Tired of living this way!

[buffy]

I am an alcoholic. I have struggled with this for as long as I can remember. I drink till I drop. I love my family and want to be a good example, but I have failed misserably. My daughter is a drug addict, I blame myself for it. I know we all have to make our own choices, but I still have a deep feeling of shame that I have messed everything up. I went for a year and a half without drinking about 5 years ago and it was the best years of my life. I finally got weak with family problems and remember the day I said "Oh F it"!Everyone around me seemed to be having fun but me. Well, that was a mistake. I have gained a bunch of weight, my right side hurts, my family problems are worse than ever and I am tired of it all. I packed my bags yesterday and was going to leave but my son stopped me. I was drunk and was going to drive the car to my mothers house in another state. He took the keys away from me thank God! I am sober today and am going to stop this insanity. I need to do this. I want to do this, for myself and my family. My daughter is 24 and I need to be able to help her instead of feel sorry for myself and drink. I can't just have one or two. Please pray for us.

[Beachbump]

Tired of living this way!

Hi Buffy - welcome back...

My heart and empathy goes out to you - because 23 days ago I were where you are now. My daughter also had a drug addiction. She's 28. Last year she went to a rehab for 7 months. She came out and is fine - now she is supporting me - it is because of HER and the fact that I KNOW I am a lot to blame for her problems that I decided to quit. For the first time now I could admit to her that I've got a drinking problem and also my feelings of guilt about her problems - and she said she will help me. She organized a life coach for me and motivated me to get help on the internet because I don't live in a country where i can get help from ex. AA. I cannot fail her - she is so proud of me. You can do it too. Talk to your daughter. Admit to her youve got a problem (if you did'nt do it already) and ask het to help you - who knows? Maybe she will help you and you will help her! Please stay on this forum - and try not to drink today - tomorrow will already be better. Best of luck!:welcome::l:l:l

[sick of being sick]

Tired of living this way!

Buffy, you can quit drinking if you really want to! You need a good family to help you, to encourage and support you during this journey. We have all been where you are and I have been where your daughter is and perhaps I can help her. I was addicted to crack cocaine for 3 years, spent every dime I could get my hands on, lost about 50 pounds and was almost dead when I walked away from it. I would like to invite you into "The Journey begins here..." thread. I'm sure you know Ruby Willow and tlrgs (Roger). They are great supporters and encouragers and you can feel safe in there and share all that you are going through, without the fear of being judged or attacked! I wish you all the best and hope to see you there! Love, Vicki

[Reenie]

Tired of living this way!

I feel your pain Buffy. Please continue to read and post here on MWO. You are recieving a lot of great advice and support. It is helping me too. I have 14 days Al free. Alcohol has nothing but ruined my life. It's true.... You have to get sober for YOU first, family and friends will eventually fall back into place.

[Softy]

Tired of living this way!

Support

Everyone here is on your side. Good luck. But don't just leave it to luck. Use and rely on the MWO support network. 100 heads are better than one. Yes it will be tough but the folks here will get you through if you let them help:h:h:h

[mario]

Tired of living this way!

Hi & welcome buffy, keep reading & sharing your thoughts, you are not alone in this fight,we have/are all walking in the same shoes.give yourself a chance and stick around.

[buffy]

Tired of living this way!

Thank you for the thoughtful replies. It helps to know I'm not the only one going through this. The drug addiction problem with my daughter has me worried so much. I thought we were making progress and I found needles in her room again. I pray I don't go into her room and find her dead. I had to give her mouth to mouth recesitation about 3 months ago and called 911. She has been in a rehab. I don't have the money for any more rehabs. She won't work and lays around the house most of the day and is up all night. She wrecked her car and dropped out of college. I have two other kids that are hard working and thoughtful. All I do is worry about her. My husband wants to kick her out of the house but I think that will be the end of her. She went to work at a strip club the last time he told her to leave and her drug use got worse. Any advice would be appreciated.

[leaveinsilence]

Tired of living this way!

Buffy

Just wanted to say Hi and wish you well in your journey, every person here knows exactly how you feel right now and what you are going through, stay strong, take each day minute by minute and stick close:l

[mylife]

Tired of living this way!

Hello Buffy, welcome back. I'm so sorry to hear about the problems with your daughter. I wish you strength and peace on your journey. :l

[noodle]

Tired of living this way!

Hi Buffy, my heart goes out to you. As a Mum, I know how heartbroken you must feel, and how desperate your situation must feel. looking at it from the outside, the only way you can move forward is starting with yourself, you are of little help to your daughter if you cannot be as strong as possible for her. I do not say it lightly, I too am in recovery, and know the journey is far from easy, but trust me itr is possible, and within your reach. Use all the negativity and pain as a tool to banish Alcohol from your life, bear in mind all that hurt and pain IS the alcohol, that's why it's there in your past. You have the power to take it out your life, the power of removing it from your life is in your hands.
Your daughters addiction seems helpless, I agree with not kicking her out the house, she's beyond being shocked into sorting herself out, and her needs are desperate. When you are stronger, you can find every available resource possible to help her recover, and draw your family in to all help her get well.
The very best of luck on your journey, keep strong, XXXXXX

[free at last]

Tired of living this way!

Hi Buffy
You are in my thoughts and prayers. When the thoughts for "just one drink" come along, surf them like a wave. They will recede. Stay strong for yourself.

[sick of being sick]

Tired of living this way!

Buffy, the sad truth about your daughter is that she will never change as long as you are making it easy for her. Please order and read this book as many times as you can. It will save your daughter's life. "Tough Love" by Phyllis and David York and Ted Wacgtel. It is a small book, but you will understand your daughter's drug life so much clearer if you read it. I'll be praying for you and for her.

[DSLR]

Tired of living this way!

Hi buffy, thinking of you and your daughter, be strong and bless you all.

[Jolie]

Tired of living this way!

Buffy,

Just wanted to welcome you as well and let you know I'm sending up a prayer for you and your whole family.