Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

[Choochie]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Hi Everyone - hope everything is going well for you all.

Sarah - hope the hubs was ok and checked in. Jen, you won't have to work so hard eventually, so just hang in, Molly, I hope you can find a solution to someone watching your critters while you're gone. I always have this problem because I have animals too. Usually hire someone to come over every day - maybe you can get a neighbor?? Korlan, your sleep will even out. Mine is the best of my life.

Have a wonderful AF day everyone - Dew, Wagon, Choice, GH, Peace, Anon - anyone else dropping in - I go to my second AA meeting tomorrow and am actually looking forward to it!

xx,
Choochie

[mylife]

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Good morning everyone! Made it to day 14. I had a close call last night, but I made it through AF. I think traveling away from home must have triggered something. Anyway, I'm back home tonight and praying for a sober weekend.

Choochie, let us know how your 2nd AA meeting goes! Maybe starting back out once/week might be doable for me. Our women's meetings are Weds nights -- maybe I'll go this week and see how I feel about it again.

Have a great AF day all!

[Choochie]

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ML just responded to you on another thread. I'll be sure to write about my AA meeting - will probably post on the AA thread. So proud of you for making it through your rough spot last night. Awesome!! I hope you'll think about trying your weekly AA meeting. I consider it insurance. I'm doing well, but I want all the bolstering I can get!!

Big congrats on 2 weeks!! Just two more to go to reach your big milestone!!

xx,
Choochie

[mollyka]

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Hi Chooch, Mylife , Jenny and all the other folks who obviously have more interesting lives than me:H. Well done coping with temptation ML - it really does make you stronger - noticeably so, every time you conquer a situation. I too will be interested in the meeting Chooch.
Went to my counsellor and told her how down I've been and it was lovely to be able to offload, did a lot of weeping and feel absolutely exhausted but she cleared my head quite a bit. I'm going to try out a depression support group she told me about, and am going back to my doc to talk about my medication and I'm telling hubs not to be an insensitive sod anymore --- so there!! Then I went shopping and spent heaps of money that I don't have and feel ok!!
Am going out for a bite to eat so will check in again later.
Molly

[Choochie]

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Molly - just wondering if you know the source of your depression or if you'd care to talk about it here? You always seem so upbeat, I don't get a sense of your sadness.

xx,
Choochie

[choice]

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Hi Everyone,

I am so impressed by the AA goers! I'm almost there myself. I'm really looking forward to going. I honestly don't know what I would have done if I hadn't found MWO. I probably would be still drinking and miserable and still not connecting the two. I had a bit of hick-up with my fiance Thursday night. He hasn't been drinking either, he'd hit some 40 odd days and I was feeling really hopeful that we were going to be alright and be on this sober path together. Anyway, he had a Christmas dinner Thursday night and came home with beer on his breath. He wasn't drunk and the only reason I would have known is that since being sober and off smoking, I have a nose like a bloodhound.

There is no doubt in my mind that my fiance is an alkie I've posted about his problems with AL before. He said he only had 3/4 of a beer and he felt uncomfortable and ordered a diet coke. I believe him but I was uncomfortable with his attitude. Like it was no big deal. It was a big deal to me and I'm not ashamed to say so. He didn't know it but that night I had one of my worst cravings yet when I ate dinner alone at a restaurant. When he came home and I smelt the beer breath, and remembered what a mess our holidays were last year with both of us in a drunk haze.... I felt tired of being vigilant. I was struck with the worst craving... and it wasn't for a glass of wine it was for a bottle. It scared the living crap out of me. Thank god I do not keep AL in the house! We didn't fight, we talked about it as best we could. But I went to bed worried. And woke up worried.

The next day I decided that his drinking has nothing to do with me, but my sobriety comes first over everything else. The only way I can be with this man is if he does not drink full stop. We are both addicts of AL and it is just too hard for me to be around him if he is going to use even casually. He is not a normal drinker and I know that he needs to keep the door shut. More importantly, putting myself and my sobriety first... His use- any use of AL weakens my resolve. I wish it didn't but it does, that's not his fault, but non the less... I can't be around him if he is going to flirt with 1 drink, 2... whatever. I'm stronger then I've ever been and I just know that this is a weakness in me that I must take serious.

I don't feel scared about feeling this way. I love being sober because I love myself more and feel that I deserve to thrive in my sobriety and not be constantly challenged by an addicts mind games. When he came home from work the next day I was really proud of myself because I was able to verbalize these thoughts to him rationally. Oddly enough, he said he wanted to give AA a go! AA?? I had no idea he was considering this. I'm happy and hopeful. I wanted to go to AA and it will be nice to go with him.

On a side note... my mother has opened her doors to me if I should decide to call this engagement off due to anything that would affect my sobriety. I feel more loved then I have in so long. I like dealing with problems with a clear head it's much better.

Sorry for the long post, whew thanks for listening :l:h

[Choochie]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Choice, brilliant, honest post. Just wanted you to know that I understand everything you're saying. You are so smart to figure these things out now before you get any more committed with your bf. I think AA is a stellar idea. What could it hurt? I look at it as insurance. Like you, I really want to do anything I can that will keep me sober.

I'm just thrilled to hear your resolve. And, that your mother has offered you this safety net is absolutely excellent. You are really thinking, girl. So proud of you!!

xx,
Choochie

[shell775]

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:new:Hi Everyone, jumping aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh so day one for me. Had a few drinks last night but didn't finish the bottle for once, but definitely determined not to drink today. We are having in-laws over tonight so it will be hard but I am sure I will get thru it and feel so better for it. Off to kids sports this morning in the hot sun!!

Hope everyone has a great day!!

Shell

[Wagoneer]

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Choice - awesome! So proud of you! You are a strong woman and a great example for all of us. I am especially happy with your Mom's offer and how you are putting your sobriety first where it should be. Sending you strength and happy thoughts! Let us know how it works out!

[Choochie]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

:welcome:Shell. So glad you found MWO - it's a wonderful site.

Be sure to visit the toolbox under the Monthly Abstinence thread. There's tons of information if you take the time to read.

Sending you peace and strength,
Choochie

[mylife]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Hi Guys,
Hope everyone is doing well. Molly, I never knew from your posts you were feeling depressed. I'm so happy for you to be seeing a counselor and working on that. I think many of us have underlying reasons we drank in the first place, and once I'm more confident in my sobriety I intend to explore that myself.
Choice, I have to say, I am completely with you. I think I had posted earlier or on another thread that I could absolutely not get sober right now if I were even around a drinker let along another Alcoholic. I have to say kudos to you for having such great insight.
Hope everyone else is having a wonderful AF day -- I read and get something great from each and every one of your posts!

Have a great AF Friday evening everyone!

[mollyka]

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Welcome Shell, great to see a new face, and good luck with the in-laws, come back tomorrow and let us know how it goes!
Choice, I am so happy for you that you have such a grasp on where you need to be re. your boyfriend and all - sounds like he's pretty committed too, I really hope it all works out for the best.
Chooch - I'm not sure if I just HAVE depression or whether it developed a couple of years ago when I had a dreadful time with my sisters around the time my mum was dying, they bullied her and when I tried to stand up for her they bullied me and my hubs and children. I fell into a bottle and barely came up for air this year. I am taking a fairly mighty anti-depressant and am disappointed that I've spiralled down in the last week or so, but I'll deal with it - had a great chat with hubs while we were out for dinner and he really understands where I'm at now. I seem to either feel very high or very low - luckily most of the time I feel brillo! Enough about me anyhows - I'm absolutely stuffed - massive platter of mushroom burger and chips in my belly and an early night with my book looming and all is good in the world!!
Molly

[mollyka]

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Mylife - crosspost!! Spent half an hour composing that post - I sound such a misery guts!! How are you this fine evening??
Molly

[Choochie]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Molly - it's good to hear your explanation. Family stuff really can send us into a nosedive it it's bad enough. I had tons of that some years back. I'm so glad it's over - I would have a tough time getting sober if I were still dealing with some of my past stuff. So good to hear your hubs is now on the same page with you - a testament to always needing to have good communication!!

BTW, does your doctor know about the high/low swings? Just wondering if a medication adjustment might be in order??

Mushroom burger-----------yum!!

Big hugs to everyone,
Choochie

[Dewdrop]

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Goodness I am tired tonight, it?s been a busy week and Christmas seems to be rushing towards me. Its been nice catching up with my friends from Spain, they are thinking of moving back to the UK though as the economy is no better in Spain in fact they feel worse off. Seems like the economy problems are worldwide and it doesn?t really matter where you live.

They do drink an awful lot though which I?d never really noticed before; the wine is opened around lunchtime and just continues till bedtime. They are surrounded by vineyards and buy it by the jerrycan, funnily they brought me a couple of bottles of their favourite and they were polished off during our first meal (and I wasn?t drinking)! I?ve snuck away upstairs with the excuse of having to finish some work as they are starting to talk rubbish and repeat themselves. And while it has been good to catch up with them I will be so glad when they leave tomorrow, it has strengthened my resolve to stay AF having them here.

I?m looking forward to a quiet and peaceful Saturday and Sunday with my house back to myself. Anon I really empathise with you! Molly I know life has been a bit of a headache for you recently but it does sound like you are maybe turning the corner, you are such a supportive and caring person for everyone else just look after yourself first.

Dewdrop :h