All I Want Is 30 Days AF

[allybee]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

No time to post today, but it's day 8! The weekend was rough in places, but I made it! Thank you for all the replies to my pathetic weekend posts

I'm sorry not to address anyone individually tonight, but you're all in my thoughts.

[shueaddict]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

WineSucks, here are my 2 cents:

I have always found that my resolve goes to mush on holiday. So many times I said – this holiday I’ll run each morning / swim each afternoon / I’ll only eat salads for dinner / I’ll get lots of sleep / I’ll get a tennis lesson each day / I’ll get 3 yoga classes / massage every other day etc. By day 2 or 3 I’d find myself mellowed out and my brain unable to summon much beyond “which restaurant are we going to dinner to tonight?”.

Next week I also go on a beach holiday to the same hotel we go each year (yes, watching the sunset over beautiful Greek isles, drink in hand being my fave moment too) . I am going to try my best to stay AF. Exactly 1 year ago we went there and I told myself that I would use this holiday to drink moderately ( 2 drinks a day) - by day 3 I was pretending to go get us tea from the bar, order a quick drink and down it before the tea was ready. I insisted on putting the bill on my credit card so hubby would not check the extras list. I swear the minibar had a voice and was calling me while hubby was in the shower. Out of 7 nights I only managed 2 moderate ones, all the rest I was on the usual bottle a day.

It is true I did not have a moderation strategy in place but even if I plan to moderate on this holiday, even after so many days AF I just know I will surely reach the moment “Oh ... sod it, let’s get a bottle of wine, we’re on holiday !!!”. Holidays have simply not been the best of times for me to test my will power. My brain always screams at me " give me a break, lady, you've been working me like a sclave all year long"

Here’s this for “pull me off the ledge line” ( some other wise person used it before in this thread):

“You can choose to have the first drink but you cannot choose whether you get addicted or not”

[beautifullife]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good morning Ladies,

Just checking in as I start my official full day 2 of AF. I had an amazing day, yesterday, and it feels really good to FINALLY be here! I REMEMBER my kid's telling me how much they love me last night, and I REMEMBER my little girl asking to "snuggle in Mom and Dad's room, and watch The Upside Down Show (one of her favs.)," last night before I put them to bed. And I REMEMBER reading books with both my son and daughter before REMEMBERING falling asleep with both of them in my son's room! When I woke up clear headed in the middle of the night, I didn't look around wondering where I was or how I got there... I KNEW ALREADY, and quietly walked, not staggered, back to bed with my husband!!! IT FELT SOOOOO GLORIOUS!! I have a clear head today and have started putting my plans into action. I thank EVERY SINGLE ONE of you wonderful women here!! I would NEVER have gotten to this point without you and your support and help!!! I have to run and hope you all have a beautiful day!

Wine- I you are in my thoughts. I will be back soon for some more encouragement. How do you feel now? I hope amazing and remember that it is because you do not have that demon inside of your body! xoxo... I will be back soon

Caili- I am thinking of you also, and hope your day is going well. I will check in with you soon, too, as soon as I am done with my appt. this morning! Love to you!

xoxo
Beautifullife

Beautifullife

[shueaddict]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Ally ? you are not pathetic!!! You are fighting addiction or at the very least you are trying to change old habits .. not an easy thing to do.

Caili, how are you today?

Beautiful ? so happy you?re so full of beans, feels nice, doesn?t it, remembering it all.

Zimmer ? If people just assumed I was pregnant and tactfully left it there (after all I have gained weight around the middle and stopped drinking) I would be SOOO happy . But no, some have to nitpick and probe and drag out the truth from you . The truth is that I have a problem and I am not willing to openly admit to just anyone.

[Enough!]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Beautiful... Congratulations. Your post made me smile. It made me "remember" my first few days sober last month ( which seems a lifetime ago ). Just that feeling of wow... welcome back to your life

The good... The bad... The ugly... The fun... and the boring. It's MY life and I want to be part of it all!

Have a happy day all!
Enough!

[cailinog74]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

DAY 6 : here's to day 7

Evening to all my Brave Postees !

Well here I am on DAY 6. Had an early start bringing my Mother to airport and at this stage, if it wasn't for you all, I would be unwinding with wine and getting ready to settle on the couch for the night. Not today Girlies, went for a walk with my kids when we came back from airport and cooked dinner. It is 5.45 pm here and am looking forward to an AF evening (fingers crossed).

Thanks to all of you wonderful, honest and decent people for keeping me on the straight and narrow. Guys, do you know something, I have just discovered how much shopping you can actually buy if there is no AL in the trolley. Best wishes and love to you all for an AF day.

Love,

Cailinog74

[allybee]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Beautiful, your post made me smile, too. I'm so happy for you!

[beautifullife]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good evening Ladies, just a quick check in before bed!!

It has been another truly memorable and glorious day as this Day 2 comes to a close! Thank you Enough and ally for your kind comments. You guys all make me smile, and I cannot thank you enough for your help and support.

Caili- your comment about how much shopping you can actually buy if there is no AL in the trolley is SO darned correct! It has been a WOW moment for me as well.

Wine- I hope you are well with sweet thoughts in your mind. Your posts have helped me from the start... Stay strong!

I read a quote that I thought was nice, so:
Ideas appear and disappear. To encourage proper ideas to develop one must undertake practice.

Good night to you all!!

xo
Beautifullife

[Twinkle Girl]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Morning ladies, just a fleeting visit to wish you all a very happy Wednesday. My folks are having the kids for the day and I'm going to indulge in a spot of retail therepy - blow the dosh I would have otherwise squandered on wine!!

Caili - I'm programming myself to do a sharp U turn when I reach the wine section in the super market - 'keep walking' I tell myself, you don't need this S**T! You're right, I'm getting to the checkout and wondering why my trolley's half empty! More money to blow on shoes!!

Shue - The 'not to drink on hols' is a right bitch when folks like us are programmed to 'dive in' the moment off the plane - (or in my case, the moment on the plane!!) - Hurrah, schools out, kick back, crack open the vino, hol begins here! is how it's always gone with me which is why I had to get my hol out the way before I attempted to quit. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this tricky time but the greek islands hold many happy memories - you'll have a fab time, how many Jimmy Choos will you be packing!!

Beaut L, Ally, Caili - you're all doing so well and the positive vibes we're hearing are amazing. Each AF day that passes will make you appreciate the little things around you that might have previously been lost in the haze. A few weeks ago I wouldn't have been functioning properly at this time of the morning (8.55am) in fact, I'd probably still be in my pit feeling lousy and wondering how I was going to struggle through the day. Stay strong ladies and keep you eyes firming on the prize of AL freedom. Have a lush day. xx

[SarahJane]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Twinkle you said it-' keep your eyes firmly on the prize of AL freedom.' I am just beginning to see that now. It really is like winning a prize or getting a gift. I am not saying that it is all easy but it is a huge relief not to have to live the AL soaked life anymore.
I am not sure how I will manage when I go on holiday. I don't have anything planned at the moment but I will have to do it over the next few months. I know as soon as I give myself permission to have a drink then I don't stop. Last time we went away we were flying on a Thursday. I was trying to be off wine before the holiday but knew I would drink when away, so then I started 2 days before. So I had a hangover going away!
When I think about AL & holidays I think it has made & ruined holidays equally. It is lovely to sit & drink wine for the night- maybe 3/4 of a bottle /night. But I always felt sluggish everyday & would be thinking about drinking again that night.
Now that I am happy with my AF life I don't think I would want to go back to Day 1 again because of a holiday. I have had lots of social occasions when I have had a great time AF- I would try to look at a holiday the same way & enjoy the benefits that not drinking that poison every day brings.

Must get to the gym- have a great day everyone.

[shueaddict]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Good morning lovely ladies, one more glorious morning of waking up rested and clear headed. Lots to do in work before going away.

I am also getting myself mentally ready for my first AF holiday. I may be kidding myself but I think it will be easier for me to plan for no AL rather than juggle complicated thought processes and bargaining with myself trying to stop at just 2. I cannot ignore the fact that my liver could use the extended break.

I am thinking already about AF cocktails and Greek caf? frappe. Keeping the ouzo thoughts very very very ? far away.

Stay strong sweeties and have a great AF ?hump? day.

[tonstantweader]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hey girls,
I am now headed into my fourth week AF, and can hardly believe it. I had some cravings last night, but they are getting farther and farther apart. To all of you going on holiday/vacation, stay strong. I find that every day that passes, I think about alcohol less and less and I think of myself as a non-drinker more and more. And I do think we have to readjust our mindset, our view of ourselves, and even our worldview to those of a non-drinker.

It is liberating to be (almost) free of that negotiating, bargaining, and rationalizing with myself when I did drink. And every morning, it's a joy to wake up and realize my head is clear for the day.

BL, Ally, and Cailinog - you are all doing so great. Every time I think about slipping, I say to myself that I can't let them down!
Shue - I am so jealous. Going to Greece is one of my goals. perhaps some day!
Twinkle, enough, and SJ - so glad my supermarkets don't sell alcohol! And, yes, reminding ourselves that alcohol is really a poison to us is a good thought!

[allybee]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

I'm finding the best way to keep my AL monster voice quiet is to lie to it, telling it that I don't need to have wine today, but "maybe tomorrow". Say that everyday and tomorrow never comes For me, that seems to keep me from ruminating on how I may never drink again or those "it's not fair" feelings. Maybe this is a bad strategy in the long term (I'm still do new to this!), but it's helping me.

[cailinog74]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Allybee - the tactic that you use "maybe tomorrow" is one that I am using. It is working for us for far Girly so we will stick with it for the time being !
Shueaddict - like you with holidays, we are trying to plan our first foreign holidays with the kids for early next year and I am already worrying about how will I cope and like you, drink the bottles at night, sick as a dog the next day but yet give the whole day counting down to starting again.
tonstantweader - look at you heading into your fourth week AF - I have read and re-read your posts over the last few years and I can honestly say, you can see your courage coming to the fore day after day !
Twinkle and SJ - love reading your posts and your positive vibes : well done for you and for keeping all of us on the straight and narrow

Love to you all
Cailinog74 : DAY 7 8.24pm yeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaaaa !

[Clover]

All I Want Is 30 Days AF

Hello, Ladies! I haven't been around much the last few days. My niece, her hubby and their 2-month-old baby girl came to visit, and we had a lovely time! I actually let the "kids" go out for a few drinks and I stayed home and babysat my darling little great-niece two nights in a row. Wow! It feels like I'm the responsible adult again and I love it!

My daughter went back to school on Monday, too, so it's been hectic and she's hogging the computer. I did at least want to check in and say a quick "hey."

It looks like everyone is doing well and hanging in there. I understand that vacations and holidays can be rough. I still think of having my "relaxing" evening wine at the beach, watching the sun go down. But in reality, the last time I was at the beach, back in May, I was with some heavy boozers. I started guzzling champagne in the afternoon and by dinnertime I was shit-faced. I hardly ate a thing and don't even remember passing out in the bedroom. You can imagine how much fun the ride home the next day was. YUCK! I look forward to my next beach trip and guzzling seltzer or iced tea all afternoon!

I wish everyone a relaxing and sober "hump" day!