My abusive partner is (AL). This is how I am looking at my situation. I have been in this relationship on and of for the last 20 years. He has abused me physically, mentally, and spiritually. We have broken up countless times only to get back together and end up on the same destructive path. He has made me want to give up all my friends and become his only. He is so jealous and possessive.
If I spend a whole day with him he makes me feel guilty, ashamed, remorse, embarrassed,
sick, crazy in the head, panic attacks, useless he takes away everything that I thought I was. He even got me to believe that I could not go anywhere or do anything without him, go on a picnic, lunch, go out for dinner, have a friend over, go to a party, cooking in the kitchen, reading a book, gardening etc etc, the only place he could not control me was at work although he was still on my mind all day, thinking, should I see him when I come home, maybe just for a little while because I have felt so sick at work all day and he always makes me feel better.
So six days ago he nearly took the one thing that I love away from me, how dare he!!. So I have ended this abusive relationship for the last time.
I know deep down in my being that all I have to do is ring him and he will be back like that!!!! In a split of a second.
I love him. I love the feeling he gives to me when I think he is being nice to me. But I know if I call him again this will be the last time for me no more second chances for this relationship. He will take everything away from me, my home, my job, my three dogs, my sanity, my life. It would be a long slow heartbreaking and painful death. But I am fighting back with all my soul and I know this time around he is not coming back into my life ever ever again.
They say time is the healer and I know with each passing day it will be easier. Already into my 7th day without this relationship and I feel I am coming back into being me without him.
If I spend a whole day with him he makes me feel guilty, ashamed, remorse, embarrassed,
sick, crazy in the head, panic attacks, useless he takes away everything that I thought I was. He even got me to believe that I could not go anywhere or do anything without him, go on a picnic, lunch, go out for dinner, have a friend over, go to a party, cooking in the kitchen, reading a book, gardening etc etc, the only place he could not control me was at work although he was still on my mind all day, thinking, should I see him when I come home, maybe just for a little while because I have felt so sick at work all day and he always makes me feel better.
So six days ago he nearly took the one thing that I love away from me, how dare he!!. So I have ended this abusive relationship for the last time.
I know deep down in my being that all I have to do is ring him and he will be back like that!!!! In a split of a second.
I love him. I love the feeling he gives to me when I think he is being nice to me. But I know if I call him again this will be the last time for me no more second chances for this relationship. He will take everything away from me, my home, my job, my three dogs, my sanity, my life. It would be a long slow heartbreaking and painful death. But I am fighting back with all my soul and I know this time around he is not coming back into my life ever ever again.
They say time is the healer and I know with each passing day it will be easier. Already into my 7th day without this relationship and I feel I am coming back into being me without him.
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