years, I DID start getting mean. I didn't want to believe it, but it was true. I always tried to justify it with a "well, but it's your fault I acted that way because you did ___________ to me!" But the truth is, I got to a point where after a certain amount of drinking I was itching for an argument. Drinking wasn't always that "dark" even when I was very drunk. But it sure got "dark" in the end.

Like choice, accepting that I am alcoholic simply acknowledges a fact of my life that I have to deal with it. If I don't accept it, I sure can't effectively deal with it. For me, it's a relief to call a spade a spade and move on.

Happy travels to one and all! Is everyone going to stay in for an October challenge?

DG

[Sunbeam]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hi all,
Good conversation, "What am I?" I have a hard time with the alcoholic label, I'm more of a the problem drinker described in the MWO book. I can reliably stop at two drinks with a restaurant meal. On the other hand, drinking at home is out of my life for good, because when a bottle is available I will empty it. Most days I never had anything to drink, even before coming here to MWO. Drinking was mostly a problem on those Sunday afternoons, and it was encroaching on other days of my life. I was worried that I might increase my drinking when I began to work less. That's now, I just started to work part-time this summer. Drinking more just isn't going to happen. I don't want to drink, I want to enjoy wine with a nice meal. Those are different experiences: one I can control, the other I can't. After this month, I expect to limit myself to wine with those restaurant meals. It feels good to get that out in the open.

[mollyka]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Morning all! Witchy, I know exactly what you are saying. I have to say I agree with Choice tho - I just call myself an alkie and that's the end of it. I too would have termed myself a really pleasant drinker - I know I never got cranky or mean, loved the buzz and the worst thing I did (I thought) was fall asleep (go unconscious on the couch?). It was only when I stopped drinking that I realised I was having an affect on the family - it was making them unhappy and worried, so my perception of my drinking was thro 'rose tinted glasses' I guess.
Good on you Sunbeam if you can do that - I couldn't. I'd be just waiting to get home from the restaurant to fall into a bottle.
DG, I hope we can continue this thread on next month, I think it is vibrant and full of committed, opinionated (in the nicest sense) and fun people, it's the first place I head to when I come on here!
Hey to everyone else to come today
Molly

[enja]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Heh, Molly, you're saying Good Morning as I'm saying Good Night - feels like back to the future! :H

Guess I'll raise my hand and say, I'm an alcoholic too, though I've only said it to the hubby; not quite ready to actually say it out loud to anyone else though I'm sure it's obvious to them based on what I've talked about regarding my new found AF status.

Sunbeam, as Molly mentioned, kudos to you for being able to stop at a couple of drinks with a meal out - I too would just be waiting to get back home and then get stuck in. In fact that's just what I did the day before I joined MWO - We'd been out for a lovely meal, had a cocktail then shared a bottle of wine with dinner and it was perfect and I felt really good but then once we were back home I proceeded to drink nearly two bottle of wine by myself. I felt so terrible the next day, it was the final straw- thank goodness I had MWO to turn to and of course the Sober September Gang! :l This thread has been my anchor.

[Anjicia]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Good morning everyone its day 28 for me. I got an AA meeting in last night which was good and there was at least 35 or more people there. My dad was an alcholic and his personality changed when he drank. Without drink he was quiet and easy going but he when had too many he could get nasty slurring shouting and bad tempered wthout a good word to say about anyone. He never hit any of us but verbally made up for when drunk. Sadly he died over 20 years ago and it was drink and tabbaco related as he smoked heavy when drinking. As for me binge drinker problem drinker alcho, i guess i'm all of these but it doesn't matter what i call myself i can't stop at 2 drinks with a meal. Like you Molly i would be rushing to the offie for a bottle to bring home to get the buzz. I regret i didn't sort out my drinking problem earlier in my life but thats the past today is the present and i and all of us here can only take it odat. Really hope to continue on to the october tread. I'm sure most of us will be on board its good to another challange to aim for. Well have a good thursday and i hope you all reach your goals for today. :wave::bananacomputer:

[anon]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Good Morning everyone. Day 18 here. Like Molly this is the first thing I look at when I switch on the computer. It has now been 2 years of trying to get sober and this has been the tool that helped me the most to stay AF for more than 5 days.
The sun is out here again after a night of wind and rain. So off to hang the washing out --take the grandchildren to school and go for a run.
Love to you all:thanks:

[enja]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Wanted to say well done to Sid for staying AF on your birthday. And a cheer to Anon for running 10k, Dewdrop for Zumbaing and being strong in telling her friend that she wasn't drinking - I can see (for me anyway) how it would have been easy to slip up there. A cheer to Molly for talking with her son and getting a kiss - I have a 17 year old and I know how precious those kisses are! Firefox, you're soooo close to that first magic 30 days, well done!

Doggy, choice, witchy, neart, Peace, Spinning, JackieC (hope I'm not forgetting anyone) thanks for all your updates, I learn something everytime and look forward to everyones posts.

Nighty night, see y'all tomorrow!

:h

[Anjicia]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hi Neart i just saw your post while checking back. I don't have anyone to go to salsa classes with. Are you in the dublin area or near? There some good classes in the city. Have you done salsa before?

[Dewdrop]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Morning Guys :l

My this has been a busy thread overnight! Like you all I often head here first thing just to check in on everyone and I am in for a Sober October. There have been some very interesting posts so lots to read back over, and as usual loads of interesting advice and thoughts on things. You are such a great bunch :thanks:

Well it is raining and dull here but I am so happy because today is DAY 30 :yay::yay::yay: and I am just so very grateful for getting here. It has only been possible with the support of all you guys and I just can't express enough just how much I appreciate all your help and support. Choice, Spinning and Coco-Nut doesn't it just feel fantastic, and to everyone else hang in there and keep going.

Love you all,

Dewdrop :h

[neart]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hi guys I haven't had time to read over the posts, just checking in to say I'm away for a few days so I won't be checking in till Sunday I'd say. Hope everyone has a good couple of days xx

[Hippy Chick]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hi everyone.
Just thought I would pop my head in and say hello even though it nearly the end of September and I havent visited this thread yet.

Been very slack with my visits lately and am suffering. Been having wicked thoughts of having a drink again. When will this ever end?

Still dont think I have really accepted that I cant drink again even after ten months. I would love to be like you sunbeam and be able to stop after one or two. But I like the buzz i get. If I feel that good with one or two, imagine how good I would feel with the rest of the bottle! That's what my booze brain tells me anyway.....

But at least I have this sanctuary to visit when I feel like that.

Have a good night/day everyone.

hipster

[Sunbeam]

Sober (AF) September Challenge

Hippy Chick,
Welcome! There is still a week left in September, so you can join us if you like.