First and foremost, I am and remained through this period alcohol free - thank God. Even though I was screwing around and dangerously close to chucking it, at some level I knew that drinking would porobably be the final nail in my coffin. What I did do, was find another way to forget my problems - that "smokable incense" stuff you might have heard about.
At first, it was great - it gave me escape, was completely legal, didn't involve drinking, and brought me back to the carefree days of my youth. As a married father of three in the midst of major life decisions, though, carefree and escape were probably the last couple of things I needed. I ended up isolating, slowly cutting everyone out of the picture, including my wife, just when we needed to talk to the most. Thank God she is a patient woman and had enough faith to just pray and wait.
Long story short, after about five weeks I wish I didn't put myself and my family through, I have a new-found respect for the fact that for me, this journey isn't about alcohol at all - it's about learning how to live no matter what life throws at me. I'd like to say there's no way I'll ever make escape plans again but for now I'm just glad I didn't throw fuel on the fire by drinking.
Anyway, I've been meaning to post an update for a while and like I said, maybe this will help someone else currently make plans to escape.
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