oh well.

[sulapeace]

u

[Zeppie2]

oh well.

Sulapeace - I am sorry you are having a rough time - you know drinking will just exacerbate everything you are feeling right now.

[Sunnyvalenting]

oh well.

Sulapeace,
1 year ago I was in a very similar place as you. I considered suicide but not actively. I just barely made it through the days I got to work in time to fall into a stupor with my drink. It was getting very bad. I had tried everything I knew and couldn't quit it. I was a successful 58 year old professional with a secure job. but I had already lost a marriage of 29 years and was quickly losing my grown sons and many friends. I know that my work was becoming shoddy and under quality as well. I just couldn't seem to make myself feel passionate about anything except alcohol. I gradually had gone from drinking around a life to living (smaller and smaller) around my drinking. My sisters were in a state of constant worry about what terrible thing would happen. One of them expected me to die this year.
Then I went to a clinic in Atlanta and was put on Baclofen.The rest is history. I have not had a drink in 11 1/2 months. I have lost the 50 pounds I had gained over the last 15 years. I no longer feel like the fraud. I can confidently say I don't miss the alcohol at all. I had dinner Christmas eve with several old friends, all of whom drink and had just soda without a care or worry. It can be done. Do it. You need to stop romanticising your relationship with AL. For me there was and remains NO up side to drinking ever. It is a myth that your addicted brain weaves so that you will justify further use.
Change the pronoun to " it" rather than "she". Separate from it permanently.
Consider getting help here or elsewhere.

[Sunnyvalenting]

oh well.

I hit send before I was done. But I want to let you know there is a way out which is much better than this death sentence you are carrying out.
Best of luck. May you see more clearly soon that you have options. It is not as hard as you might think. And time and sobriety bring clarity to the past.
All the best. And in spite of it all Merry Christmas
Sunny

[Sunnyvalenting]

oh well.

Guess I got the gender wrong, but it all still fits. I am a lady too
S

[Wagoneer]

oh well.

Sunnyvalenting;1028538 wrote: May you see more clearly soon that you have options. It is not as hard as you might think. And time and sobriety bring clarity to the past.
Sunny

Could not have said it better myself.

Best of luck to you. You are stronger than you think you are.