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    Setting a precedent

    :new: I don't drink everyday - but i binge drink. Going out for 1 or 2 can easily turn into way more. Recently i blacked out after a night out - something that has started happening more frequently in the past year and a half. My hangovers are bringing severe anxiety and sleeplessness with them. I then find out i did a number of different embarassing things while blacked out, (although thankfully i do somehow end up in my own bed) It's really difficult to explain to people that i think i have a problem. My friends downplay it - but because they have been my friends for years and i never suggested to them that i have a problem until now - the reason it is a problem now is that i can't take the anxiety that comes with a hangover - it has made me just want to quit. But staring at the rest of my life in my social circle where drinking is common place seems impossible. Has anyone else successfully breached the subject to friends and gained their support? Again, i don't keep alcohol in my apartment, and if i'm home alone i don't even think about drinking, but if i go out i end up getting trashed and hating the result. How do i tell the world i dont want to drink? I'm terribly afraid of being seen as a failure.

    #2
    Setting a precedent

    kidwunder;1112116 wrote: :new: I don't drink everyday - but i binge drink. Going out for 1 or 2 can easily turn into way more. Recently i blacked out after a night out - something that has started happening more frequently in the past year and a half. My hangovers are bringing severe anxiety and sleeplessness with them. I then find out i did a number of different embarassing things while blacked out, (although thankfully i do somehow end up in my own bed) It's really difficult to explain to people that i think i have a problem. My friends downplay it - but because they have been my friends for years and i never suggested to them that i have a problem until now - the reason it is a problem now is that i can't take the anxiety that comes with a hangover - it has made me just want to quit. But staring at the rest of my life in my social circle where drinking is common place seems impossible. Has anyone else successfully breached the subject to friends and gained their support? Again, i don't keep alcohol in my apartment, and if i'm home alone i don't even think about drinking, but if i go out i end up getting trashed and hating the result. How do i tell the world i dont want to drink? I'm terribly afraid of being seen as a failure.
    It's hard to say from the outside, not knowing the dynamics of your friendships etc. But what I would say is, if you are drinking with your friends to blackout stage, I don't think they'll be really surprised to find you have a problem.

    You have to put yourself first, no matter what your friends say is the best advice I can give you. If you feel you have a problem and they will be unsupportive are they really your friends? If they are then they will support you no matter what.

    Best of luck and welcome to MWO, please read and post here, you will be amazed at how much this site can help you.

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      #3
      Setting a precedent

      welcome kidwunder :welcome:. you have found a great site for support and advice.
      blackouts are awful, i have them most times i drink.. a sure sign that something has done be done about drinking.
      all of the friends i told have been hugely supportive, i dont think they liked seeing me in such a state. others i didnt tell i know would have brushed it off and told me to have another drink, i reckon these people also have a problem with drink and are not true friends.
      to many of us staring at a life without alcohol is scary which is why its good to take small steps... one day at a time. i have found i have to avoid certain places/people as it would be too easy to sink into the booze. i think you realize you have a problem and this is for you. you have to make yourself number 1 priority.
      whats worse, staring at a life without alcohol or staring at a life of the shame and embarresment caused by blackouts.
      i suggest reading loads on here and posting if you need help/advice. good luck
      Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
      Keep passing the open windows

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        #4
        Setting a precedent

        Hi kidwunder just like to say hello and welcome to mwo, lots of great support and advice here,give yourself a chance you are not alone.


        :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

        Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
        I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

        This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

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          #5
          Setting a precedent

          Thank-you folks, i appreciate the advice. I think my concern comes from realizing that, my social circle is surrounded by drinking - we go to bars, clubs, parties etc.. to show up and not drink is VERY tough... always having to tell people why you are not drinking... But moderation is not for me. The road to a blackout is paved with good intentions... One of the greatest gifts in the world to me is getting up (un-hungover) at 8am on a sunny saturday or sunday when no one is out yet and enjoying the day. I'm going to focus more on that and maybe convince others to join me. If they don't - it's their loss. Thank-you all.. I'm glad to be here!

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            #6
            Setting a precedent

            Hi kidwunder,

            Welcome to MWO, this is a good place!
            Good that you already know that moderation won't work for you - me either!
            Taking care of yourself might mean doing without friends who encourage you to drink, but that's OK. Like you said, they just may want to join you on your journey.

            My anxiety was crippling, quitting drinking helped tremendously. I am happy to be healthier & AF. I started by reading the MWO book, it has lots of good information. You can download it from the Health store right here on the site.

            Wishing you the best
            Lav
            AF since 03/26/09
            NF since 05/19/09
            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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