Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

[mollyka]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Wow, Gettinghappy - maybe our bloke is a bigamist!! That's exactly what it's like and I'm 32 yrs married. I know for a fact that in the past, major escalations in my drinking happened when he went like that - like you say going around feeling sick to the stomach - I just find this time a bit unforgiveable cos this year he knows I am somewhat vulnerable - maybe they can't help themselves?
Thanks for the report on AA both of you GH and Choochie, I really think I might give it a go. Won't go in my local town tho or where I work so it limits things a bit - I know excuses excuses!
Tonight 'Mr fecking miserable old git' is due in from work about half seven and I'm throwing a chicken curry on the table then going up to bed with my 'puter and my tele and sod him - the worm has turned!!
Molly

[Dewdrop]

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Hey Molly sorry to hear you're feeling a bit blue, if it's any consolation I divorced my old miserable git and have never been happier - not that I'm saying that's what you should do. Just detach a bit from him and do your own thing when he's like that, it's his problem not yours. Anyway sending you a bug cyber hug :h:h:h:h

[mollyka]

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Thanks Dewdrop, you're dead right - not so easy sometimes tho! Youngest son is now stuck at work and the buses arent running and rings up looking for a lift - ok the buses aren't running cos of ice and snow and I can drive, I am sick to death of the whole frigging lot of them
Molly

[mollyka]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Youngest son now in taxi which I will pay for and will prob cost more than he earned all day and now he prob thinks I was drinking and that's why I couldn't drive!
Molly

[mylife]

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Hi All!

Having a good day so far. Peace/Moll, I have to say I can relate to feelings surfacing and the roller coaster effect as well. I keep telling myself that I am just having normal feelings that people experience, and whereas I used to drown them, I can now experience them -- good or bad. And I can definitely relate to the "pissy" husband. Mine does that time to time and it drives me NUTS! But again, I think it's healther to experience all emotions rather than try to block them with AL. Just my feeling for now and I hope it lasts.

Choochie -- golf great idea. And glad you had a good time at AA. My first meeting was with a Womens group as well -- it's easier to go in to that way, although after several months I preferred mixed groups. I went for about 6 months last year on the adivce of my counselor and found lovely people. The spiritual thing was not an issue in my groups at all either. Didn't keep me sober, however, I think that committment has to come from within.

Have a great day everyone!

[Choochie]

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Didn't keep me sober, however, I think that committment has to come from within

ML, I couldn't agree more.

xx,
Choochie

[Dewdrop]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Choochie I'm really glad that the AA meeting went well for you and I understand from the making sober friends point of view, it's something I will think about and keep on the shelf if need be. I must admit most of my friends are all fine with me not drinking now and seem to be quite accepting of it. I'm beginning to realise that I was often the one that pushed the extra drinking on many occasions, and all of my family are good too. I've also been making a new circle of friends with my meditation group and yoga classes and few of them drink much. I find the difficulty is at work functions as everyone there seems to drink to excess with the free bars. It is very much a work hard, play hard environment.

Anyhow I'm off for an early night with a book soon, reading Eat Pray Love and really enjoying it, and it's back to the work grind tomorrow.

Dewdrop :h

[Mazzie]

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Hi Sober Sleighers

How good is this - I have a day or so off MWO and come back to 5 pages!! Sounds like everyone is doing a good job saying ho ho no to the al. Day 14 for me today and defo don't want to go backwards into the bottom of a bottle.

To all of us lovely girls with those old gits we have been married to for yonkers - my old git said this morning that he was going to work now and would see me tonight. And I though yep, that's all he will do - see me. He won't talk to me, won't cuddle me, won't smile at me, won't look like he is pleased to see me and won't listen to me! I think they just get so used to us being around and being here they forget we are people! Anyway I have also found the Detachment Thread invaluable ...........

All this is learning to live soberly and deal with emotions soberly. Not really very easy.

I would love to reply to everyone but I have to go to work now. So be good all, cos Santa will know if you're naughtly or nice!!!

Maz

[mylife]

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Hello Sleigh riders! And good evening! Just got back from playing with my nephew and bringing my sister a birthday cake for her birthday. My hubby is in a mood as well, but he has good excuses with his health, so I let him get away with a lot. It definitely takes its toll, though.

I thought about Choochie this morning as my husband and I did some errands and went to breakfast and I bumped into 3 (not 1 or 2 but 3!) of my old acquaintences from AA. It's always kind of funny bumping into those acquaintances outside of the meeting! If I were to do it again, I might have chosen not to go right in my community, but on the other hand it opened my eyes to the sheer numbers of people who are out there with this problem -- in all walks of life!

[mylife]

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Chillgirl;1017281 wrote: Hi Mylife
I think you will find reviews on Rational Recovery under the reading section, I enjoyed it but Allen Carr's Easyway to Stop Drinking is still my fav. If you have a spirtitual interest then I can recommend Mindful Recovery.

Chill, to let you know I have ordered both books. Thanks. I had skimmed the Alan Carr book years ago when I first started "wondering if I had a problem" LOL! I think I'll give it a more serious read this time around. :thanks:

[choice]

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Hi Everyone! Just read through the thread, such good success!!! So many riders that I've enjoyed reading and now don't have time to really post much but wanted to say hello!

[anon]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Crack of dawn here. Been up most of night as cannot sleep. Went out to a chrismas dinner last night and drove back in freezing fog and black ice with 3 drunk passengers. What an experience!

Coochie I was fascinated by your experience of AA sounded like you fitted right in.

Molly I hope the ice/snow does not prevent you getting to the Doctors today. I hope you are feeling a bit better BTW my husband is not speaking to me now and sulking because I have been Mrs Grumpy!

Everyone seems to be on board and contributing loads and I have spent the night reading the detachment thread so thanks for directing us all to it! It really makes so much sense to me.:thanks:

[mollyka]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Morning lovely people with rotten miserable ol' gits as husbands:H:H - maybe it was them we needed to give up, not the drink at all(joking!!). Anon, not making excuses but I reckon Doc would be a busy bee on a Mon morning - everyone looking for certs etc., with the bad weather and flu rife etc. so am a bit more resigned to how I feel today, rather than necessarily feeling better, might leave it another day or two, sorry your fella being a shit as well specially with all the relations there - you must feel like running away? Actually I did that once for 3 days, best thing I ever did!
Choice, thanks for checking in, good to know you are happy and busy - good combination! Dewie, will you get into work today, still sounds fairly rough in Scotland?
Mazzie, you are right, all these things were happening when we were drinking and drowning them - now it is facing up to real life and certainly in my case realising that I'm not going to put up with it anymore - no more guilt to keep me in 'my place'!
Mylife, how did you feel meeting all those people? I would die, I think, deffo if I go to AA it won't be in home town!
Hi Chooch, I also agree, any previous time I felt this down I eventually went to the bottle, this time it is from within, and I KNOW that drinking would make things 20 times worse - I hate feeling miserable but on the other hand it's a great feeling that alcohol isn't in the equation
Morning all to come
Molly

[gettinghappy]

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Good Morning! Molly, it's seems that husbands are alike even in different countries:durn:, I certainly won't be taking his moods as personally because I really do think it's their problem, not ours. Right now he is in a happy mood, so whatever, I'll go with it. Back to the AA thing again, the first meeting was scary but then I felt this uncontrollable urge to spill my guts! And so does everyone else. Probably because it is anonymous and nothing you say goes past that room. I do talk too much when I get nervous, so that's not good. The whole time I keep thinking "Stop talking now, ok, stop talking...but I can't!):H Looks like a busy day today. Lots to do. I used to spend all of my days off planning on keeping enough booze in the house and not let anyone see it. I am still finding empty bottles here and there. CRAZY:nutso: It's easy to hide things from a drunk person! My family probably already found them. Hope everyone has a terrific and sober day!!:heart:Happy

[Choochie]

Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

Morning Everyone - feeling wonderful and loving my sober life. I'm always my most thankful for being sober in the mornings. This alone will keep me away from alcohol. So happy.

All my girlfriends with hubs problems - just part of life I guess - I try to create my own world. My husband is usually wonderful, but I still find my life works best when I do my own thing much of the time. Of course, I'm older and have been married quite a while, so that makes a difference.

Anon, would love to hear more about driving the drunks - what do you think it was about the experience that kept you from sleeping? Was there something unsettling about it?

Hope everyone has a wonderful AF day. I'll keep you posted on my AA experiences - or of course you can go to the thread. I'm excited about it, really!

Big hugs,
Choochie:hug: