I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

ML I think that is my wish too. I hope I'm not an addict in denial. Only time will tell. Hey Sharky you out there today? How are you feeling?

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Hey guys-
Feeling much better on Day 2 but still can't shake the anxiety. Time should heel that I hope. Went to the gym and that helps. On the road again tomorrow.....MyLife- if I had a Rose I'm not sure what i would do I like the idea of just having the glass a swirling it around!

The addict in denial is interesting. Just when I think I have my confidence and do well for a couple nights, I manage to blow it..... Are we that much more aware and simply didn't care before? Not sure.
Have a great AF day !!

[jenniech]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

totally relate

hey! I have been reading your posts and man, can I relate!! This is day 6 of AF . .. that is the longest I have gone without a drink in over 11 years (last time I was pregnant).
I too have client dinners all the time. I haven't had to do one AF yet but it is just around the corner. Plus, I am going to visit friends in a couple of weeks and they are big drinkers....I have come up with a plan...I am going to tell everyone that I am training to run a marathon or something like that. Or, maybe I will just say I am trying to lose weight. It is hard to argue against that vs. them trying to convince me that one drink won't hurt.

I too drink very fast....and the water in between helps a bit but I tend to guzzle that as fast as possible so that I can get that next drink so not sure that really helps. I need to be AF for a while and then I will try to mod.

:new:

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Jenniech-
Congrats on Day 6. Big accomplishment! I have been able to do several events AF - for me alot depends on the situation - big event, small dinner etc. I've found that most people have been super supportive - my first excuse was I was doing a "30 day cleansing", this worked. Driving is another good reason. I am usually good in the work environment (usually)....I just hate having to think about and the mind games it presents.
Want and need to string some AF days together.
You can see by this thread that MyLife and Jennyeric, MM (and others) have been on a similar path and check in almost every day. The support is fantastic!! Please join is in our journey!
Good luck with the Marathon! Now that is a lofty goal!
Day 2 AF

[mylife]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Hang in there Sharky. We're on the Moderating threads also.

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Hey Sharky how did it go with the therapist? What do you suppose the anxiety is from? Not drinking or trying to not drink or the traveling coming up?

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Jenn- Not sure. I always seem to get overly anxious after coming off a big drinkinng weekend. Guilt etc. I've also suddenly found that my BP is sky high. I have read that BP does rise when one stops drinking - not sure. I think I'll be OK once I get some more AF days under my belt. have a group Mod session tonight so that should help.
I also tend to internalize all my thoughts/feelings and don't communicate them to my wife so things tend to simmer. I joke around alot but never express true feelings, or communicate my thoughts. She will get mad at me but all the time and I tend to ignore it and not face the issues (usually drinking).
Anyway, i need to string some AF days together before even considering moderation (ultimate goal). The set backs are not a good sign. Again, I feel that I might be being overly critical of myself but I suppose better that than not caring:thanks:

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Your tendency to internalize and to joke around but never express true feelings or communicate thoughts, and that you tend to ignore that she is mad. . . .that is not a drinking thing. . .that is a guy thing, like girls have pms, guys have that. The funny thing is that I didn't think y'all were aware of it. Also I find it get better as you get more AF days. Don't fret you'll get there. I have horrible anxiety, with or without AL but I will not take meds, when I was little my mom just said we were nervous and that I what I think it is. I just deal, when the situation goes away the nerves go too.

[Sharky]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

I learned that from the therapist!:H

Very true.. Also you are absolutely correct, the more AF the less anxiety. Back at it!

[jennyneric]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

well I'm indulging tonight, I'm having a coke and a cig. LOL big time for me! I stopped drinking cokes 10 days ago, oddly it was easier than AL even tho I've been drinking those way longer. I have to have caffeine in the morning tho so I drink caffeinated Crystal light now. Well just checking in, hope everyone is good and AF tonight!

[RedJib]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Ditto what Sharky said. Talking about feelings is very tough for me, too. Gender thing, I think, as well as a lifetime of habit (I've always preferred to talk about thoughts rather than feelings.) And the anxiety I felt after a drinking binge was high as well. It became a bit of a spiral: drink, feel guilt/anxiety, drink again to relieve it, feel worse afterwards....
With more than three weeks AF now, I'm amazed at how much my anxiety has reduced. This is great!

[jenniech]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

what is a mod session?

I went to my first AA meeting last night and I must admit, I felt like they were all trying to convince me that I was an alcoholic. Yes, that is just a lable, but when I compare my situation with theirs, I am no where near the depths they sunk to before they got sober so I had a hard time relating.

I just think I drink too much but it isn't destroying my marriage, job, relationships, etc. So, I am now on DAY 7 AF and feel great!! I am digging this.....I think I will be able to moderate but will need help figuring out the best way to do that....

So, what is the MOD all about?

[madmans]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Hi Jenniech, everyone is different if i compared my drinking to some of my friends then i would not be here , there is always someone with a bigger problem, always someone who has destroyed more of their life than me . Eleven years ago i signed myself into rehab two days later i signed myself out because i could not relate to the other people there . I still was not happy about my drinking so i tried to moderate my drinking , some times it worked better that others . What i am trying to say is be careful looking at other people drinking/problems its how the drinking affects you, stay AF for at least 30 days then see were you are

[jenniech]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Thanks. . . I think I will do that

[mylife]

I'm starting my rest of the year sober challange today!

Good morning guys! Lots of activity on this thread during my night off!

Sharky, I completely agree with Jenny, internalizing is a guy thing. I think it's ingrained from day 1. I even notice it in my 6-year old nephew!

Anyway, I agree you should get a string of AF days together -- your posts were so positive and upbeat when you were AF. Red, Jenniech and MM good to hear from you guys!

I went to a class last night and then out to a dinner theatre for a movie with some friends. Everyone ordered wines or a beer and I just didn't feel like it so I didn't although that would technically fall under my "social occasion" rule. So, I had a glass of water and no one even noticed, and I felt great about that.

Jenniech -- I wish I could say what a Mod session is. I'm trying to figure it out for myself because there is very little support out there for modding. Probably with good reason but I'm the type that has to check into it for myself. I also went to AA and had a real problem relating, but I agree with MM that you have to listen to your problem internally and try not to compare with others. I think it's because most people don't go to AA until they've had serious problems - lost their families, been in jail, etc. but they were probably at our problem level at some point in the past...

Well, have a great day all. It's Wednesday so we're halfway through the week!