I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

[Cassia]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Sounds like you all have set boundaries and I can hear your determination in your posts! You will do well!!

X

[mylife]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Yes, Jenn, let's see how we do. I saw the post you were talking about on the Mods thread, and I don't think "drinking a little every night" will ever be my definition of modding. I hear it works for the French and the Spanish though!

The hardest thing for me is there is so much literature saying that Modding is impossilbe, it's hard to overcome the negativity of all that to begin with.

Good luck with your therapist Sharky, and remember they are there to help you. You will feel better tomorrow if you don't drink tonight.

Cassia, thanks for the positive word of encouragement.

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Mylife, it's not just the literature it's the mod threads on here. There seam's to be more problems on the mod threads than on the AF threads. Most people who mod either over do it monthly or just give up and drink daily from what I read. That, more than the literature, or maybe combined with the literature, scares me. I want to see some one who had an original plan that stuck to it. You know?

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Have you guys looked on the Moderation Management web site. I know they have forums as well (I have not gone on them). They recommend drinking a maximum of 4 days per week and no more than 4 drinks per night at a rate of one drink/hour. The 4 days is not a problem (I think that is alot of days), max of 4 drinks is a problem for me. I know with my therapist it is all about having a plan and stickig to it. We had even drawn out a plan prior to this weekend (i knew it was going to be a problem weekend) I did fine the first night but blew it big time on Sat and Sunday. I gave up on the plan which was my fault. I am learning that I can't always trust myself and that scares me as well. For me the next few months will be critical to determine if I can mod or not. Need to string some AF days together first and get my head back in the game......

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Sharky you might want to try telling yourself that when you blow it stop, even if it's just one drink over just stop then and cut your losses, like gambling, just because you messed up for one decision doesn't mean you can't walk away still holding some chips you know. I am such a screw up, or was in my teens and twenty's, so I am very familiar with the "ok we fucked up lets really fuck up and have some real fun, might as well make it worth it" you can change your thinking though, "ok so I just started to fuck up. . .let's stop now that way we minimize the damage" when that works a couple of times it gets easier. You can do this. Try to figure out how much is to much and stop one drink short of to much and poor the rest out! That is the key for me, stop and poor, cause I will finish that bottle. Don't kid yourself just stop and poor! You can do this, we are here to support you.

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Appreciate it Jenny! You guys are the best and I really do like our little support group!
It definitely helps the journey! Stop and pour... I am going to utilize this.
Thanks again Jenny

[mylife]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

I have to say Sharky, Jenny is right. I have stopped and poured many times, even when I wasn't consciously modding. I would tell myself this is how much I will have (usually 3 glasses of wine) and I'd pour the rest down the drain as I poured the 3rd glass.

The other reason they say one drink per hour is you don't get so drunk that you think "whatever!" I would recommend drinking something between the drinks like water or soda to slow yourself down.

Just some ideas. I think our support group is great also. I'm planning NOT to drink tonight or any nights this week so lets see how this goes. !! If it becomes harder than abstaining I might as well just stop drinking -- you know?!!

I will check out the moderation management web site again as well. I would like to hear some success stories with it!

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

MyLife-
I am not going to drink tonight or the rest of this week. I have a work/client dinner on Wed and I may be in a position that I will have to have a glass of wine. If that is the case I am only having the one glass. I would like to make it through the weekend as that always seems to be a mental hurdle. Will start by going to the gym tomorrow and getting my mind back to a positive attitude...
The modding my be a tough challenge for me as I tend to drink (everything) very fast. Need to mix in water if I do mod. Appreciate the advice!:thanks:

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

We're doing great guy's, we're hanging in there! You can do this Sharky! Wondering how would you have to have a glass? I want to check out the mod website also. I'll jump back on tonight. C ya later!

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

I am going to try and avoid it but these clients are used to seeing me - happy, fun, drinking....Kind of the ringleader. I'm concerened that if I'm not drinking it will cause concern, questions etc... I could explain it away I suppose but it may be easier to limit myself to 2 drinks for the entire night (attempt to mod in a planned out way).
Let me know what you found out on the Mod site. I've been attending some Mod Management group sessions as well and definitely enjoy them. It is nice to have some folks with the same goals that we have.
AF today!!!

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

If you don't want to drink could you put something else in the glass that looks like wine, sparkling grape juice or maybe have some virgin mixed drinks so they wouldn't know the difference. Just a thought.

[mylife]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Hey guys. Well it wasn't too hard tonight not to drink. Actually, it didn't appeal to me -- but it's only Monday. In a way it's nice to have in my back pocket that if I want to I can have a couple drinks this weekend. Actually it feels really good not to be drinking tonight. I'm looking forward to reading in bed and good nights sleep.

Sharky -- with the glass of wine thing -- get something you really can't stand (for me that would be a glass of Rose) and a glass of water too. Keep drinking lots of water and pick up the Rose now and then and just twirl it around at dinner and keep refreshing everyone elses drinks and take a sip now and thenn (and try not to gag!). If anyone asks say you're fighting a migraine or something -- too much work is always a good one.!!

Have a great night guys and I know we'll all feel good and hangover free tomorrow!

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

I'm with you ML, it feels good to be AF tonight, and to know that I can have a drink or two this weekend. I watched two and a half men tonight and Charlie just looked like a drug addict. Odd I've never seen him in that way before. I hope he gets better soon! I love that show.

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Good morning guys, day 3 and I feel good! Huh how do I count now? I guess I can say beginning of day 6 for feb or 34 AF days in 2011 or 34 out of 39. Or this is my 3rd sober day this week. Anyway point being there will forever more be more sober days than drinking days! Have a great Tuesday, we're in for more weather tomorrow! Ugg!

[mylife]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Good morning!

It felt great to wake up this morning after not drinking last night. It really wan't hard at all to not drink last night -- I hope that stays with me during all the weeks to come this year. I think slipping into "I'll just have one or two each evening" will set me up to be right back where I was. I'm hoping against hope I just need to form the new habit of not drinking during the week, and I'm not an addict in denial! Oh well, time will tell!

Have a great day guys!