All I Want Is 30 Days AF

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

FlyAway;1162308 wrote: Oh Juja, I'm so sorry. Just one more thing piled onto the already sky-high pile of stress in your life. Has he stopped drinking?

No, but he's moderating considerably. He and I were both on the antidepressant Lexapro, which fueled our drinking. He's on Wellbutrin now, and it has lessened his cravings tremendously. Maybe it's not all doom and gloom. I need to do some research. I'm still on Lexapro, but not drinking. It can be done.

Thanks for responding FA.:l

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

shueaddict;1162331 wrote: Oh Juja,

Big hug from me here ? Although it sounds horrific there is still a lot that he can do to prevent further development. Keep his spirits up (even if this means meds), worst thing is for him to give up on himself. And you must also look after yourself, it is a dreadful wake up call but be happy that you have already started your AF journey.

Sorry, not so good at the advice part but I am always optimistic and a firm believer that all things happen for a good reason.

I?ll pray for you and your brother and sending you positive vibes ?

Thank you, my friend.

[tonstantweader]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Juja,
I read this earlier but was unable to reply. You've been on my mind all afternoon. Even though I haven't been on here long, I feel a closeness to everyone here. I don't know much about cirrhosis of the liver, except that I have a sister who has it, and she has never drank at all. She actually has it because her eating habits are so awful and she consumes way too much fat. We are estranged, so I don't know how it is going. But my impression is that there are different stages? is your brother in an early stage?

My heart really goes out to you, though. It is obvious howmuch you care for your brother. Glad to hear you are doing ok with the Al. If this isn't a wakup call for quitting drinking, I dont' know what is. 48 is awfully young. give him a hug from all of us when you see him next.

[leaveinsilence]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

juja just to let you know thinking of you honey xx

[WineSucks]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good Evening Ladies....I feel bad for checking in so late the last couple of nights...it seems like I keep missing things and then I'm trying to catch up. I think I found a car and we are going back to the dealership tomorrow!

Juja - I am so sorry that you have to go through this difficult time. I know you said you didn't want to drink and I think you are doing amazing! I know you asked for words of wisdom and support. You have our full support and I am sending big hugs to you. As far as wisdom.....I've been through periods in my life when one thing after another piles on. It can be overwhelming. First, the only thing that got me through and provided any real comfort was prayer. Second, I learned to take care of myself during those times as well, which wasn't easy (My Mom passed away at 54 from lung cancer and I was her primary care-taker). I also learned to appreciate life more when things WEREN'T going on because I knew that things could change in a day and I could be dealing with things that I had no control over. So, my friend, I will pray that you have the grace and strength to get through this and I will pray for your family, as well.

To the rest of you wonderful ladies - You are all doing amazing. I hope you guys have a great night and a healthy and happy Saturday!

[Margaret345]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Have a good weekend everyone! You are doing amazing Juja. You have a ton on your plate. Hugs to you!!!

[Twinkle Girl]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Morning everyone,
Just a quickie while hubby in the shower. Hurrah! Made it through Fri night AF - sounds pathetic but a big achievement for me & it's the support I've found here that's giving me the determination and strength to make this happen. Fri night has always signified the beginning of a wine fuelled w/end. I think DH has finally realised I'm serious about this - he brought me a cup of tea last night and I smiled sweetly and thanked him throught gritted teeth!! I haven't had a hot drink after 5pm in a decade!! Anyway, off to the local balloon fiesta with a clear head - I think I could get used to this but thoughts about drinking/or not drinking are still taking up most of my day - will this improve?

Juja - thoughts and prayers going out to you - you sure have a lot on your plate right now. I hope your brother realises what a great inspirational and supportive person you are as much as we all do. Good luck with the research.

[shueaddict]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good morning peepes,

This morning is the first in a long time when I woke up feeeling like myself, upbeat, rested, bouncy and ready for the day. Even my trainer noticed my energy and said my skin looks better.

Twinckle, congrats ! First AF friday is a cornerstone. Since quitting drinking i have been on an emotional rollercoaster and in the first days AL was constantly on my mind. It passed, but not before experiencing anger, frustration, depression, lethargy and sometimes feeling like i am going pure bonkers. Hang in there, the end result is worth it.

Juja, have you found anything to give you hope in your research?

Fly , i appreciate you even more knowing you look after us under those massive headaches.

WS , dish on the car ....

Tons, you cracked me up on another thread, being literally a child at heart. So what is good on the Wii these days?

Happy weekend ladies, I am on the line if anyone's craving

[Queenbug]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Juja....big love and good vibes for you....still on Iphone...internet won't be on till Monday...just wanted to say I care xx

[WineSucks]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good Sober Saturday Ladies - I'm getting ready to go to the gym. No hanover here!

Twinkle - Congrats on making it through Friday night. That is a BIG deal. I think the cravings come and go. I can't remember what day I'm on but I know it's almost 30. Anyway, I've done great for the past couple of weeks and the last couple of days I've been having cravings and I've had to surf through them. L-Glut definately helped me. After many failed attempts and giving in to the cravings, I've come to accept that they will not just disappear and I need to work through them. I wanted a drink last night so bad it was ridiculous. I just wanted to relax with a glass of wine and I was really missing it. But, I knew how bad I would feel today so I pushed past it....easy no but rewarding yes. It's 7:40 a.m. and I'm getting ready to go to the gym. If I had drank last night, I would still be sleeping.

Have fun today and if a craving comes in, try to push it out of your head. Envision yourself on a surf board, riding a big wave.

I'll check back in later..............hopefully, I'll be reporting that I got a car!!!!

Oh, Shue, I just saw your message, we must have been typing at the same time. I'm looking at a 2012 Kia Optima. The thing is loaded....it has heated and cooled seats (I've never heard of that before but they work!), sunroof, Navigation System....I didn't expect to like it but test drove it yesterday, after some others and it handled amazing! The color is called "Spicy" Red!

It looks like Day 25 for me! (If anyone has counted different, please let me know)

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Morning, glories,

Thanks for all the good vibes and support re my brother. I haven't done any research on cirrhosis because I'm tired of thinking about Al all the time. Regardless of what I find out, my brother will do what he wants. Period. His wife's a nurse, her father's an alcoholic, so she knows the score. I am thinking about telling my brother I won't watch him die from end-stage cirrhosis, if that's where his drinking leads. I say that, yet I don't know that I could abandon him.

Twinkle--You didn't drink last night! You made it! Yahoo! Whew, one biggie down. Keep it up, please.

Shue, Margaret, LIS, and Tonst--Thank you for the support. As someone said on Underoos, it's of utmost important that our posts are read and responded to. You did that for me, and I don't feel so alone. I haven't told DH about my brother; I don't want to hear his comments, or see the "I told you so" look on his face. He's not real supportive. I don't think he understands the concept of deep love, or helping others, but that's a rant for another day.

Nice car, Shue! Vro-o-om!

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

:loveyou:

WineSucks;1162631 wrote: Good Evening Ladies....I feel bad for checking in so late the last couple of nights...it seems like I keep missing things and then I'm trying to catch up. I think I found a car and we are going back to the dealership tomorrow!

Juja - I am so sorry that you have to go through this difficult time. I know you said you didn't want to drink and I think you are doing amazing! I know you asked for words of wisdom and support. You have our full support and I am sending big hugs to you. As far as wisdom.....I've been through periods in my life when one thing after another piles on. It can be overwhelming. First, the only thing that got me through and provided any real comfort was prayer. Second, I learned to take care of myself during those times as well, which wasn't easy (My Mom passed away at 54 from lung cancer and I was her primary care-taker). I also learned to appreciate life more when things WEREN'T going on because I knew that things could change in a day and I could be dealing with things that I had no control over. So, my friend, I will pray that you have the grace and strength to get through this and I will pray for your family, as well.

To the rest of you wonderful ladies - You are all doing amazing. I hope you guys have a great night and a healthy and happy Saturday!

Thank you, Wine. I truly appreciate your prayers, and extended post.:h

You're right about things piling on. It seems that once I hit 50, life became a struggle rather than a joy. I understand, too, about appreciating the good days, but right now I'm stuck in the waiting-for-the-other-shoe-to-drop mode. On edge waiting for THE phone call, caretaking details always in the back of my mind, making lists of things to get, do, for Mom, etc. After awhile, I'll probably get to the ODAT with life, too, and be able to relax during the down times. I guess this is the new norm, and eventually I'll roll with it.

Mind if I jabber for awhile? My windows are filthy, the porches and deck need to be hosed down, closets need to be cleaned out, I have piles of accumlated things waiting to be taken to auction, my car is dirty, 5+ pairs of pants need to be hemmed. I can't get anything done but laundry and some cooking. I LIKE things finished, and I WANT my environment calm and orderly, maybe because my mind isn't. I feel overwhelmed. I know there's a lesson to be learned here, about letting go, but damn, it's hard. All of it makes me nuts, so I go to bed. I did clean a bit yesterday because I couldn't stand the cat hair anymore (we have two indoor cats). That made me feel better, even though it was a struggle to get through. Today, I'll do a little more--unless there's a phone call...

I know everyone's struggling with something; I'm not alone, but it's still maddening.

Thanks for listening. It helped.

I hope your head isn't pounding too badly today. Take it easy.

:loveyou:[

[Clover]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good Morning, Ladies!

Juja, I just read about your brother and I'm very sorry to hear about his illness. I have a brother who drinks quite a bit, too, but he doesn't actually seem alcholic to me. And my dad was most definitely an alcoholic; he died about 2 years ago. Lousy genetics, indeed! Have you read through the "Holistic Healing" section? There might be some info there about liver health. I think the liver is actually able to repair itself (within reason) and Milk Thistle and Dandelion are supposed to help. If your brother isn't ready to completely quit AL, maybe he could at least start eating a healthy diet and trying some supplements. I just wish life would ease up on you a bit; it is strange how things seem to pile up, when it rains, it pours, etc. As you know, I've had some stuff piling up, too, and it does make you wonder if you're being tested! Please keep us posted about your brother and everything else, too!

I went out last night and listened to some music with a good friend. I was nervous about doing this, but she and I really needed to chat and have a catch-up about our kids. I didn't stay long, only a little over an hour. She asked what I was going to drink and when I said probably just some seltzer, she said she was just going to have a coke. I saw lots of people I know (I NEVER go out anymore). But it was actually fun, in a very different way! How interesting to see other people getting buzzed and even sloshed while I was perfectly coherent and clear-headed for a change!

And what a pleasure, in spite of everything life throws at us, to wake up on a Saturday morning feeling good! I wish all of you a wonderful, sober Saturday!

[FlyAway]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Twinkle Girl;1162807 wrote: Morning everyone,
Just a quickie while hubby in the shower. Hurrah! Made it through Fri night AF - sounds pathetic but a big achievement for me & it's the support I've found here that's giving me the determination and strength to make this happen. Fri night has always signified the beginning of a wine fuelled w/end. I think DH has finally realised I'm serious about this - he brought me a cup of tea last night and I smiled sweetly and thanked him throught gritted teeth!! I haven't had a hot drink after 5pm in a decade!! Anyway, off to the local balloon fiesta with a clear head - I think I could get used to this but thoughts about drinking/or not drinking are still taking up most of my day - will this improve?
Look at you! Way to go! It absolutely does NOT sound pathetic! We've all been right where you're at. You get through one weekend or one event and you feel a little bit stronger. Then another and another and you build off of each event. You're doing great. And yes, the thoughts will improve, but it will take time. Alcohol has been a part of your life for a long time and it won't just leave in a week's time. I'm over a month out now and still think about it quite a bit. Not as bad as at first, but it's surprising how often you have to consciously decide what you're going to drink or not drink.

shueaddict;1162831 wrote:
This morning is the first in a long time when I woke up feeeling like myself, upbeat, rested, bouncy and ready for the day. Even my trainer noticed my energy and said my skin looks better.
Yeah Shue! Fabulous!
Queenbug;1162832 wrote: Juja....big love and good vibes for you....still on Iphone...internet won't be on till Monday...just wanted to say I care xx

Hi Queen! Can't wait until Monday to hear all about how you're doing.
WineSucks;1162833 wrote:
Twinkle - Congrats on making it through Friday night. That is a BIG deal. I think the cravings come and go. I can't remember what day I'm on but I know it's almost 30. Anyway, I've done great for the past couple of weeks and the last couple of days I've been having cravings and I've had to surf through them. L-Glut definately helped me. After many failed attempts and giving in to the cravings, I've come to accept that they will not just disappear and I need to work through them. I wanted a drink last night so bad it was ridiculous. I just wanted to relax with a glass of wine and I was really missing it. But, I knew how bad I would feel today so I pushed past it....easy no but rewarding yes. It's 7:40 a.m. and I'm getting ready to go to the gym. If I had drank last night, I would still be sleeping.

Have fun today and if a craving comes in, try to push it out of your head. Envision yourself on a surf board, riding a big wave.

Yep, I still get cravings too. But I know I can beat them. And I have heated seats in my car, but cooled seats sound flipping fabulous in this summer heat!
Juja;1162848 wrote:
Thanks for all the good vibes and support re my brother. I haven't done any research on cirrhosis because I'm tired of thinking about Al all the time. Regardless of what I find out, my brother will do what he wants. Period. His wife's a nurse, her father's an alcoholic, so she knows the score. I am thinking about telling my brother I won't watch him die from end-stage cirrhosis, if that's where his drinking leads. I say that, yet I don't know that I could abandon him.

Shue, Margaret, LIS, and Tonst--Thank you for the support. As someone said on Underoos, it's of utmost important that our posts are read and responded to. You did that for me, and I don't feel so alone. I haven't told DH about my brother; I don't want to hear his comments, or see the "I told you so" look on his face. He's not real supportive. I don't think he understands the concept of deep love, or helping others, but that's a rant for another day.
Juja you are right about your brother. He'll do what he wants. I started researching "early stage cirrhosis" and saw that if you stopped drinking completely it could be managed. But you can't force him. You said he's known about this for a while, so I'm sure he's aware. You have no control over this unfortunately. And I'm sorry that your husband isn't supportive. "I told you so" comments are the last thing you need right now. When my mom got sick in 2008, my life was a living hell for about 2 years. It's still hard now with her being in the home, but before that she was living with me and my sister, splitting time between our homes. She has dementia and would wander, and turn on the cooktop, and get up all through the night, and need help using the toilet, and need help getting dressed and bathing, etc. And I was working full time and doing everything else I'm doing now. I was ready to lose my mind, probably much like you feel now. For some reason at the times in my life where I feel the most out of control my husband has to do something really f*cking stupid to add even more turmoil to my life. I don't know if he was feeling like I wasn't paying enough attention to him or what, but I was barely getting 4 hours of sleep a night. And he certainly was doing as little as possible to help. So aggravating and it infuriates me to even think about it. You need support right now, not someone to sit and judge and point out mistakes. :l

[FlyAway]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Clover;1162867 wrote:
I went out last night and listened to some music with a good friend. I was nervous about doing this, but she and I really needed to chat and have a catch-up about our kids. I didn't stay long, only a little over an hour. She asked what I was going to drink and when I said probably just some seltzer, she said she was just going to have a coke. I saw lots of people I know (I NEVER go out anymore). But it was actually fun, in a very different way! How interesting to see other people getting buzzed and even sloshed while I was perfectly coherent and clear-headed for a change!

And what a pleasure, in spite of everything life throws at us, to wake up on a Saturday morning feeling good! I wish all of you a wonderful, sober Saturday!

Great job Clover!