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    #1

    Day one again.

    Just finishing day one, again, after last night's binge.

    We were already committed to going out to dinner at a local pub with friends, but I said I would drive and did so. It was a bit difficult watching everyone drink at first until they started getting loud and a bit obnoxious. I did feel like going to the bottle shop on the way home but made it back without stopping.

    I really can't have even one. The sooner I can accept that, the better.
    CW


    One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind.
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    #2
    Day one again.

    Hello, I'm starting day one again myself. Hopefully for the last time. I feel sick and tired and afraid that I'll never get control over this awful disease. I hope I can this time around. So here I am joining you in day one again! I agree with you that I can't have "just one" and I need to accept that and move on with my life!

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      #3
      Day one again.

      Charlotte's Web;1011522 wrote:

      I really can't have even one. The sooner I can accept that, the better.
      I really struggled until I FULLY accepted that, 100%. As long as I was 99.9%, I was just a relapse waiting to happen.

      I also encourage you to think about your social schedule, at least for the first several months. There is a saying I like. "If you spend enough time in the barber's chair, eventually you will get a haircut." I HAD to just stay far away from AL for a long time.

      Congratulations on a successful Day 1. That's the important thing - you made it. The suggestions are only that - suggestions based on my own experience.

      Strength and hope to you on Day 2!

      DG
      Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
      Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

      One day at a time.

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        #4
        Day one again.

        I hear ya. I can't have just one. It's a fact of life for me. It sucks, but it is what it is. How I wish I could drink like people without the problem, but I have to suck it up. With my personality, I seriously doubt that I will ever, ever be able to moderate.

        Great that you are starting over - just make a plan. It's the only way, at least for me. Keep busy, get the AL out of your house and as Doggygirl said, you need to COMMIT. It is totally worth it. Good luck to you friend!
        February 27th, 2013. A New , Successful Start. :h

        When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top!!

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          #5
          Day one again.

          Thanks DG for reminding me that 99.9% is not enough. And Wagon, it's true, it sucks and it's just the way it is! I have finally accepted I have an addicted brain that will try everything to convince me I can moderate even though experience proves time and again it's just not true!!

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            #6
            Day one again.

            Hi Mylife,
            I am new here, too, just finishing up Day 8.
            One thing that helped me this time around is a book called The Easy Way to Stop Drinking by Allen Carr. It has helped me immensely to see the drinking from a different vantage point. I know many others on this site have benefitted from it as well. It was the thing that helped fill in that extra .01 percent to bring me to the iron-clad certainty that DG mentioned

            Welcome aboard :welcome: !!!
            "No matter what happens, be fearless!"
            Sam - AF since 12/11/10

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              #7
              Day one again.

              Good comments from all....

              DG - I understand that staying in is the best thing possible but I think that may be a bit difficult in the run upto Christmas. Maybe I've chosen the wrong time to quit but I just can't go on feeling like I do. But I am going to make every effort to drive, to play with the children at parties instead of drinking with the grown ups and so on. Luckily, within our group a few people don't drink AT ALL and I want to become one of them.

              I've actually been trying to quit drinking for most of this year and did well from Jan - Jun but then slipped back into old habits. Although I haven't been able to quit yet, I have had more AF days this year than I have for about 12 years. Each day is a learning curve.

              It's a hangover free Sunday morning here (a rarity) and I have had a great time planning Christmas with my family. We getting cards ready to post cards, we are planning food, digging out recipes and writing lists.

              Hangover free mornings are better than drunken evenings.
              CW


              One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind.

              Comment

                #8
                Day one again.

                Thanks Samatha for the reading suggestion. I plan to spend a lot more evenings reading, and obviously non-drinking books are a good idea at this point! I have seen a counselor who recommended the AA Blue book, which is good, but I feel it's quite dated...however the principles are still there.
                DG and Charlotte, I will do everything to stay sober, so if it means staying away that's not a problem for me right now. Christmas we have to drive, so I can use that to my advantage. I am so ready to be over this I'll do just about anything to make it a reality.

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