All I Want Is 30 Days AF

[SarahJane]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

hi

I am having trouble posting today so will be quick, just wanted to check in.
Juju I am so sorry to hear about your brother being sick- I really hope this latest setback will shock him into stopping drinking, as that is the only way he will improve. He is so lucky to have a sister like you. :l
WS hope that car is perfect for you- what fun you will have driving to work by yourself!
Clover sounds like you had a lovely time out- there is a social life after AL!
Fly you have been through tough times, you are so supportive to everyone.

I was out last night for a family meal & was happy enough drinking water. We went there 2 years ago & I had lots of wine which affected me more than usual. I went to pay before we left, then decided to go to the toilet. The next day I couldn't remember if I paid or not. :upset:I had to ring them & ask, made some silly excuse for my bad memory. They said they would look into it & get back to me- they never did. So I still don't know! Had forgotten about it until we were there last night-made me grateful that I wasn't drinking anymore. I happily paid the bill & left a good tip. Much cheaper without wine. My husband didn't have any wine either- said he wouldn't bother & felt more like drinking water.
Now my neighbour has invited us to dinner tonight. They are big drinkers & have no idea that I am not drinking. I had my last drink in their house 3 weeks ago, they nearly crashed the car the next day. I might use my marathon training as an excuse as I am feeling a bit flat today & not in the mood for questions. There are lots of people who I have no problem telling that I don't drink anymore- but there are some people that could unhinge me a bit.
So much for a quick post!
I haven't accepted yet so may not even go-will see how I feel later.

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

FlyAway;1162871 wrote:

I was ready to lose my mind, probably much like you feel now. For some reason at the times in my life where I feel the most out of control my husband has to do something really f*cking stupid to add even more turmoil to my life. I don't know if he was feeling like I wasn't paying enough attention to him or what, but I was barely getting 4 hours of sleep a night. And he certainly was doing as little as possible to help. So aggravating and it infuriates me to even think about it. You need support right now, not someone to sit and judge and point out mistakes. :l

Fly--Bingo!!! No "Can I hold you?, Can I do something to ease your burden?, Do you want me to vacuum, wash your car, etc." Why are they so damn needy and selfish when we need them so desperately? It boggles my mind because if he were in my shoes, I'd do everything possible to make his life easier.

Also, you're a better woman than me. I couldn't do what you did for your mother. I would lose it for sure. Kudos, lovely, kind-hearted, daughter.

:l

[tonstantweader]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hi everyone, I've had a good day today. A few cravings, but my L-glut arrived and that does seem to help. Twinkle - I've wondered, too, if the constant thinking about alcohol will end some day. I try to banish them by concentrating an how great it is to be sober.
I wish I could remember what everyone has said, and who said it, by the time I finish catching up with these posts, but I never do and when I try to comment on everyone's posts I inevitably leave someone out and then I feel guilty.

so, a shout out to all of you. Let's get through Saturday together. This will be my second sober weekend in a row!

[WineSucks]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Happy Sunday everyone.........I finally got a car but not the one I was talking about yesterday. They were jerking us around on the financing so I ended up with a Toyota Camry...no cooling seats but it has everything else, plus 0% financing and 2 years of free maintenance. I'm so excited!

You guys are doing amazing. Clover and SJ....good going being able to go out and socialize without drinking. SJ.....I like the idea of using the marathon, plus it's true. If you drink, it will ruin your training.

Juja - You are welcome. I also understand about not being able to get anything done. I think part of it is everything going on with your family and the other part is not drinking. You are going through major life changes right now, both good and bad that can be overwhelming. I've found it helpful to pick one thing and just focus on it. It takes your mind off of everything else. I actually started doing yoga for this reason. You have to focus on your position and if your mind wanders, you fall out of your pose.

TN - I know what you mean about remembering what everyone posted....I'm terrible at it and I always feel like I leave someone out and I don't mean to. The friendships that we have developed on this site are wonderful and I value every single person who posts.

Well, off to clean the house and get ready for the week ahead (it's going to be a rough one).

Have a great day!

[Clover]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hello, Everyone! I wanted to check in on this very HOT Sunday. I've been visiting and reading but not posting much. I've stayed really busy socializing this weekend, which is a good thing. But now I need to buckle down and clean my hell hole of a house. But first, out to lunch with my daughter!

I'll probably drop in later just to check in. I would like to be more supportive, ladies, and give a personal shout-out to everyone. But the truth is, it's been a helluva week and I just don't have a lot in me right now. I haven't especially wanted to drink - I can't even think of just having a glass of vino, that doesn't even appeal to me. Earlier this week on my son's birthday, I briefly thought about getting downright shit-faced wasted, but thank God I did not.

I hope you all have a lovely, sober Sunday!

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hi, all,

Just want to say hello on a rainy (thank heavens!), Sunday evening. We've had two inches in two days, I am so very grateful, regardless of how fast and hard it's come down.

I really wanted to buy a bottle of cold chardonnary today, and get crazy drunk, but I didn't. It wasn't a craving, just a WTF, everthing else is crap, so what difference does would it make. I realized getting blasted would make a big difference--blow my 30 days AF (tomorrow), my problems would still be here, and I would be even more depressed than I am now. So, I came home and rested. Surprisingly, DH came in the bedroom, lay beside me, and put his arm around me to comfort me. I have forgotten how much comfort physical contact provides. I actually had a peaceful nap.

I'm giving myself the rest of the evening off. I've cleaned, done laundry, sorted closets and drawers, and done mending, so enough's enough. I bought a detective novel at a flea market today, and will escape to bed with that shortly. Ah-h-h-h, nothing like a book to take us miles away.

Everyone have a great Monday!:l

[WineSucks]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Juja - I just noticed you are in Virginia....I'm in Maryland so we are close! It's been raining on and off here today. I cleaned the house and relaxed. 30 Days tomorrow is Awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mine will be Thursday. What are your plans regarding drinking after 30 days?

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Wine--You're in MD? I had no idea! I don't know why that makes me happy, but it does. I think I connected with you immediately because of similar problems with wine, and have ridden on your coattails every since. Yours may have been the first thread I posted on--not sure.

My plans are to remain AF. There's no moderating for me, and I know it. I'm sad because I'd like to drink like a normal person, but know I can't. In 3 weeks, if all goes well (fingers-crossed), we'll be in New England for a much needed vacation. Lobster, crab, etc., and no white vino? Nope, and I guess that's the way it has to be. If I can ever get off Lexapro (antidepressant), maybe I can drink normally again, but staying on my meds is more important that AL. Abstinence it is, then.

Something else: I can't, for the life of me, figure out why I'm not losing weight. No bottle of wine a night, no junk food, pasta or massive amounts of food, and still stuck at the same weight. Any ideas? Maybe if I had the time and resolve to exercise, I would get a kick-start on the weight loss, but I'm so tired of working on every damn thing.... Understand?

[tonstantweader]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Juja and Winesucks,
I am close by, too, in Maryland!
I'm glad you didn't give in Juja. I keep telling myself that if Juja can handle all she is handling and not give in, I can get through my relatively stress-free life without a bottle of wine. And I gravitated to your thread, Winesucks, because I have the same problem. I can leave hard liquor completely alone, but wine calls my name every day.
We are about to have a strong thunderstorm here. Luckily this summer has not been the usual drought by July and August. Things are actually still green.
Looking forward to an AF week!

[Clover]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good Evening, Ladies! Juja, I know just what you mean about getting crazy drunk when you're feeling like f**k it all, might as well tie one on. I don't exactly have cravings so much but when I'm feeling really low and hopeless, getting really loaded does cross my mind. And I know damned well it would not be a matter of a nice glass of wine or two; I would get absolutely blotto! I'm just so very glad you decided not to do that!

WS, I should have cleaned my pit of a house, too, but instead I went out Friday night AND tonight to listen to music and was a lazy bum on Saturday. I was a real social butterfly this weekend and neglected all of my chores. Oh, what the hell, it was needed after this last piece of s**t week! The good news is that I feel much better this evening and am looking forward to waking up tomorrow and going to work without a pounding head and sick stomach. How is your tummy doing, any better?

I hope everyone has a nice, relaxing sober Sunday night!

[Juja]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Tonstant-- Another Marylander, how about that? Maybe you, Winesucks and I can get together sometime down the road. Who knows? We seem to have other things in common besides wine. Oh, and the bottle wasn't calling me, it was anger and frustration. Being in the car with my husband for any length of time makes me extremely frustrated, too. I was ready to kill, skin and tan his hide by the time we got home. Also, my stress load doesn't compare to what some others here are experiencing, but it's real, and it's mine, nonetheless.

Clover--Funny, isn't it, how when you're pissed at the world, you feel like tying one on? It seemed like the perfectly plausible option for a stressed-out, angry, frustrated retiree (me) to do on a Sunday summer night--- if she only did it once or twice a year, that is. Sort of like driving a car 100 mph on a straight stretch of road just for the hell of it. Sometimes we need to blow off steam. Too bad we can't. I crave a bit of living on the edge now and then.

Ah, well. Back to the safe and wholesome life. (sigh)

Time to go to sleep. I turn out the light, drift off, and shortly thereafter come awake with start. Consequently, I'm up and down.

[Twinkle Girl]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Morning Ladies and what a great morning it is! First AF weekend behind me and experiencing a mixture of emotions, mainly disbelief!! Took family to balloon fiesta yesterday to break routine of Sunday lunchtime wine binge - only problem was there were beer/wine tents everywhere and everyone seemed to be wandering around with AL drinks as if trying to tease me. The temptation to have a cold pint of cider (that's my sunny day 2nd choice drink) was unbearable but I think my DH could read my mind so he kept us moving!!

Anyway, week 2 here we come, going to take the kids to the beach today. I'm so chuffed with myself and in a really positive frame of mind. I'd normally be sleeping off the w/end now, what a waste!!

Juja - Congrats on 30 days, that is soooo awesome with all you're dealing with. You are such an inspiration. Try to grab some time for yourself and enjoy your book.

WS - You're not far behind, keep surfing those waves, I'm on my board right behind you!

Rollerblader & SJ - How did you get on at the weekend with your social dates? I've deliberately not put myself in a social position yet but it's only a matter of time!!

Love to everyone else - keep up the good work and have a fab week x

[Rollerblader]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hey ladies,

sorry for lack of contact over the weekend - I have been cheating by working a double night shift so there is no temptation to drink. So although it's my first AF weekend, it really isn't as I didn't do any usual weekend stuff and didn't have to be particularly strong - if I wasn't in work I was in bed.

Juja - can I add to all the others on here in saying I am so sorry to hear of your brother, and I think it's amazing that you're managing to stay off the sauce with so much stress.

Twinkle - I managed Friday night by inviting my friends over here for a DVD night instead of our usual pub crawl. My friends were drinking wine but I wasn't didn't even feel like I wanted any, and got my friend to take what was left in the bottle home with him. I thought "This is easy!"

Today is different tho, as usually after a run of nights I would reward myself with a morning sleep and an afternoon bottle of wine drunk snuggled on my sofa with my dog and a good book. It was a real treat I looked forward to and even though I keep reminding myself I don't drink anymore because it's poison I still feel that my first day off has been somewhat anticlimactic.

Has anybody else dealt with this sort of feeling and do you have any tips? I really don't want to drink again - I am only on AF Day 5 and it already feels like I've run a marathon, don't want to go back but it seems a bit bleak at the moment. Think I'll take my dog for a walk and check in with you all later.

Thanks for all the support xxx

[beautifullife]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

WineSucks- Congratulations to your 30 days on this Thursday!!! I am back to start this over again. I have not been on since June, which I remained AF for a week... then I lost my way fighting on again and off again since. I have come back here because it is the only thing that keeps my mind set on being AF. I have you in my buddy list and want to get back on the thread with you. Like Juja said, I immediately connected with you (when I started back in June) because of similar problems with wine. I am excited to hear that you are almost 30 days into it -- AF! I am starting my day 1, again, today and WILL NOT be leaving this thread again. You give me hope!

[shueaddict]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

One more AF weekend for me ( but not without hurdles) ? thoughts of having a drink ( just one, just one gulp) plagued me so I kept busy as much as possible. Still, here I am, halfway through the month, sober.

WS , Clover, Juja and Fly ? my sage friends, I have a lot to learn from you . It is somehow comforting knowing that you too still get the urge to drink every now and again but shake it off. Maybe this is something we will just have to live with and keep fighting. I am becoming more and more accepting of that particular thought.

Twinkle - Happy 1st AF weekend. I know it is hard and you did it. Hooray !!! I am only a month ahead of you for quitting drinking and the memory of being severely distraught on my first AF weekend is still raw. I know just how easy it is to say ? the hell with it, one gulp won?t matter? ? but you found the strength.

Juja ? I hope I am not jumping the gun by wishing you happy 30 AF days !!! I am younger than you ( 35) and still not losing weight either. My doctor told me that I need to readjust my diet and teach my body how to live without the AL sugars first - then I can start dieting or stronger training. This was my first weekend without depression, energy lows or lethargy so I?ll take that as a good sign.

WS ? you?ve got your wheels, baby !!! Enjoy the return of car independence.

Tons ? I am a wine head too (could turn down whiskey or cocktails, no probs) ? I went cold turkey over a month ago and I can say that wine does not tempt me anymore, other alcohol does though. It?s like I programmed myself to fear wine so now my AL monster is trying to get it from gin or other.