its been along time

[Beachbump]

its been along time

Professional help

Candy,

You need professional help IMMEDIATELY. You have to go and see a psyciatrist. You seem VERY depressed. You are rock bottom and needs HELP - this group is not enough. You have to reach out to some one near you. PLEASE. what are the possibilties?

[candycow]

its been along time

have to send the ins form in before i can even make a app the is only one place in town that takes my ins after they get my form than it will be 3 weeks appx to see some one i went to the doc tue and he put me on anti deppressants and gave me 7 amiben i had went 6 days without eating and hardly sleeping at least i have gotten some sleep
i know im depressed every time we go inthe car i imaging opening the door and jumping out but id probley fail like everything else in my life

[dancingon]

its been along time

I don't know about in the US, but I'm pretty sure if you mentioned to your Doc that you were having suicidal thoughts he could surely get you help. There are also drug and alcohol helplines, don't forget. I've never been one to advocate AA particularly, but in your case it seems like you might benefit from being surrounded by helpful people who won't judge you. It might help the loneliness too.

Your husband has a well developed sense of responsibility, but if you break up one day it's not the end of the world.

I have cared for people with wet brain, in a previous job and its not pretty is it?

As you said you may only be a dry drunk, but it's a hell of a lot better than being a wet drunk, and you can learn to live a productive and enjoyable life as a dry alcoholic.

[Beachbump]

its been along time

Hi Candy

How are you today? Please let us know. Agree with everything Sheri said. Also you are definitely depressed and need URGENT help. 3 weeks is to long to wait. You must remember - you HAVE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for what you did wrong. Yes, you cannot change the past, but youre effort in making it right and the WAY you handling and solving this problem, is the things that will give back your selfworth and the respect of your husband, kids and the community in which you live.

We all do horrible, stupid, dangerous and funny things when we are drunk - blaming it on drink, YES - but still - it is still our choice to drink and for that we have to take the responsibility. It maybe sounds hard, and I'm also preaching to myself with this, but I believe this is the only way. Stand up and make things rght!

[Beachbump]

its been along time

Stand up and make things rght!
Forgot to say - before you can stand up you need to nurse yourself back to health - with the help of professionals.

[vintage girl]

its been along time

Hi candi,

what's happened to you has been so distressing, it's no wonder you are feeling so down and depressed. But that was December and it's now almost April, and you can't go on punishing yourself. Yes, you lost a lot. But it could have been so much worse, and now you have your kids to think about.

They will be distressed by what's happened too, and they will need their Mum to help to make it better. So chin up girl, roll up your sleeves, you have a long road ahead and a lot of work to do, but everything you lost is replaceable. You are all alive, that's what counts. Sending you hugs and strength to go on, and please let us know how you are. :l

[candycow]

its been along time

im here but not much happy to say had leads on 2 jobs both went knowhere
i havent got anything nice to say

[dancingon]

its been along time

I'm tempted to say it's too early for you to be seeking a new job, but as a single mum I know that being unemployed is a luxury for some of us.
Be kind to yourself. Love your kids. In a couple of weeks if you stay off the booze and take the anti -D's you may start to feel more positive.