What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

[Ronker]

Wondering what everyone seems to say to their social circle of friends to explain their abstenance?

My little girl asks me why I dont want beer anymore, so I tell her it makes daddy sick.

However not sure what to tell others?

[not tonight]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

Hi Ronker,
For me it depends on the situation. I was at the pub quiz night at my sone's school last Monday, sitting next to a mother who is looking for a drinking buddy. As it was Monday, and a school event it was easy to just say no. At diner parties I might make an excuse about work the next day, or that I want to go running early the next morning. I have never been comfortable with actually saying to people that I have (rather, trying to) give up drinking. For one thing I am a very private person, and this is very personal for me, also I feel that if I made this very private decision public everyone may start watching my behaviour. Number 2 with some people I worry that if I told them my plan it would spur them on to pressure me to drink. So for now I just take it one event at a time.

[madmans]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

I now tell people i don't want one, which happens to be true now. If they ask why i have told them i don't want to feel like shit in the morning. I know a friend of mine used the excuse that he was going off it for a month to prove to himself that he wasn't an Alkie and by the time the month was up no one asked any more and he stayed off

[Dewdrop]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

This is an interesting subject Ronker, in the beginning I used all kinds of excuses - I was on medication for a bladder problem, cystitis, urine infection so couldn't drink or simply 'I'm on medication and can't drink'. I wasn't feeling well, have a cold coming on, had a bad cold last week and am trying to get over it. Then I was on a one month detox - healthy eating, exercise and no alcohol for the month, I then went onto month 2 and after that told everyone I wanted to do 3 months and by that time they had kind of accepted that I wasn't drinking and it wasn't an issue. To be honest a lot of my drinking was done alone at home and I think it depends on the individual and their habits.

I wish you well

Dewdrop :h

[Bruunhilde]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

I think you can always say you're cutting sugar out of your diet, or limiting sugar. Alcohol is like jet fuel compared to table sugar, in terms of it's impact on your insulin. Any refined carbs are bad, AL is just the worst one. At least, that's what my AL soaked brain seems to have retained from years of researching. I wonder if it's true because if it was, you'd think it would be all over the news that AL is really bad for people with metabolic syndrome or who are struggling with full on diabetes. But it's not. Of course, that could be a anotehr lobbyist conspiracy.

[Kimberley]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

Hi Ronker,

It depends who it is, if I'm likely to be spending time in situations with them where there might be al around, how well I know them etc.

My friends don't need to be told why - it was obvious I had a drinking problem so they are just glad I have stopped. For people I don't really know and won't meet again, I just say I don't drink (adding 'for health reasons' if pushed).

For new friends and people who are likely to get close to me, I am mindful of being a bit honest, as I don't want friends I can't be honest with, and I say I don't drink ANYMORE. As a bit of a joke, I sometimes say that I was friends with Keith Richards and he told me to slow down...People get enough of an idea from that that you had a problem with heavy drinking withoug scaring them too much or making things awkward.

Having said that last week I was in a bar and these lads came up to us trying to chat us up and wanted to buy us a drink. When I asked for a diet coke, saying i didn't drink alcohol, one of them, who was obviously a bit of a dick, was like: "oh don't you want anything stronger than that - you're boring, don't know how to have fun" etc.

I felt my blood boiling, so i just said to him "Actually I'm a raving alcoholic and if i did start drinking I probably wouldn't stop and the night would pass in a bit of a crazy blur and end with me, you and your friends in a police cell somewhere. Do you want to have that kind of fun?" The look on his face - his friends were really nice to me after that and I got my diet coke

K x

[Change]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

Perfect excuse, if you feel you need one: "i'm trying to lose weight" whilst touching your belly!

[Ronker]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

madmans;1070248 wrote: I now tell people i don't want one, which happens to be true now. If they ask why i have told them i don't want to feel like shit in the morning. I know a friend of mine used the excuse that he was going off it for a month to prove to himself that he wasn't an Alkie and by the time the month was up no one asked any more and he stayed off

Hey Madmans! how you going good to hear from you again.

You see my other post? This is it this time!

[Ronker]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

Change;1070284 wrote: Perfect excuse, if you feel you need one: "i'm trying to lose weight" whilst touching your belly!

thats a good one!

[bugalugs]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

Ronker
This is a question that has haunted me over the last few days since accepting an invitation to a party tonight.
The fear in me says don't go!

However, over the last couple of years, I have isolated myself so I could drink!
I am not about to isolate myself so I won't drink!

I'll go to the party, but WILL NOT drink and spoil my 35 days AF.

Will try an keep it simple with "I'm on a health kick" (whilst patting the beer belly!)

[Sarasmiles]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

I've used the "health kick" line a lot. This week I'll be going out to a bar with some friends for a "girls' night out". This is very unusual for me...most of the socializing I do, which isn't much, is with my husband and kids. I've already heard the anticipation brewing amongst the women I'm going out with...moms who want a break and are looking forward to having a few drinks. I am planning on not saying anything about it; just ordering a seltzer and cranberry. I don't expect anyone to question me about not drinking, but if they do, I plan to say, "I've been finding I feel better when I don't drink".

[hillsidetime]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

Hi Ronker, man, this is a great question. What you tell your little girl, is great. You don't want one. My kids have already forgot about me drinking beer, and they know how much I love club soda now. So they ask me if I want a club soda.

Anyway, just so you know, I am not fully disclosed with my work people and aquintances - they don't know I am alcohol free. So this still happens a lot. I use a lot of lines like "not now thanks", "I have to watch my figure (than I pat my belly)". In addition, I just make sure I have a glass in my hand. I drink diet cola, or club soda on ice, and no one even asks me what I am drinking. Even at men's hockey tournaments, I drink water or gatoraid out of the hockey water bottle like the other guys (but they have beer in theirs). I used to think people would be all over me about this, and know what I am doing etc, but in my experience, it has not been a big deal.

I don't know if I am going to tell people flat out, I don't drink anymore - it is not really their business. Some people I say this to, some I don't. Anyhow, there are my thoughts.
Hill

[lolab]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

bugalugs;1070300 wrote: Ronker

However, over the last couple of years, I have isolated myself so I could drink!
I am not about to isolate myself so I won't drink!

So how did you do at the party bugalugs? I love this statement...so true. I haven't been in any social situations yet - (dead of winter here and only 20 days of sobriety) but I expect something to come up for St. Patty's day....(or maybe I'm overestimating my popularity - LOL) So I plan to use the health kick thing. My friends know I tend to try different workouts and that I eat pretty healthy, so it should work. They've just never seen me do it without the AL. heck, i did two rounds of P90X a couple of years ago, while drinking vodka daily....doesn't allow you many calories to fuel those workouts when you're using them all on Vodka!

[here4hope]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

No thank you works. I never understand people who pressure people about why they don't drink or anything else for that matter.

[RedJib]

What Do You Tell Your Social Circle?

I've observed over the years at lots of social events that people who ask and pursue questions about one's choice to abstain are often (nearly always, I think) those people who are struggling to figure out for themselves whether they have a problem. Anyone whose own AL use is genuinely not an issue takes no particular notice in someone else's choice not to drink.

I see that in myself, too. I'm waaaaaay more aware of who's drinking alot than are my friends and relatives who have no problem. In fact, that's one of the reasons I often flew under their radar when I was buzzed!

Jib