First, for myself: Links to My First Post and My Friends and Depression threads.
I am AF for three weeks, and it is for ME.
There have been times in the past when I thought it was for me, but honestly I think it was for someone/something else. It was because I "thought I should," or to try to win back my wife. Those things are still important to me, but I've come to the point where I am realizing that being AF needs to be a part of me, my identity, no matter what happens with any relationship or job or social status in the future. One day at a time, but this is something I need to remember every day.
This feels really good right now. The forum has helped make this a more personal quest. I really do believe I can keep doing this. I'm hoping there are no bumps along the way, but between MWO and a few AA meetings a week, kudzu, vitamins and simply staying out of the liquor store, I've avoided those bumps for three weeks.
And this, during one of the hardest phases of my life. (Well, actually it's no different than the past two or three years, but it has the capacity to get better when I don't drink!)
This morning I saw a brilliant post by Kimberley to Jewels83:
This reminder not only helps J83, but it helps me, too. It's another reason the forum is very valuable to me, and I thank you (Kimberley and all else!) for your words of wisdom, words that are unafraid to speak the truth in love. You've been there, you see our struggles, you help us as we help each other.
NOW -- if only I could quit smoking. (J83s post reminded me that I long for this, too.)
I've been smoking like a chimney since quitting AL. Do we have dedicated threads for that? That needs to be my next step. Why would I want to quit killing myself over the drink only to eventually kill myself over cigarettes? Not only that, but I feel worse after smoking a lot, it makes my breath smell, and it doesn't produce anything of value. Ever.
Peace, ya'all. You are still a great lift. :thanks:
I am AF for three weeks, and it is for ME.
There have been times in the past when I thought it was for me, but honestly I think it was for someone/something else. It was because I "thought I should," or to try to win back my wife. Those things are still important to me, but I've come to the point where I am realizing that being AF needs to be a part of me, my identity, no matter what happens with any relationship or job or social status in the future. One day at a time, but this is something I need to remember every day.
This feels really good right now. The forum has helped make this a more personal quest. I really do believe I can keep doing this. I'm hoping there are no bumps along the way, but between MWO and a few AA meetings a week, kudzu, vitamins and simply staying out of the liquor store, I've avoided those bumps for three weeks.
And this, during one of the hardest phases of my life. (Well, actually it's no different than the past two or three years, but it has the capacity to get better when I don't drink!)
This morning I saw a brilliant post by Kimberley to Jewels83:
Kimberley;1044410 wrote: Hi Jewels,1, You should always sort out your drinking completely and utterly for YOU. If others benefit or it improves your relationships then thats great, but make sure you know what your focus is. Otherwise, if you did split up, its so easy to just go back to drinking becasue your reason is gone for being sober. So keep your eyes on yourself rather than the prize if you know what I mean.
2, No relationship will ever work in the long-term if you are hiding things and being dishonest. I'm not saying you fess up and tell him all your drinking past if you don't want to (I do tend to do this though, for my own reasons), but you have to be honest with him in the here and now.
2, No relationship will ever work in the long-term if you are hiding things and being dishonest. I'm not saying you fess up and tell him all your drinking past if you don't want to (I do tend to do this though, for my own reasons), but you have to be honest with him in the here and now.
NOW -- if only I could quit smoking. (J83s post reminded me that I long for this, too.)
I've been smoking like a chimney since quitting AL. Do we have dedicated threads for that? That needs to be my next step. Why would I want to quit killing myself over the drink only to eventually kill myself over cigarettes? Not only that, but I feel worse after smoking a lot, it makes my breath smell, and it doesn't produce anything of value. Ever.
Peace, ya'all. You are still a great lift. :thanks:
Have a great day.
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