I've done half my list today, sober, and I have to admit that I miss that happy buzz, the anticipation of feeling warm all-over as I worked at and completed each task. It's clear to me that I've used AL for a long time as a kind of self-reward. Get something done, then have a drink. Did it really well? Great! I've earned another one.
I never really thought until the last couple of days about when this pattern started, but I'm sure now that it was when I was in college. I started late (years after high school), and had little confidence but fairly high expectations of myself. I'd study or write papers, and have a drink (or four) as a reward. If it got a good grade, it just reinforced my skewed thinking: AL isn't a problem, since a drunk couldn't do so well at this, right? Might as well have another one, and then start on the next project...
Doing life's day-to-day tasks has never bothered me much, and I'm not the procrastinator I was in my youth. Doing all the mundane stuff sober, though, this is something I have to get used to. It's kind of dull. I'm wondering how others have created new self-rewards, and how you may have adjusted to the boring times that are a part of all our lives. (I'm not spiritually-inclined; seeking more practical ideas and strategies). Thoughts? Tips?
Thanks,
Jib
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