Sick of Drinking

[Joes_full]

Hi all. Im Joe and posted here a few months ago. I wonder if I really need to drink anymore. I do like it sometimes, but the next day is not always so good. I know I should stop, but sometimes I think I just want to drink to let loose. I sometimes feel like I have fun when I drink and others think I am fun too. I remember one episode of Friends that had a guy, Fun Bobby, they called him when he was drinking, and then when he stopped, he was no fun at all. I guess I think sometimes I am just bored and looking for something 'fun' to do. But I always or most of the time seem to drink too much when I do. Anyway I maybe just need some kinda advice to help me think that I do not need to drink to have fun and just live life without drinking for a change.

Thanks, Joe

[Doggygirl]

Sick of Drinking

Hi Joe! I can sure relate to that feeling that I won't be able to have fun if I don't drink, and that I wont' be any fun to others. It got where I just had to quit because the consequences were getting just too much.

And you know what? I am just fine without drinking. I have fun. I laugh a lot with my new sober friends. I think they are fun, and they don't drink. They seem to think I'm fun and I don't drink.

This whole "drinking is fun" thing is really an illusion, I think. Was for me anyway.

Read a lot of posts around the forum and you will probably start to get a good idea of what you want to do.

DG

[BellaC]

Sick of Drinking

I remember the "Fun Bobby" episode! Keep in mind that they WAY overdramatized how dull he was when he got sober for comedic effect.

I didn't have a whole lot of "drinking buddies" since I drank at home as much as possible to avoid making a total jackass out of myself in front of people. I'm new at being sober, so I still feel a little awkward in certain social situations. But it gets easier and easier and it's SOOOO much better than waking up the next day and wondering what I said and did and to whom. And no hangovers. What a blessing.
Being healthy and true to yourself is much more important than being entertaining at parties anyway.

[mollyka]

Sick of Drinking

Hi Joe,
I would appear that with most people once alcohol starts becoming a problem it is hard to pull it back to 'normal' drinking, certainly my consumption just kept growing over the years and was not controllable towards the end. And yes, the fun part goes anyway when, as Bella says, we start drinking at home and alone, cos the 'social' aspect becomes too difficult cos we are afraid of how we will behave in public. I'm not saying you are there yet, but if you are worried, when we stop drinking at first the social side can be a bit tricky but with a bit of sober living our sober personality develops and yes fun is out there - 'sober' and 'fun' CAN be in the same sentence!
Molly

[hillsidetime]

Sick of Drinking

Hi Joes_Full, you ask some important and relevant questions for sure. To start, I think that media - through movies and videos etc, does complicate things for us. Rarely, is there truth to the images that we are given (in my opinion) and often they are designed to get us to buy stuff. Once we realize that we drink too much on thes nights out, the truth is out. It is not like on TV.

Drinking, for something to do, was also a hobbie of mine for many many years. It also was something to do for celebrations, after a long day, etc, etc, etc. Drinking can erode your time. It is amazing how much longer the weekend is, which is awesome, when you are sober. Drinking is not good for us, we know that. For me, I did it as a habit, as a routine, and it was slowly killing me. I am not sure if this is where you are at.

There are a great many benefits to going sober, but for me, it took at least 6 months of sobriety to gain perspective on the whole issue. Have you tried the 30 day sober concept to gain a little perspective?

All the best,
Hill

[Peacefull]

Sick of Drinking

I love living the sober life. I love the inner peace that sobriety gives me that I was always searching for in the wrong places. I love that I can have a bad day and be okay with that and survive without a drink. I love that I can laugh without being under the influence of a drug which alcohol is. I love not having to fake who I am. I love getting to know the real me again. In fact, I never want to go back to drinking again. In a nutshell, it's just not fun to me anymore, and perhaps never really was.

Sheri

This is exactly how I feel. There is nothing better than a sober laugh...and the inner peace. I am the female version of Fun Bobby drunk or sober, so ppl are getting use to the sober me again. I am also and I love it.

[Dewdrop]

Sick of Drinking

Just jumping in to say hello and :welcome: keep posting and reading.

Dewdrop :h

[luke2010]

Sick of Drinking

Hi Joe ,
I am pretty new to this but instead of saying all the cliches like - if theyre your real friends theyll like you whatever etc... you can work that out for yourself

Drinkers hang around with drinkers, hanging around with people that can take it all leave it helps.....

I am going through the same thing at the moment...

But I am thinking , I never used to have to drink to have fun? when you were I young teenager , a kid , or young adult , (not sure when you started gettin really on it )

Bare that in mind , remember when you didnt have to drink, whats the reason you cannot go back to that ?? there isnt one is there - your brain is trained to think like this out of habit & it you / we need to untrain the bad habit of wasting your life , money, time/ health

Anyway I am not so sure that we are all funny after a drink , its an illusion , watch the street drinkers on the bench in a big boozy bubble of obilvion , theyre not funny

anyway thats way too much from me , i'm gonna get back in my box

good luck ! good to meet yer

[SoFlo1]

Sick of Drinking

Joes_full;968775 wrote: Anyway I maybe just need some kinda advice to help me think that I do not need to drink to have fun and just live life without drinking for a change.

I know exactly what you mean - how could life without alcohol be any fun at all? How can life without alcohol be anything worthwhile at all, really? Alcohol makes fun, funner, makes pain less painful, makes boredom less boring, it really is a cure all. Until it isn't.

When I had alcohol as the only constant in my life it became the way I chose my hobbies, my passtimes, my friends, everything. Are we going to a movie - is it a draft house? Should I learn golf - sure the beer cart even comes to you! How about fishing? Nothing better than with a cold beer. After a while I just started excluding activities that didn't involve alcohol and I did it for so long I couldn't even think about how you'd have fun sober.

The truth is that you can get to a place where alcohol is only relieving the boredom that it caused in the first place - that you limit your options down to only drinking related and all your sober options are boring because you've never really thought about them. The truth for me is that alcohol only made things more fun because it was fun to forget the bad things that alcohol was doing to my life. The truth is I've learned that most people make decisions about how they'll spend their time, who they'll spend it with and what they'll be doing based on factors other than whether or not alcohol will be served. Who knew?

You could not have told me these things a few months ago. If you did, I would not have believed them. I would not have believe it is possible to stop the cycle, to find out who you are and what you like, and to then make more intentional decisions about trying new things and having fun. You could not have explained to me what it means to be in a present state of mind so that you can actually experience the fun, remember it, learn from it, or just move on to something new if it wasn't fun. I learned I actually hated golf. Who knew?

So, just a long winded way to say what I would have liked to have known in beginning: don't worry about the fun - it's just what happens when you start to show up in your own life.

[luke2010]

Sick of Drinking

Nice one SoFlo , a great read

don't worry about the fun - it's just what happens when you start to show up in your own life

[fluff]

Sick of Drinking

Hey Joe- Welcome-
I just wanted to throw in my 2 cents here-On one occasion this summer, I was down at the shore with very heavy drinking friends- I was the only one that decided not to drink-AND -I still had fun-a lot of laughs- joked around - and I was also the only one who didn't pass out that night-and woke up to enjoy a beautiful seaside morning without any hang-over. Fun does exist without alcohol. Try it-you might like it!