A month I think?

[OverIt2007]

A month I think?

I am VERY proud of you! As a person who is struggling at the moment, your story gives me encouragement. It seems like you are getting out of harms way and enjoying your life now. I truly understand your struggles, and it makes me smile when I see your happiness showing through in your posts and watch you emerge a happier person. Your doing really great, and as I said, I am really PROUD of you. Your life will truly get better and better the longer you go. Keep on keeping on!!

[mama bear]

A month I think?

Bravo!!! You ok Over it???

[OverIt2007]

A month I think?

Hi Mama. Yes, I am fine. I sent you a P.M.

[okkslady]

A month I think?

thanks

Hi OverIt and thanks for your words....Your words help me you are right it is a struggle....and it helps to keep coming back and reading....seeing the encouragement and even reading my own words to remind me of the sadness I felt and now some happy times that I am experiencing...I want to continue but everyday is a struggle because alcohol is constantly on my mind....well not constantly but alot!!! It seems like there is always temptation...I had a guy ask me out today and he said "lets go have some fun and a couple drinks..." I told him I couldnt because of no baby sitter but honestly I didnt want to have to explain my story and say "I dont drink because I have a drinking problem" well I coulda just said I dont drink but I didnt want to go into the details of why I dont because he and I have hung out before and drinking was involved. I almost broke down and just went with him because we do have fun together but like I said I am not strong enough yet and even if I had one drink I would feel guilt tomorrow....I have just started to open up to my family and tell them that I had a problem and am trying to get over my problem...Sorry I am rambling kinda letting things out as they come lol take care OverIt and everybody else...I love to talk/write so feel free to message or post!!!!

[mere]

A month I think?

Okkslady -
You are truly inspiring and am so glad you are here to learn from. I'm a newbie but learn so much from you and others.
The relationship you have with your son (when not drinking) sounds so precious. I'm glad you are experiencing that - you never get it back that's for sure.
Good resolve on not going out with the fella you had fun with until you feel stronger.
Keep it up and thanks for sharing.

[okkslady]

A month I think?



Thanks for the message Mere....I feel I am a newbie as well and learning everyday.....I too find inspiration in all the people who post their struggles and set backs and triumphs....this is truely a great site and i am blessed to have found it. I posted a video where Chris Fergeuson said that alcoholism is a Chronic Condition and he still fights with it after fifteen years sober...I sit back and think....wow how did this happen, and how come I continued to hurt myself for sooo long? I was lost but slowely coming out of the fog...Goodnight to everybody...

[OverIt2007]

A month I think?

Hi Okkslady!

I just wanted to post quickly in regards to dating and drinking. It seems we are both single Moms and therefore at some point of course we will date.

At a time when I was taking my Antabuse (so therefore I could not drink) I happened to meet a guy over the internet. Of course I could not drink while on Antabuse, so I went into a new experience of not drinking at all and dating.

The comparision of being sober and getting to know somebody and the comparision of "partying" with some new guy was simply no comparision. I truly enjoyed the experience and felt like for the first time I was being the "real" me, responsible, and it was great! My sense of self esteem improved by leaps and bounds and in no time at all I was sober dating like a true professional (lol) and ENJOYING every minute of it.

To sum it up, when you get your sober legs under you firm, you will be amazed at how much you can enjoy sober dating. In fact, with you new self esteem in firm place, you will be so picky that only the very best guys out there will win your attention. You will now realize that you deserve the best because YOU are the best. And those loser guys who just want to party with you and get you drunk, will not even have a place in your life. You can Say "get lost losers, I only date good guys who know my TRUE VALUE"

[mere]

A month I think?

I can relate to the two of you and dating while under the influence. Drinking always rushed things for me and then when I wasn't I wondered "how in the world" or "why in the world did I let it go this fast and far?" I always felt rather cheap. So I'm with you OverIT 2007 I'm going AF to see if I even like the guy!
Here's to an AF Tuesday@

[okkslady]

A month I think?

awesome

Yes ...u are soooo right OverIt!!!! In the past with drinking and dating guys they didnt even see the real me and some of the guys I went out with....wow...lol I sit here today and think they wouldnt fit into this life that I am trying to build. When I look back on it all my dates, except for a few, had alcohol involved. I have cut ties with a guy I have known for years and we have been off and on dating...all centered around clubs, parties, bars, beer, liquor...He doesnt care about me and I have come to realize I have to take care of myself...well mere n overit we could start a whole new thread on dating and men and how being sober changes relationships!!! I look forward to my first sober date...doesnt look like it will be anytime soon lol

[okkslady]

A month I think?

feeling kinda down 2day blah....I think about people out on dates drinking and controlling themselves....people out on this friday night and I am at home. If I was still drinking I woulda went out. I am still in the beginning stage I guess and have not had time to make new sober friends...idk just wanted to say I am feeling down today

[OverIt2007]

A month I think?

Hey okkslady!

I hope your in a better mood and frame of mind today You know, sometimes when we get sober we think we are supposed to be super happy all the time. Well, thats not the case because although we get sober, which is great! There are just ups and downs with plain old life. Thats just normal. I think before when we felt down, we just would reach for a drink to change our moods. I know thats what I am guilty of.

Just remember that every morning has the potential to be a great day. Feeling uncomfortable in your moods does not have to last forever, sometimes the new day brings a whole new outlook on your life.

Do you like to exercise at all? I have found that getting some fresh air or hitting the gym can put me in a whole new frame of mind and quickly. Plus at my gym, I like to look at all the hot bodied men LOL!!!

Hope to see your posts soon and be well and sober

[okkslady]

A month I think?

hello

yes I feel better today!!! last night was little blue. I always gotta think about how bad alcohol made me feel. If I went out last night id have a hangover today and be in a bad mood. I cooked breakfast and lunch for my son and if I was hungover that wouldnt have happend at all!!! I have a couple posts going lol and I think on one of em you said before to deal with these problems it was easy to just grab a drink....yes u are correct. I have to find other ways to deal with them. I was lonely last night and felt alone and my son could sense that....we were watching a movie and he was on one couch and I on the other... I said "do you want some ice cream cuz mom does" and he said "yes please..." then he said "mom are you ok?" and I told him "yes son mom is just a little sad tonight" so I got the ice cream and sat back on my couch and he said "mom do you need some company?" and I said "YES MY LOVE I DO!" and he came over and sat close to me and gave me a kiss and said "mom you are my love too" and believe I held the tears back and thought...THIS IS WHY I AM DOING THIS! and before I would have left this child to go out and drink and party and I would have missed this precious moment in my life??!!! Today is a good day...I feel blessed to be alive and to be with my son. Sober and aware and awake!!!!

[Doggygirl]

A month I think?

What a wonderful moment! Thanks for sharing that. These days, I'm finding that my gratitude list is a better deterent than my memories of the hangovers. (although they both work! )

DG

[okkslady]

A month I think?

urge

Temptation is back....Last night a friend I havent seen in awhile wanted to stop by my house when she got off of work and have some drinks....I said I couldnt because I had to wake early to get my son to school....well the truth is I really wanted to. The thoughts of what would it hurt to sit at home and have some beers, at least I will be at home? I am fighting with this thought....I didnt drink last night but wanted to really really bad

[Choochie]

A month I think?

Okk - sorry to hear that you're struggling. I'm new here so I'm not loaded with advice but just wanted to comment. I know that when I was drinking home is where I did the absolute most drinking because I knew I didn't have to drive. So, I don't think that's a safety net at all. What others tell me is that you have to change your routine. So, when I'm at home during the cocktail hour (when I drank) is when I do something different (most of the time I'm on this website reading, reading, reading).

What keeps me from going back is knowing that even if I started out with an intelligent amount of AL, I would eventually ratchet up to too much and start the dreaded cycle over again. I would stop sleeping well, wake up exhausted, feeling as though all my nerve endings were exposed, and then not feel even remotely functional until at least noon. Then I would start looking at the clock around 3, thinking great - not long until 5 - my cocktail time!!

Now I wake up feeling great and look forward to the day instead of struggling my way through it. And, that doesn't even count the mental beating up of myself that would consume my thoughts for hours and hours of the day -- always making promises to myself that I would stop, starting again, and then feeling that disappointment.

WHAT A RUT!!

Anyway, we live with our decisions at the end of the day and no one can make them for us. Just wanted to give you my two cents.

Hugs,
Choochie -