Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

[Pride before Fall]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

I agree with you about feeling free to post if we're discouraged or down, Sunny, although personally I haven't seen a lot of “happy thought” posts on MWO beyond people in the first days and weeks of sobriety.

I’d hope for more acceptance of honesty in responses, though, particularly when they aren’t mean-spirited. Responders should be cut the same “happy-thought” slack.

In the end, I think, people have different views on what's helpful. For some, it's being sympathetic, for others, it's going neutral, for others it's blunt honesty. There's very little outright meanness here, IMO, although a lot of frustration for those needing help and those giving it.

I think K9’s post was out of frustration. I’ve never seen her post anything that was deliberately offensive to anyone; in fact, just the opposite. But the posts did alarm me for new people.

There are obviously strong feelings about what’s appropriate to post and the right/wrong way to respond, so it’s clearly a conversation worth having. Thanks for opening it up.

Pride

[Pride before Fall]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

These days, I often find reading the boards to be a frustrating experience, as honesty and candor has been replaced with a lot of enabling and empty words posted in the name of "Support". >>

Thanks for stating it way more concisely than me, Kate. : )

[mylife]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Hi Guys,

Wow, I'm new here and this seems to be kind of a hot topic! Were posts better in the old days?
I have to say, that I was nervous to post when I had slipped in my sobriety attempt, but I thought I should go ahead anyway as there was bound to be advice out there. One of the other members said that others who had relapsed or decided to drink had stopped posting. So maybe that feeds into what you're talking about here?

Anyway, I have found lots of support and had my longest string of sober days in over a year here, so whatever is happening there is still a lot of good going on! I do feel that people should feel free to post good or bad. As that is what life is about and bad days will definitely come along, drinking or sober!

[fluff]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Look - it's like beating a dead horse...let it go....( also a good mantra for anything else bothering you...)
MyLife-great for you- keep on being sober...

[KateH1]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Actually, I have found this thread interesting. I think a good rule to go by, whether it be here at mwo or in life, is, if you find a conversation interesting or to your liking, join in, contribute, if you find it uncomfortable or not to your liking feel free to move on and join a different conversation. But, it is not appropriate to chastise or judge the conversations or thoughts of others.

At mwo there is something else to keep in mind. We are all here at different points in our sobriety or still drinking. We all need different things, and enjoy different types of interaction. That is why there are so many different areas of the boards. Everyone and their sobriety is important.

[sunshine_gg]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Well said, Kate.

And Pride.. I would also have to agree with you... responses that perhaps are a bit more honest and direct should also be allowed and accepted (personally, I would probably even invite them).

I guess, the bottom line really should be... If YOU want to share your struggles.. put it down on paper.. errrmm.. or rather up on screen - please do so. Yes, there may be responses to your post you don't like... or there may even inappropriate ones but you shouldn't let those get in the way of doing what YOU feel you need to do in your strive for sobriety.

I say, do what it takes. To hell with what anyone else thinks. Be a rebel

[mollyka]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Sunni and Kate and Pride, I agree with everything you say, and yes we are all in different stages of recovery and differing methods of getting there - doesn't make anyone wrong - just different
Molly

[Captainjack]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

What a wonderful thread so good to see Kate and others still here ..i agree K9 the road to success is to be completely honest with your feelings but keep that desire to be sober close..... go to bed repeating ..I want to be sober ..over and over and stay close to these wonderful people ...K 9 its boring but its wonderful if you get me drift stay sober
cap

[momof3]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

My most favorite posts are when people are honest and sincere in their struggles.

I think though that if anyone, including myself, posts something that is provacative, then they should expect some highly charged posts. I also think that when a person posts when they are drinking, have relapsed, or are thinking about relapsing, they will receive a wide range of responses; some they may not like. We have to accept the consequences of our actions and not blame another person for replying in a way that we don't like.

Alcohol is a serious and life threatening issue. Honesty can be painful and cause defensiveness even when it is delivered in the most constructive way. A brain that is addicted to alcohol does not want to hear anything that questions its need for alcohol.

M3

[Brigitte Bardot]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

M3, that is one of the best posts I have read in a while, thank you.

[dancelot]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Great post momof3!

[one2many]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

GREAT Post momof3!

I have NEVER seen anyone "attacked" or "judged" if they posted that they had a slip. I have, however seen them being asked what was next in their plan since the last one did not work.....that is constructive.

"There there" is not...

[Guitarista]

Posting 'Happy Thoughts'

Thank's for the thread Sunny.

I don't see a lot of happiness on the board's. I see a lot of folk's struggling, trying to come to terms with that, and posting honestly about it, or sometimes, the ongoing search for honesty from within is obvious. We can learn from respecful feedback.
But yep, being honest with ourselves is the way out.

Keep posting everyone. Great stuff!