Sober October Challenge!

[mollyka]

Sober October Challenge!

To be honest, I think that's my main problem with AA. I'm a middleaged woman and I think (like to think) that outside of a very small no. of people in the world, nobody has ANY idea that I have/had a drink problem. In fact, in my workplace most of them just know me as a non-drinker - full stop. Couldn't imagine being generally 'outed'! Pride I suppose, but I have found having 'pride' in myself a fairly new phenomenon, so, so be it!! I also feel that if you had that many doubts about next weekend you are prob right to cancel - I'm sure we'll all be wild social animals in time to come but - maybe not just yet
What an incentive for us to stay sober Peace - lets make a pact here and now, if we both stay off the bottle and we are still in touch here that we will meet up in Toronto end of June 2011 - I would love that!!
Anon, back to your point about people not knowing how much you drank - nobody knows or will ever know how much I drank except for the folk on here! Yuch
Molly

[choice]

Sober October Challenge!

Good early morning to everyone what ever time or day it is in the world where you are .

I also have been waking up at 5 am lately. But I have been getting sooooo much done and feel like NZ is really starting to feel like home. I missed a few days on the thread and I swear it's taken almost 45 min to catch up. I do not know where to jump in. Congrats Dewdrop in the 60 days!!! Also, I am so envious of the meet up. I would have loved to have met up with you guys :l

Peace, I think canceling plans is getting easier for me then it was in the beginning. It doesn't mean you'll never see your bud again in the future. Possibly you've just got a lot going on in your life at the moment and need to re-schedule for another time in the future? I think sobriety is a lot of work and the effort and time that I put into it is my business. No one knows how hard it is to say NO sometimes, only me and the mind games I play with AL. On the other hand, there are always going to be situations where we will have pressure. I'd canceled an event about a month ago were there was going to be heavy drinking, had the flat to myself, logged onto MWO for support and saw tons of slips..... I saw it as green lights to drink. I didn't because I figured out that at the end of the day, I was trying to use my computer as an excuse, and was just looking for any reason.

ALL major head games I was personally having with AL. I learned a ton. I didn't even know at that point that I use to drink when I was lonely. Good luck with your decision to go or not to go. I'm sending my support on whatever you decide. I since a victory for you either way!

:goodjob: everyone!!! WOW October is almost to an end :h

[mollyka]

Sober October Challenge!

Hi Choice, great to see you! I know what you mean about the 'head games' and the 'stories' we tell ourselves. Something I found very very important to know were my triggers. Mine are WIERD, about as sensible as this whole frigging disease is! - I find that I've got through the really big things in my life sober, bereavement, birthdays, holidays, christmas only to feel (in the past I hope!!) 'oh I got through that - bloody well done, now I deserve a drink'. I actually recognised that in myself today a little bit, was a bit anxious about the meet-up yesterday, thoroughly enjoyed myself, but found myself a little restless today and realised it was that little thought creeping in - bizarre! Luckily just drank too much coffee and some choccie biscuits and got over it! Banging frigging headache from the coffee tho
Molly

[Peacefull]

Sober October Challenge!

Ok, Molly next June it is. It is beautiful here at that time of year as well....

Just a quick check in before turning in, had a great weekend and am now tired from all the driving. Had dinner with hubby and friends and now going to start a new book with my full tummy.

Thanks everyone for your great advice, I agree that it is too early to put myself in a situation where I am the only one not drinking. It's not fair to my friend as well....it would be totally different if it were a crowd of ppl not just the four of us yet.

[Hippy Chick]

Sober October Challenge!

Hi guys.
Just thought I would pop my head in and say hello.
Glad to hear everyone is doing well.
Molly - I bet you cant wait til your daughter gets home. It will be lovely to see her again. I must admit after our emails on the weekend I too felt really envious of you being able to meet up with all those lovely people. Next time take a photo so I can put faces to names. (Email it).
It really made me miss this site and all the friends I have met here. I dont have that many (real) friends so I really do treasure my virtual friends.
So maybe I need to hang around abit more than I thought I did.
Keep strong.
Hip

[mollyka]

Sober October Challenge!

Aahhhh Hipster Girl GREAT to hear from you here!! I have soo missed you - maybe just dip in once a week plllleeeese:l. I consider folks here my friends too,cyber or in the flesh, everyone is really important to me, was rushing me housework this morn so I could check what was happening round the boards!! Can't wait for Bells (her nickname, don't worry) to get home, she has plans for every day she's here - thankfully cos she's a girl loads of the plans involve me - a few wine parties, but I'm ok with them - most of them are her friends and her friends Mums who I've never had drinks with before so they won't blink when I order my fizzy water!
Right Peace - June it is - deffo gives us something to work towards if the old 'voices' come calling. Anyone else in the vague vicinity of Toronto??
Morning everyone else, it's a beautiful day here in Dublin, have the big windows opened out to the garden and am sittin half in half out - chickens are eyeballing me for treats so maybe will go and find a few grapes for them, don't know which hubs is more jealous of - My MWO friends or my chickens
Molly

[Hippy Chick]

Sober October Challenge!

Maybe I could start saving and make sure I am in the vacinity of Toronto!!! I have ALWAYS wanted to go to Canada, maybe I could plan "me" time and meet you all there....... hhmmm, worth a thought.
xxxx

[mollyka]

Sober October Challenge!

Get your ass in gear girl - Peace will tell us the best restaurant to meet in:H:H
Molly

[anon]

Sober October Challenge!

G'Day Hippy Chick nice to see you again!
How is Perth? When we were there a few years ago we heard more British accents than Aussie ones.
You sounded a bit lonely are you ok? I know what you mean about the virtual friends as it is good to be able to tell our secrets in a safe and non judgemental place.
Mind you a few years ago when I first joined I was welcomed and made some progress and then some guy from the States was nasty and slammed me in a post and it really put me off and I lost my confidence in MYO. He did apologise later when he sobered up but it put me right off this site.

Anyway I have only met good sense, good advice ,support and lots of laughs since coming back and have managed to be sober for longer than I can remember even with a few (2) slips I have not been drunk or anywhere near it since 4th September 2010 and feel so much better.

Would you not come back to scouse land for a visit only a short journey across the world!

[mollyka]

Sober October Challenge!

Wow Anon, you were amazing coming back after someone being nasty. I'm awful sensitive, don't know if it's the alkie in me or that's just the way I am, but if someone says boo to me or I even think they might I run away and cry - actually I used to run away and cry and get the bottle out:duh:, I feel much braver these days tho. I'm glad you're having a better experience this time round!!
Watching 'Sleepless in Seattle', never saw it before - sweet!!
Molly

[anon]

Sober October Challenge!

Ahh Sleepless in Seattle Wonderful film Molly.
Yes I was brave coming back knowing how touchy I am--But thanks to people like you I feel cared for not humiliated.
It is ok to take the piss though!!!

[Peacefull]

Sober October Challenge!

Hi everyone,

Well as for my ongoing saga over the coming weekend, I spoke to my friend today. Actually I initially canceled the get together and felt badly for doing so as we all were looking forward to it and then uncanceled. I did say that I would not be drinking and I do have a valid reason - pain meds - but she said, you will be drinking saturday though and I said no I won't be I haven't been drinking. We didn't get into it too much on the phone and I was at work. I will be totally honest with her on Saturday, at least there is no expectation of me drinking...what a load off.

We really, really like these friends and we don't get together often, drinking is always involved and we have had loads of fun together. Drinking for me is not fun anymore and they will see just how much fun I am without drink. I can't jeopardize my sobriety, it is what is making me, me again. My system just can't handle it like most people, the anxiety and self loathing is so very painful.

Thank you all for your support, I know it's tricky putting myself in this situation where I am the only non drinker, but I really, truly do not want to and am relieved that I said I wasn't drinking, it shouldn't be a big deal on Saturday now. Plus, my hubby is a wonderful support system.
:thanks:

Another hurdle in this journey, the more we get over, the easier it gets....

[mollyka]

Sober October Challenge!

I suppose the fact that you've told her you won't be drinking is nearly a safeguard, cos if you turned round after saying that and decided to drink you'd probably feel a bit silly - so go, have a great night and show the world that us sober folk can have fun too - I can testify to that after Sat. night! Also great to have hubs in your corner - not sure if I would be successful without my fellas unstinting and unconditional support.
Tom Hanks was cute back then alright Anon
Molly

[Hippy Chick]

Sober October Challenge!

Morning.

Hi Anon - Perth is the same as always. Had a very dry winter so it is looking rather brown and burnt already and it is only mid spring! You are so right about all the English accents around! The community I live in is nicknamed "Little Britain" as there are more poms than Aussies here..... Our town was shown on a documentary in England a few years ago and everyone saw how wonderful it looked. So alot of English packed their bags and moved here when the pound was very strong against the aussie dollar (not now though!). So they were able to buy fantastic houses and settled in rather well. Dont tempt me with travelling back to England.... I love it and would go at any opportunity. My step son's partner - they live in London - is due to have her second baby (to him) in a few weeks so we would love to get on a plane to meet Isabella when she arrives.
No. I am not lonely. I am actually doing really well. i am getting out of the house now (have a real issue with leaving the house, takes a huge amount of energy) and doing a few more things like (forcing) myself to go to social things, parties etc. I have never really been the type of person to go for coffee/drinks etc and catch up with what friends I do have. I get anxious about being away from home so feel the need to be in control of when I go out and where to, and how long I spend out. Which doesnt make for much fun for the people around me! That is why MWO suits me so well as I am in control of everything to do with it (from my side of the computer). And I can really think about what I want to say and even delete words if I need to. I cant do that in a real conversation. That is also why AL helped me so much - it gave me courage and the ability to talk to people and not feel so anxious.
Gotta get ready for work so bye for now.
Hip

[Spinning J]

Sober October Challenge!

Morning Sober October Peeps!
Hi HC . My Sis emigrated to Noosa Queensland in 2007 and loves it. I visited in 2008 and it was amazing!Would love to go again but the flights are so expensive! I really miss her as she is my only silbling. Anyway glad you are doing so well. I remember when I first joined MWO you replied to me on the newbies nest and made me feel welcome
I didn't post yest as I've been poorly ! Hubs is worse tho so can't complain! Hi Anon, Peace Molly and all the gang. Have a great AF Tuesday. xx