I need help and support

[drunkinslayer500]

I need help and support

Hello Scarlet...
I have looked through alot of the posts here to see that some are very worried about Christmas & new years.
Staying sober will be a challenge for most of us new members.
But what we must keep in mind is that staying clean and sober is a life long fight...
Yes i know it gets better with time but we must remember that these days coming up are no different than today or yesterday.
If you said no once then you can do it again.
Many of us will be around drinks because we will be at party's, family, friends...
But our minds have been made up to stay clean so whatever someone else does is there doing.
You and I can not fall for the trap...
We must look at alcohol as a loaded gun....
Don't play with it and it wont go off.
Drinking is not a joke for us because we know that we have a problem.
Cutting down or saying I will have just one is very dangerous....
We must remember that we are in a battle to stay clean.
Some days it will not be easy..
Some days it will be easy...
But everyday must have the same outcome...
The same ending....
Victory, Another day fresh without alcohol...
You will love yourself for it...
And others will too.
We are very special to someone and they want the best for us...
We want the best for ourselfs...
We can not afford to throw it all away for a drink.
We must stand our ground and do it.
For me I cant drink...
For me its not possible because if I drink on Christmas how the heck will I be able to stay clean on new years ? Or any other special day that the family gets together ?
I love Christmas but I'm not going to drink because its a holiday or because someone tells me to have a drink.
My battle is more important than that.....
Its more important than a holiday.
More important than a so called friend...
Its the most important thing in the world for me...
Is it the most important thing in the world for you ?
That is the question that you must ask yourself...
Whats REALLY important ?
What really matters ?
Who's life is this anyways ?
If I'm in control then why must i drink ?
And if I'm not in control, then i must get in control.
Just remember that we are solders at war...
Our battle is to be alcohol free...
And our weapon is our faith...
We must walk by faith and not by sight...
Christmas is a good thing....
Give yourself the best present ever...
Give yourself a clean fresh life....
And Have A Very Merry Christmas.

[Scarlet]

I need help and support

Hi drunkinslayer..... I agree with everything you've said. I did give a little advice on "my way" of coping with this time of year, but you are very correct - this is NOT a holiday battle. It's an everyday battle. I plan to treat it that way. I have just used "Christmas" as my excuse most every year to slide back into bad habits. But if I didn't have the holidays to blame it on.......we all know I have 100 other excuses up my sleeve. So, NO more excuses. Just affirmations. I will beat this.....one day at a time, every day for the rest of my life. Holidays or no.......

Thanks for your thoughts!! And good luck to all the newcomers!

Scarlet

[Olly]

I need help and support

Hey Scarlet, drunkinslayer and everyone,

I picked this time of year simply because I had a pretty big light bulb go off last week... "I have spent so much of my life drinking alcohol, of many times too much, that I'm done. I want life without alcohol"

When I am painfully honest with myself, I can go back "to the beginning" and start listing all the times, situations, holidays, occassions, etc., that I tainted and or flat out ruined because of alcohol. Not to mention the bigger issues... relationships, job performance, my spirit which I've severly bruised through time and my reputation. For these and a million other reasons, I really want to have some life experience without alcohol and it's torment.

How slippery is this though? I'm already hearing my little demon voice saying "Weellll... if I'm going to drink at Christmas dinner, then I'll REALLY keep it to just one glass and my committment will be to NOT GET DRUNK" (which, I can do...or have done... but it always leads me right back to wanting to stop all over again)

So, I'm getting ready for the battle. Got me a suit of "clear thinking armour" and my mental sledge hammer.

Olly

[Olly]

I need help and support

Hi Ilex!! :welcome:

Olly

[Owly]

I need help and support

Good luck with your battle plans guys

Christmas time is usually my driest because I don't get invited to any office parties or anything (being self-employed), I usually spend it on my own and all the shops and pubs are shut and those that are open are dead and all the reason to drink just gets sucked out of me. My family live in another country and my anxiety disorder keeps me from travel, I have to come up with new excuses every time though!

It sounds sad but I don't like these big occasions, and I have a very contrary nature so if everyone is going out and getting wasted it makes me want to stay in.

[drunkinslayer500]

I need help and support

Hello Again To Everyone Reading This....
I know and understand that this is not A funny situation but...
I must laugh at this whole thing..
We must understand what and where all of these fears and thoughts come from...
I believe that they come from us not believing in ourselves and thinking defeat...
But was must understand that everyday and everywhere, every situation is its own battle, its own drama.
If we can get hold of our thoughts, then we can control or destiny.
This is why its a must to stay alcohol free.
Alcohol clouds your judgment..
And I believe that it can take days before you start thinking clearly again.
Example I have not drank in 7 days BUT it was only 3 days ago that i started to really feel better.
Clear mind etc etc.
So we must understand that giving yourself time to get it right is VERY important on staying clean & sober.
How many times have you seen or heard your friends say that they have quit smoking ?
It takes time to get it right...
But you MUST be serious about this or it will not work...
Trust me when I say this...
If you really wanna see this battle won, Then it will be won.
My thoughts on how to stay clean is number1 keep god first in your life.
Who's the one who gives us the power to do the things we do ?
You or god ?
If its god then trust him...
If its you, then have confidence in yourself and do what you must do to stay clean.
Everyday somewhere And in someone there is a war....
A battle to accomplish something....
There are to many people in this world that have decided to be alcohol free...
If they can do it then so can we...
Life & death are in the power of the tongue, those who speak it will eat its fruit.
What this means is that if you say you cant, then you wont.
But if you say you can then you will.....
When you were a small child you tried to walk and run before you learned how...
This is the same thing that we are facing....
Don't look into the future of Christmas coming, but look at today.
It we do this then tomorrow will take care of itself.....
Be What You Are Meant To Be.....
Strong, Powerful, And A light To The World.
A joy to be around, And A friend of yourself....
Self destruction sucks....
BE WELL....

[drunkinslayer500]

I need help and support

Sorry That You Feel That Way.....
Everytime I Say Something I Hear It Too.
So If Nobody Else Hears Or Reads It...
Then I Can Have It There For Me...
I Need Hope Too

[drunkinslayer500]

I need help and support

Its Better To Rant And Get It Out...
Then Going Out And Get drunk...
I Came On Here To Get Help.
And If I Can Help Someone On My Way Up, Then I Will Take Them.
I'm Not Here For Secrets...
Drinking Kills Many People In Many Ways...
And When I Get Discouraged I Read My Messages As Well As Others...
It Keeps Me On Point.
I Hope That It Does The Same For You.
I Must Remember That Its My Recovery Thats Most Important.
And I Must Live Everyday Fighting This Battle As If It Were My Last Hope.
I Don't Mean To Rant But My Life Can Not Be In Danger Anymore Because Of My Reckless Living.
If Nothing Else These Words Are Words Of Hope For Me,
So I Can Make It Another Day Alcohol Free.

Peace And Blessings To All
Stay Clean

[Guest]

I need help and support

Thank you Slayer. Your words say it all. Peace to you friend.

[boycie]

I need help and support

Ditto because if just one of us can make it then it gives us all hope for a better tomorrow.

[Newstart]

I need help and support

Here Here!
Welcome one and all, and good luck to us all on our journey to AF land!
See you all here again soon
Newstart

[Popeye]

I need help and support

Hello All, and welcome to the newcomers.
Lots of great advice on this thread. I to am apprehensive about the Christmas holidays. I've got a few nights out and family 'dos' that I am expected to attend.
Owly said:
It sounds sad but I don't like these big occasions, and I have a very contrary nature so if everyone is going out and getting wasted it makes me want to stay in.
That sounds like me.
My problem is that I usually want to stay in on my own and get wasted.
Not this year. I haven't worked out my strategy completely, but I have the basis of a plan.
Hope you all get through it unscathed.
And Amelia...More sound advice . Thanks

[Alice]

I need help and support

Hello everyone

I've got butterflies writing this, don't quite know what I want to achieve, whether its to stop or cut back. But I want to feel like I am in control of my drinking, at the moment the wine has the upper hand. And I can't do this on my own. Its great to read all your messages, just knowing there are other people out there like me is a comfort. Wish me luck..............

[Scarlet]

I need help and support

Good Luck Alice

Hi Alice,

We are here for you! It's hard to cut back or abstain.......we ALL know that. I think it depends on how much you've been drinking as to what path you want to take.......moderation or abstinence. Maybe your body needs a break?? Then abstinence is the best bet.......but moderation might be more realistic at this time of year?? I am just 5 days sober myself (after many failed attempts) but already am feeling SO much better.....but the first 2 or 3 days are hard. Just know that we've all been where you are.....keep writing!