All I Want Is 30 Days AF

[WineSucks]

Hello Everyone -

I've been doing a lot of reading in MWO and decided it's time to get serious, so I'm posting. In a nutshell, I'm 45, have a great family, a great career, and I'm stuck on stupid. I don't think I've gone 30 days in the past 8 years at least. Went through a nasty divorce, new marriage, trouble teenagers and any other excuse to put down a bottle (sometimes a little more) of wine most nights. I've noticed that my thoughts and attitude about drinking are changing and I feel like I'm ready to turn a corner.

I am very empathetic to everyone that struggles with this awful addiction; however, I am truly empathetic to the good old girls, like me, who just struggle with that darn wine addiction. It's not enough to send us running to rehab but it's just enough to make us miserable. It's just enough to make us feel hungover and depressed...full of self-loathing and cloudy the next day. It's just enough to add that extra 10,20 or 30 extra pounds that we are carrying around when we would otherwise be in good physical shape...and it's just enough to make us feel too crappy to exercise the next day.

Lately, I don't like my body and I've noticed that most days after drinking the night before, my blood pressure is high and I feel terrible. I just want to stay focused on going 30 straight days AF and I know that it's only by the the grace of God and the support from other's on this website that I'll make it.

I'm going to try to post everyday on this thread because I feel like it's one of the things that will help me stay focused. Like so many of you, my kids have grown, I don't have any real hobbies and I think I often drink out of boredom and because there isn't anything better to do. I'm even hiding my drinking from my husband so I'm afraid if I don't get this in check it will get out of control.

I noticed there are alot of you that have been posting that are in the same boat.....does anyone care to joing me? We can do this together.....all we have to do is stay focused on making it for 30 days.

[Lavande]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

What a perfect name WineSucks :H:H

Couldn't have said it better myself!
Welcome to MWO, this is a good place. I quit my similar wine habit & you can too

I started by downloading & reading the MWO book. It has lots of great information. Next you need to make yourself a good plan. Look in the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html for lots of ideas. You need to fill in your drinking time with healthier activities, hobbies, etc. It's never too late to start a new hobby - do something you've always wanted to do but never got around to trying.

Wishing you the very best, please let us know how you are doing.

Lav

[Clover]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

What a great idea! I'm definitely on board for going 30 days AF .... and hopefully a lot more than 30 days after that! I've made a few feeble attempts on my own, but it never lasts long. I drink out of boredom, loneliness, anxiety, depression ... you name it! I went through a divorce about 6 years ago and was okay until I got laid off from a job about 3 years ago. I'm working again, but it's a lousy job, my kids are teenagers and off on their own a lot with their friends. I dated quite a bit right after my divorce, but have completely lost interest in that for at least the last year or so. I just sit at home, alone usually, and drink wine. I have a few close friends in town and need to reach out and quit being by myself so much. I'm VERY glad to have found MWO and I will visit every night after work. I'm feeling very hopeful and optimistic today!

[keepwalking]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hello girls, gosh you sound just like us lot on the thread in focus on fitness 30 days, no junk and lots of exercise, go and have a read and feel free to join us, we are all similar age and looking to drop those extra pounds, feel fit and fab and get rid of the nasty habit of opening wine every night coz it sucks! x

[Queenbug]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

So glad I.ve popped back to MWO...am still struggling...can sometimes manage a day or two...but mostly drink a bottle an evening, sometimes more if I'm home alone! WineSucks...that goddamm wine addiction...I hear you! I really want to loose weight, liven up, feel better and enjoy my kids and friends with a clear head...I'm with you...30 days here we come...hobbling at the moment, but I'm hoping that there will be a bit of (sober) dancing and laughing on the way. It's 9.20 pm 18 June here...my eyes are towards 18 July! x

[imabiggirlnow]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

HELLO DEAR MIRRORS OF MY ME!

Winesucks, and others,

iIt's as if you just wrote my story! sans the husband...I used his abusiveness as one of the excuses for my drinking. But of course when we divorced (almost 20 yrs ago!), I didn't stop, only used being alone and a single parent for the "excuse de jour." So, loneliness usually wins the daily title, but do I do anything to get out and be with people? Hell no! I continually create the world of victimhood and have finally reached the point of no return. I am so completely bored with myself!! And my higher self yawns and snorts and laughs at me when I open that wine bottle at night. My desire to quit has finally outweighed my need to drink.

I discovered the book only about 5 days ago, inhaled it, then found the site and truly believe that I have found the support that will get me over me! I thank you all for your authenticity. One thing I do know is that no matter what stories we tell ourselves, we're all in it together. I tried doing it alone for so long and it has done nothing other than distance me from those who love and care about me. I have stalked my children since "they're my best friends," but in reality, I haven't really let them go. When my daughter was 8 yrs old, she said, "Mom! You gotta get a life!" I didn't listen. I am listening now and willing to here good advice from others, like Lav (thank you thank you!).

Keep up the good work and I look forward to staying connected!

(don't like "imabiggirlnow"...does anyone know how I can change my username?)

[keepwalking]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Queenbug;1133541 wrote: So glad I.ve popped back to MWO...am still struggling...can sometimes manage a day or two...but mostly drink a bottle an evening, sometimes more if I'm home alone! WineSucks...that goddamm wine addiction...I hear you! I really want to loose weight, liven up, feel better and enjoy my kids and friends with a clear head...I'm with you...30 days here we come...hobbling at the moment, but I'm hoping that there will be a bit of (sober) dancing and laughing on the way. It's 9.20 pm 18 June here...my eyes are towards 18 July! x

There you are Hi Queenbug, great to see you still here, I am rooting for you, 18th july will arrive but just do tomorrow for starters and then click back here, you can do it and dont forget to check back in on our other thread, we missed you! xx:l

[keepwalking]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

imabiggirlnow;1133549 wrote: Winesucks, and others,

iIt's as if you just wrote my story! sans the husband...I used his abusiveness as one of the excuses for my drinking. But of course when we divorced (almost 20 yrs ago!), I didn't stop, only used being alone and a single parent for the "excuse de jour." So, loneliness usually wins the daily title, but do I do anything to get out and be with people? Hell no! I continually create the world of victimhood and have finally reached the point of no return. I am so completely bored with myself!! And my higher self yawns and snorts and laughs at me when I open that wine bottle at night. My desire to quit has finally outweighed my need to drink.

I discovered the book only about 5 days ago, inhaled it, then found the site and truly believe that I have found the support that will get me over me! I thank you all for your authenticity. One thing I do know is that no matter what stories we tell ourselves, we're all in it together. I tried doing it alone for so long and it has done nothing other than distance me from those who love and care about me. I have stalked my children since "they're my best friends," but in reality, I haven't really let them go. When my daughter was 8 yrs old, she said, "Mom! You gotta get a life!" I didn't listen. I am listening now and willing to here good advice from others, like Lav (thank you thank you!).

Keep up the good work and I look forward to staying connected!

(don't like "imabiggirlnow"...does anyone know how I can change my username?)

WOW! well done you, thats what i call progress!!!!! No idea how to change username but i guess you go into profile and edit settings just like you can edit picture?? Good luck, you sound so focussed, JUST DO IT!!! xx

[Queenbug]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

hya KW...thanks for remembering me! Just posted on your thread again. I was touched that you sent me a few shouts when I disappeared...thankyou.

See you on your thread and very well done..I'm really impressed xx

[keepwalking]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Queenbug;1133566 wrote: hya KW...thanks for remembering me! Just posted on your thread again. I was touched that you sent me a few shouts when I disappeared...thankyou.

See you on your thread and very well done..I'm really impressed xx

:thanks::h:l Keep posting queen B, so good to have you back xx

[dancingon]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hi ladies
This does seem to be a common time of life to slip under the influence. My story is very similar, except no new marriage for me and not likely to be. I need to get myself sorted for sure before I'd ever go there again.

A habit might start through the stress of a bad relationship, but once it becomes a habit it's not just that easy to stop. I separated 18 months ago, and my ex has been in a different town for 6 months which has been bliss, as I haven't had to cope with the abuse face to face. However, although I've achieved more success in the last 6 months than ever before, I'm not competely free yet. Once it is a habit you don't even need a reason to drink. You may even have some strong reasons to not drink that day and still drink. It's a crazy old world and we need to stop the craziness.

[WineSucks]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Thanks everyone for the encouragement.....it's seems like we are ready for 30 days. I'm excited to have people joining me in this adventure. KeepWalking.......I did check out the fitness thread and can relate so I'm on-board with that. I'm going for a bike ride tonight and going to the gym tomorrow. Imabigirlnow and Clover......I can so relate to shutting myself away or the feeling sorry for myself. It makes me sick to think of it. Also, I think I'm going to try to take the focus off myself and try to do one nice thing for someone else for the next 30 days. Even if it's just as simple as paying a sincere compliment. I feel so optimistic and encouraged today, I hope I can keep up the momentum....I'm so glad that if we have to be in this place in our lives we are all here together! WE CAN DO THIS!!!!!

[Queenbug]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

We can x

[keepwalking]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Queenbug;1133615 wrote: We can x

You most certainly can!! Love the idea of considering others, we can be guilty of self indulgence so I too will do at least one really nice thing for someone else tomorrow, xxx pay it forward as they say! Onwards and upwards fiesty ladies xx:goodjob:

[Clover]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

I'm actually feeling quite upbeat tonight, too! And that rarely happens to me on a Sunday night. I normally would have spent the entire afternoon drinking in order to be done early enough to make it into work on Monday. WineSucks, I might attempt a bike ride, too. And, hopefully, gym early tomorrow morning before work. It was just a few years ago that I went to the gym EVERY single day! Now, I'm lucky if I go twice a week because I'm either hung over or have NO energy or motivation. I feel very, very hopeful for all of us! I can't check the website from work, but I certainly will be here at night. Maybe we can help each other through the low points and cravings. My lovely daughter and I are going to make a nice dinner now. She still loves her Mom and hasn't given up on me. Funny, if there was ever a Sunday when I would desperately want to drink, this one is probably it. Father's Day is tough for me; my dad was an alcoholic and died about 2 years ago, much earlier than he should have. I'm very grateful to have these boards to hang out at!