Hop aboard Santa's Sober Sleigh

[jennyneric]

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good morning, where has everyone gone? I guess tis the season to really really busy! As for me, I'm not really busy until tomorrow, then it will be crazy for the weekend!

I jumped off the sleigh for a few hours last night but I only had 3 drinks and poured the rest down the drain and I'm back on a strong this morning. . .my sister asked me again to take her to the lions den and I didn't say no, that was a hard challange, next time I'll just stay in the car or tell her to ride the bus. It's a learning process right. . .but anyway all is well, back to day one for me but it's ok, each time gets a little easier!

Have a fab AF day all!

[Korlan]

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Afternoon fellow riders!

Hi guys, just checking in on the sleigh. Having a gas so far today... I don't know how I got things done when I was working - it seems I'm busy all the time! Jenny, I think you're doing tremendous; you are an inspiration to us all. You did make me question something, I know there are people on the forums that are striving for moderation - is that possible? I mean I would love to have a glass of wine with dinner, and then another to relax before bed. Can we do that or just other people?
Love to hear everyone's thoughts. I'm being steeping in the abstinence terror; but keep thinking that when I'm not depressed, maybe it's not that big an issue... wait now I'm just confusing myself...

All right guys - I have to hand over the reins for a moment... gotta dash(er) :H:H

Luv to you all from Karen & The Duke :l

[jennyneric]

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Some people can moderate (mod is what its called on here) but , as Choochie says, why would you want the daily argument within? I don't want to mod I want to not drink until I can drink "normally" and that may never happen. Last night was pretty "normal" drinking except for 2 things. 1) in order to stop drinking I had to pour the rest down the sink and wash out the bottle, I can't even just throw it in the trash cause I will be digging it out later. 2) I drank on a week night.

There is a thread called "just two glasses" or something really close to that, in that thread the mod thing is explained better that I could ever explain it!

I want to not drink until I can not care that I don't drink. . .then and only then I may be able to mod.https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...ses-46653.html

[sunshine_gg]

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Hello everyone!

Glad to see you back on the sleigh, Jenny! Yes, it is a learning process and few of us get it right the first time around. Although, I'm not entirely sure I can agree with 'it gets easier every time'.. which kinda flows into Korlans question...

Here is how things have gone for me:
After my first (numerous) attempts after joining here I finally manged to get my head in the right place and stayed sober for 8 months. Then I thought.. 'great, this really isn't such a big deal.. I will go to drinking moderately now'. Fine and well. The first time we went out to dinner and I ordered a glass of wine, I didn't even finish it. Yay me. The next time, an occasion rolled around I had maybe 1 1/2 glasses. So very normal of me. Yay, again. So, here and there I had a glass or two.. no biggie. Until I went to the store to get a bottle of 'my' wine to keep at home. Right. That bottle never saw sun down. Nor did the next 15 bottles. Not every day, mind you. No, I did take breathers in between. But the PATTERN was there again. The THINKING was right back to where it had been before I got here. Buy a bottle.. be plastered within 2 hours. Hopefully, there'd be enough time to sober up somewhat before anyone else got home.

That has been my experience with moderating. Over and over again.

Wow... that actually really puts things in perspective for me right this moment.

[Dewdrop]

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Jenni you?ve managed to have a fair few AF days this month so far so maybe you should concentrate on the total days rather than trying to string 30 together? Just a thought. I know that I can?t moderate, like sunni I know I?d be right back at square one, I think that I?d gotten too far down the alkie road to be able to save myself now from anything other than total abstinence. And you know the longer that I?m sober the less I want to return to any type of drinking my life is simply so much better without alcohol in it.

Another busy day for me and thank goodness it?s Friday tomorrow, was out at my yoga class and it is freezing cold out tonight it was -2 and dropping as I type. I?ve started another new book so want to have an early night with it and get an early start in the morning. I?m off to see how everyone else is doing on the other threads,

Dewdrop :h

[mylife]

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Good evening sleigh riders. I also ended a 19 day sober streak last night. Sorry to say I fell off the sleigh and had 2 glasses of wine. Can't even really say why -- I was just missing it and it was available so I did. I'm having a hard time getting my head around the "permanent" side of giving up AL. Like Korlan, I really wish I could mod! I know I would be successful for awhile, but eventually, like Sunni and Dew said I feel that I will revert to unhealthy patterns and that will be that.

Anyway, I guess I'll try to start counting sober days each month or something. I have a feeling it will be hard to resist New Years eve at this point...

Thanks for the great posts and advice -- I will continue to read and listen to advice here!

[Korlan]

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Thanks Sunshine - That really helps. It did sound a little less dramatic than what I hear in my meetings, and it's nice to know that if I slip, it's not armageddon. Having said that, it sounds that I need to try and stay on the straight and narrow until I'm ready.

You guys are fantastic and a wealth of information - bet you're glad you didn't go into the city today Sunshine!

Thanks sleigh riders!
Karen

[choice]

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Hi everyone, just checking in on the sleigh. Every time I think about moderation it stresses me out. I guess it was because I was trying to do that before I found MWO. I wasn't very successful. I could easily stop at a glass of wine at dinner most of the time. that wasn't my problem. I had a problem of sometimes getting a bottle of wine and drinking the whole thing. I think I could do that in two hours myself, or less. That was a concern. Also, and the main reason that keeps me on the strait and narrow is the blackouts. I can't ever risk having another one. It's just too dangerous. Also I'm worried that if I ever were to start again, I'm afraid I couldn't stop again. I think my problem with alcohol has just progressed to a dangerous level where I can't risk even one drink. I do wish I'd learned more about moderation a long time ago. Maybe if I'd learned then, I wouldn't have to abstain now. Who knows. All I can do is try and take care of my body and brain now.

[DJSUNNY]

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WOW I REALLY AM AN ALCOHOLIC!!!!!

hi everyone, im new here, ive been home from work all day due to a hang over trying to figure out how i got to this point and where to even start to change it....i think in the last 5 years the longest period i have gone without a drink is 4 days, i had just made it 4 days again but broke that run last night. i have 3 kids that i have got to pull it together for and i am slowly destroying my life with being a drunk! i cant even stand me anymore. i went to an AA meeting, not for me right now. i feel like such a failure right now and i know i have no more room for anymore shame in my life, so any ideas or a story about this first step would be appreciated.:new:

[mylife]

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Hi DJ and welcome. There is a load of valuable information here, I would recommend taking a few days off from drinking and read through the posts on this site. I think many of us are here because we realized we have a serious problem and we need help.

I'm pretty new myself, and still floundering around, but I will say I have found a lot of support here. Good luck! I'm sure you'll be getting a lot more advice!

[Korlan]

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Welcome DJ

Thanks everyone for all the helpful sharing, it really helps me look at what I'm doing and keep perspective. DJ - you're amongst friends here, we've all been where you are, and some of us are really still there - lots of newbies on this site, which I really appreciate. Itried AA last year and it didn't work for me. This time, it's a godsend. Whatever works for you is the right thing. Mylife is absolutely right, read through some posts, and you'll see yourself everywhere, it's amazing how similar we all are.

Stay strong everyone!

[mollyka]

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Good morning everyone and welcome DJ:welcome:. The first while going sober is a muddle of physical changes and emotional trauma. The good news is that very very quickly you can see massive changes - huge bonus that! Look it's not always easy, as time goes on it becomes easy an awful lot of the time, but this time of year is very tricky. I just posted in general discussion a tricky situation I found myself in and I was in exactly the same place as you are now this time last year. Settle in here - this site was in my mind yesterday when everything could have gone pearshaped - that's how important it is to me anyway!
Mylife and Jenny, I'm sorry you 'succumbed', back up on the wagon girls, that's the important part now, and as regards moderating and new years eve and stuff, my advice (from one who has been flailing around lately) is to make up your mind and go for it. If you give yourself ANY permission as such, you're buggered! Forget about 'permanence' Mylife, ODAT may seem like a cliche but it IS the way to think.
Sunni, thank you for your lovely honest posts - we are all battling - I took an antabuse for the first time in a year this morning! Talk later
Molly

[sunshine_gg]

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Good morning sleigh riders!

TGIF! Yay!
What is everyone up to today? I'll be puttering and working and hopefully getting some of those Christmas presents wrapped up. Looks like both my kids are going to arrive Christmas Eve.. so there should be 7 or 8 of us here for Christmas morning. Love it!

Well, have a fabulous Friday, all! :l

[mylife]

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Good morning sleigh. I'm back on the sleigh and feeling determined again.

Sunshine, great to hear you will have your kids back at Christmas time. Sounds like a lovely Christmas!

Hope you all have a wonderful AF day.

[mylife]

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Molly, thanks for the reminder. I don't know why I got caught up the permanence thing -- it just came over me and I didn't think rationally. I'll write it down to be better prepared next time.

Korlan, sounds like you are doing great! Keep it up. I'm mulling over Weight Watchers myself! It should be a lot easier without the calories from AL!