Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

[RedFingers]

I stumbled across this place while looking up alcoholism drugs. Apparently I have a problem, and its time to face it like the problem it is instead of this macho attitude "its not a problem, and I can stop at any time!" .....Long story short, I thought when I started back to college this Fall (plus I work full time), I would slow down my drinking, especially during the week, and save it for the weekends. Well, I thought I would only drink 8-10 beers on the wknds and it seems I somehow try to make up for the light drinking during the week.
I put away 2 cases of beer this past weekend and ended up missing work and a day of class because of a test I failed to be prepared for. Thats it! Ive had it! I cant keep doing this if Im going to make good grades and actually learn what Im in school for. I need to stop anyway, 20 years of drinking and partying is enough. Ive been very slow on the partying, hardly go out in the last 4 years, but its like I just do it at home.

Anyways, just wanted to say Hi, and Monday was day 1 of hopefully many days in a row of no drinks. I signed up to that graph and want zeroes as much as possible. Beer was always my thing, and I thought it was ok since Im not doing drugs or going to the liquor store every week.....boy was I wrong....alcohol is alcohol. Time to claw my way out of this hole, hence my chosen nic because I know its gonna be a bloody battle. Thanks for reading.

[savon19]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Hi Redfingers - Anger, directed in a positive way, can be the best fuel for change.

It sounds like you're using that anger to your benefit.

Oh, and WELCOME!! Post as much as you like - let it all out. You will always find someone who will relate, someone who can maybe give you some good advice - and rarely anyone who will judge!

If you're still in college, I'm thinking you must be pretty young. How GREAT that you've taken stock of things when young - I commend you for that. Know that it truly IS a progressive disease/condition (or whatever you want to call it!).

Great good luck. All it really takes is focus, making up one's mind... (I know! Easier said than done!!)

[Charlotte's Web]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Hi Red,

Yep...I too am sick of drinking and it's effects.

I went back to college in July as a mature student. As it's two evenings a week, I was hoping that it would knock out two drinking days but, no, I just drink when I get home.

I really want to beat this. I feel positive this morning and wish I could hold onto this feeling when witching hour comes along later.

I don't know where you are but maybe we can catch up here tomorrow and confirm that we made another day.

[RedFingers]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Thanks. Well, not too young, Im 38, and just starting back to college. Trying to finish something I stopped when I was 24....if I could just go back in time and beat the crap out of myself for quitting school and drinking away all of that time and money. Its amazing how looking back, it was a lot invested for what, a few good times and memories? Yeah, there were some good moments I guess, but the daily beat of work, then reward myself, well, I got myself addicted, some reward huh? lol. But now at 38, things will change.... better late than never I guess.

[aspman]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

good job on finding this place guys, it has saved my life and can for you too!
this thread has some gr8 ideas and tips,
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

remember, al is a sly sneaky bastd so dont give him a chance...

asp

[RedFingers]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Charlotte's Web;964988 wrote: Hi Red,

Yep...I too am sick of drinking and it's effects.

I went back to college in July as a mature student. As it's two evenings a week, I was hoping that it would knock out two drinking days but, no, I just drink when I get home.

I really want to beat this. I feel positive this morning and wish I could hold onto this feeling when witching hour comes along later.

I don't know where you are but maybe we can catch up here tomorrow and confirm that we made another day.

Oh, I'll be on tomorrow from SC in the US. I work 3rd shift so nights are usually not too bad for me. Its when I get off of work thats bad. So good luck, just start that drinking chart here on the site and set a goal to put a ZERO in each day. Thats how Im doing it. Im done. I thought I could moderate, and maybe some people can and it works for them, but I'll just end up making up for it on the weekend. So Im done, no matter what hour, birthdays, hard days work, celebrating my fav football team winning, Kaput, its over for me. For once I'd like to see a fully sober weekend.
See ya tomorrow.

[RedFingers]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

aspman;964993 wrote: good job on finding this place guys, it has saved my life and can for you too!
this thread has some gr8 ideas and tips,
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

remember, al is a sly sneaky bastd so dont give him a chance...

asp

GREAT thread....Thanks!
Found something new to say to myself when an urge comes......"I DONT DRINK ALCOHOL"
add that to "I want a zero for the day" and it should attack any urges coming my way :fingers:

[Charlotte's Web]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

aspman;964993 wrote: good job on finding this place guys, it has saved my life and can for you too!
this thread has some gr8 ideas and tips,
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

remember, al is a sly sneaky bastd so dont give him a chance...

asp

Thanks Aspman,

I have seen it's quite a long thread so I will start reading through it at witching hour.

[ronaldolover]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Welcome RedFingers! Glad you have decided to join us here. It is a great place to find support. I think the best part for me is that this site helps me realize that I am not alone. It is comforting to hear stories from others who are in your exact same position. Keep posting and keep us updated on your progress.

[paguy]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Hello Redfingers and :welcome:. You have come to a great place for knowledge, feedback and support. I applaud you for your honesty and determination to turn things around. Visit often and keep up the great work. It does get easier with time.

Best of luck to you!

[choice]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

:welcome: RedFingers,
I was wondering where I was with my drinking habit when I found this sight too. And my eyes got opened real wide. I've been drinking for about 20 years myself. (I'm 37). I agree it's a long enough time and the more I learn about how it affects the brain into our 40's and 50's I don't question this decision to free myself from AL at all. You sound very positive and determined right on!
-Choice

[Mish]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

[QUOTE=RedFingers;964970]I stumbled across this place while looking up alcoholism drugs. Apparently I have a problem...

I soooooo recognise myself in this quote. Apparently suggests to me that others have told you you have a problem and you're still a teeny weeny bit in denial about it. In my case I was a bit offended (surely I wasn't as bad as they said???), even though I knew at some level that it was true.
I've been hearing it since I was 25. I'm now 55. It's still less than a month since I pulled my head out of the sand and said the scary words. "I am an alcoholic."
(I keep saying it...it feels so good to admit it to myself at last.)
You have more years ahead of you to mess up with AL if you stay in this place. You wouldn't have even stumbled across this site unless you were ready to start some place, so :goodjob:
This is a wonderful site. Compassion, support, encouragement and understanding and in no time you'll find yourself reaching out to others. MWO is life-saving.
Watch "Rain In My Heart" and see what denial and AL can do if left to their own devices.
I wish you every success.
Mish

[Mish]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

choice;965059 wrote: :welcome: RedFingers,I
... and the more I learn about how it affects the brain into our 40's and 50's I don't question this decision to free myself from AL at all.
-Choice

GAAaaahhhhhhh!!!!
Oh dear oh dear oh dear, choice, I'm 55, and have been drinking for about 37 years on and off.
(Maybe a good thing I had a pretty good brain to start off with).
Hugs
Mish :l

[RedFingers]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

[quote]Mishmash;965087 wrote:

I stumbled across this place while looking up alcoholism drugs. Apparently I have a problem...

I soooooo recognise myself in this quote. Apparently

suggests to me that others have told you you have a problem and you're still a teeny weeny bit in denial about it. In my case I was a bit offended (surely I wasn't as bad as they said???), even though I knew at some level that it was true.
Mish

The "apparently" I was suggesting was the wake up call to myself this past weekend, missing work sunday and monday night, and missing some classes...as in I really thought I had control over moderating it and finally realized I dont. My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years, I dont have any kids, and she never says anything to me because she just knew Im going to do it regardless of what is said to me. She has told me to slow down a few times after Ive been hungover and complaining, but she always says it with a kind voice and loving gesture. And Ive done a pretty good job of hiding it from coworkers.....unfortunately I dont have many friends anymore because of their drinking and drug problems, and my not having much time to make new ones. So its just me and my girl (but Im happy with that). And yes, I was in denial until after this past weekend, so you're right there But Im no longer denying it and ready to face this head on. Thanks so much for your encouragement.

[ronaldolover]

Just saying Hi; man am I sick of being sick...

Refingers.....at least you have realized that it was time for a change. I understand your feeling alone except for your girl.....right now I feel like it is just my husband and I. All of the so called "friends" we had were just bad influences who we only knew from going to the bar and who ended up turning their backs on us. I think what we need to do is concentrate on being sober with our significant other and then find some new friends who are AF! Congrats on being AF....and keep up the good work!