Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

[Longshot]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Bean;1031579 wrote: Longshot, I'm so sorry for offending you. That totally was not my intention. Like I said, I was not trying to be cruel or ignorant - just not sure how to interpret some of your post and clearly I got it wrong.

My apologies
Bean

Theres a three year old kid without a father, I'm not about to try and take any fucking positive out of this.

[Guest]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

The positive is that you are sober and able to have a decent go at getting through this time.

[lil.michelle]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Well done for staying sober. The sleep does get better, it really does. Just hold in there cause if you don't, you'll have to start at square one allll over again and that means the sleep deprevation all over again.
You're doing fantastic tho. Sorry to hear about the death in your family.
Stay stong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Guest]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

By the way I find it takes around 10-14 days for sleep to start to get back to normal, you just have to get through that initial bad period but it is worth it. A drink just puts you right back to day one.

[Longshot]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Well I'm here, and I'm sober.

It's 11pm on New Years Eve, I sat through the removal (2hrs in a room with the dead body, as a succession of strangers walk in, offer their condolences, including a particularly odious politician, a MP who I cannot stand). Then walking to the church, were I discovered I was a pallbearer, followed by half a catholic mass including two decades of the rosary)

And we bury him tomorrow.

2010 Can go fuck itself.

[KateH1]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Longshot, Good job on making the trip and supporting your loved ones at this very sad time. And even better, you are doing this without drinking. I can imagine how difficult this is for you on so many levels. I hope that you are able to get some rest tonight.

Wishing you Peace and Comfort at this time.
Kate

[Longshot]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

KateH1;1032156 wrote: Longshot, Good job on making the trip and supporting your loved ones at this very sad time. And even better, you are doing this without drinking. I can imagine how difficult this is for you on so many levels. I hope that you are able to get some rest tonight.

Wishing you Peace and Comfort at this time.
Kate

I know I should feel a sense of accomplishment it's my 8th day sober, but right now I just feel tired and empty.

[KateH1]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Longshot, It took weeks for me to begin to feel a sense of accomplishment when I went AF. The lack of sleep and the daily focus on Not Drinking, consumed me. I did feel relief each day not waking up hungover, but that was about it.....relief. Give yourself time, be patient and remember, you are going through a death close to you and that in and of itself will leave one feeling tired and empty. Just be kind to yourself and keep coming here and allow us to support you.

Warmest Wishes, to you and yours,
Kate

[Longshot]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Funeral done and dusted, now, I have to convince my wife to come home early.

Didn't sleep a wink last night, despite serious sleeping tablets, constant nightmares about being too tired to finish the job I couldn't finish up before christmas because I was too tired. And I thought I was tired then....

[KateH1]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Hi Long,
I am glad that the funeral is done. I hope that you are able to leave and get home soon. Have you considered looking into the supplement program or a variation of it mentioned in the mwo book? It is not a quick fix (there are none!) but it really, really helped many of us get through the early days of AF,me included!

Have a safe trip home.....your really are doing a great job! Be kind to yourself.
Kate

[Sunnyvalenting]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Longshot,
My condolences on your loss and problems. Adler said we could not get too depressed if we daily helped another person.
Sometimes considering the other person helps us put these things in perspective. We gain insight and live more gracefully. I am sorry for your loss and sorry for your wife who must go through this right now with a newly sober husband who cannot accompany her. She must be very concerned and rightly so as she trusts your sobriety even less than you do. She may be worried about your fate in all of this. Keep her close even if you cannot be with her for your valid reasons.
The insomnia is terrible, isn't it? I used melatonin 6 mg with 50 mg of benadryl on the difficult nights. Things are better now at one year of sobriety. I am still on very low dose bac and only occasionally need the melatonin.
May your 2011 bring you many joys and may fond memories assuage your loss. May you have much more to celebrate in the rest of this season.
Sunny

[KundaliniGirl]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Longshot, just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you. Sending you peace and strength.

xx,
KG

[choice]

Oh you have got to be f**king kidding me

Sleep deprivation is torture. I am amazed you've done as well as you have AF under such tragic circumstances. May you get the sleep you need to function soon. :goodjob: on being able to post at this time.