So Far

[Tipplerette]

So Far

Keep it up. What's your secret weapon??? Sometimes it's just TIME eh?

[CakeQueen]

So Far

well I did it I dont know how I am doing it but I am. We went out at 7 I did have a small vodka whilst getting ready but that lasted almost an hour , we went to the first pub and I ordered tonic , the second pub we went to I had a cherry beer , which was really nice , then in the restaurant a glass of water and half of lager with lime I am home now sober and full and tired I am going to have a small vodka and go to bed

Alcohol nurse tomorrow, I am going to try aim for just two drinks tomorrow night then one on wednesday in my head Thursday will be my af day hopefully this will continue over the weekend too I am just keeping everything crossed at the moment and not setting too high goals

[Tipplerette]

So Far

What really stands out about you to me is your firm stance on your goal of cutting down leading to stopping altogether. You are not wishy washy. You have truly hit that wall and are 100% sure this is what you want. That seems to be the catalyst that is consistent in the successful ones answer to my question "What is it that made it work for you?". Seems that the 100% desire to quit is the be all and end all and after reading all your posts, you have it girl !! That's what is so amazing.

And that is why you will inevitably succeed long term.

You are truly amazing.

Tips

[nicelife]

So Far

Hello CakeQueen, I don't post that often but I just HAD to let you know you are absolutely my hero! I could never, ever contemplate cutting down and when I did stop drinking in 2004 I did it cold turkey. I know I don't have what it takes to cut back or moderate my drinking so I try to stay away from that first sip. You have courage, faith in yourself and from what I've seen you are realistic about what you are doing. And, you are more than one step further than when you saw your not so supportive GP. I admire you enormously! You reached out for help, get kicked in the guts and instead of just retreating or lying where you landed you got up, dusted yourself off and went about helping yourself. If that isn't admirable I don't know what is....sniffle, sniffle, sniffle. Gold stars to you!!!!!:goodjob:

[CakeQueen]

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Again everyone thank you so very much, this board is amazing. I know for a fact that its played a massive part in helping me get through the last 9 days. I didnt think I had it in me to cut back Nicelife, but as Tip said I think it was the time. I had been thinking seriously about it for a few weeks but kept putting it off because of the wd.

I was also sick of not getting things done and hiding vodka everywhere. I still dont know if I will make it but I am bloody trying. I have cried buckets reading some of the stories on this board you think you are the only one in the world going through this but I know thats not true. I have quite a stubbon personality and the one person other than the people on here who knows about my drinking is my sister years ago she said to me Tracy we are both the same and like to be in conrol , so why the swear are you letting booze control you

I am now trying hard not to let it , Alcohol nurse at 10am today so lets see what today brings

lots of heartfelt thanks to everyone that is keeping up and reading my I guess own drivel lol I does make it easier to release what you are feeling and to re read what a state I was in last week helps too

Tracy xxxxxxx

[madmans]

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You are doing great Tracy, i hope you feel better leaving the Alcohol nurse today than you did your leaving your GP .

[vintage girl]

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Ditto what madmans said, hope the nurse is supportive. :l

[spuddleduck]

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good luck with the nurse. pour you heart out and get the help you deserve

[CakeQueen]

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hello all , Well I went to my appointment and the lady Dee was really nice I was in there about 40 mins , I was much calmer and didnt get upset, I had to answer all sorts of questions which she scored and I came out at 20 which is apparently not an alcoholic !!!. I am drink dependent.

Had I scored 26 then I would have been an an alcoholic. We chatted about why I drank and the tolerence that I had built up to vodka, I explained that I can only drink 2 glasses of wine without feeling a litttle fuzzy. She agreed that the GP was right not to help me with my wd syptoms as that would have been a quick fix and they believe we neeed to make the decsion to stop on our own and work through the wd symtoms as this may inturn prevent any relapse.

I still bloody disagree , but i am over the worst of them. I held my hand out steady today for the first time in months without the aid of alcohol

I have a 4 week treatment plan which involves cutting down and finally achieving my goal of social drinking only , not drinking in the house and cutting out vodka totally I think If I cut out vodka I wont drink as much as I dont really like much else. she similarized (is that even a word) my drinking of vodka to people taking medicine , I drink vodka and can still function normally sort of !! yet we worked out that the units I am drinking were, I add WERE 28 units this is the equivilent to 3 botttles of wine per day ...

I would not wake up if I drank that lol ever ... but that is in effect what I was drinking that scared me to say the least.

I have to keep diarys and drinking charts and go back next Tuesday to see how I have got on , There was no form of medication offered at all, just the fact that this had to be done by me with the support of her and after 4 weeks i could join a group and have a key worker.

This I doubt would be for me but we will see at the end of the 4 weeks where I am at

So thats it for now folks thanks for checking in and up on me it really has made the world of difference todays goal is not to have a drink till 8pm again. I am going to the pub but thats becasue we play in the pool team so I shall have tonic and perhaps 1 lager or even try none we shall see how the evening pans out

love and hugs T xxxxxx

[madmans]

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take a look at this link https://www.mywayout.org/community/f4...ism-44263.html . i don't think it's just that black or white as to being drink dependent or an alcoholic and this post by Mario explained it better for me

[CakeQueen]

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Wow thanks Madmans I just read that and I would say I am at stage 2 with both feet in stage 3 ..lol fingers crossed thats going to change , My shakes have stopped thank satan and I dont bloody want them back

[leaveinsilence]

So Far

I'd never seen that link before, wow, actually it scared me to see how far to stage four I was heading even though I knew in my mind I was but always refused to believe it until last year. Little things in that stage four were already in my life, if it wasn't for me having the children I know I would have been far worse than I was.

Glad today went okayish and glad the shakes are subsiding, I hope seeing the nurse helped, I think I can see her reasoning about getting through the withdrawal and using it to help, not wanting to go through that all again is one of the things that makes me stop and think when I want to drink.... hard to see it though when you are experiencing withdrawal I know.

Hope you've managed todays goals I'm sure you have

xx

[CakeQueen]

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I didnt quite manage Tuesdays goals my aim was to have 2 drinks I had 3 , 2 very small vodkas and half a lager and lime this was inbetween 7pm and midnight when i went to bed. I am not dissapointed though prior to me starting to quit I would have drunk that in an hour. So today is day ten Wednesday I have quite a lot to do today work wise and and staying in this evening no pool games.

I slept really well last night and almost made 6hours thirty mins which for me is unheard of. I feel refreshed this morning I dont have a headache and I am not shaking at all WHOOOOOOOOOP

I have no plans to drink today and am going to have a really good go at an A|F day today if I do wicked if not its not the end of the world I am getting there slowly and achieving my goals

[Tipplerette]

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Another big WOW from me !! Do you realize how outstanding your willpower and committment is. We could ALL learn from you. Outstanding !!
Tips xox

[CakeQueen]

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Thanks Tipp xxx Its hard today, I really fancy a drink to be honest but I am going to sort the kids dinner out and then have a bath and a pamper night I think. I need to keep busy lol ... Today I made a three tier wedding cake cut my grass cleaned up did two lots of washing collected 15 year brat from school took her for new shoes and a top she must have ... and did a small supermarket shop I am knackered now lol