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    scared and afraid

    I'm coming off from a four day bender. My life is trashed right now and I'm scared. I always said my drinking never hurt anyone but myself, I never drove while drinking, I;d come home and start on a bottle wine and drank till I passed out. I'd get up the next day go to work, come home and open another bottle of wine. I said I drank to relax because my job was stressful, then I lost my job. This morning I realized that I had crossed my line in the sand, I realized that I had driven my car while drunk - something I said I'd never do. How did I come to this point?:upset:

    #2
    scared and afraid

    HI LADY :l I have to go to work now but I will check up on you when I get home. I am sending you hugs and kisses xxxxxxxoooooooooo :l Stay here you will only receive love and support xxxxxxxxxx:welcome:

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      #3
      scared and afraid

      Thanks Mia. I've gotten through day one but I'm so scared that I won't make it through tomorrow. My life has spiraled out of control and I don't know how to get it back on track.

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        #4
        scared and afraid

        Hello Cat Lady,

        I knew my drinking was getting progressively worse and that alcohol and I had to go our separate ways. This site, amongst other things, has helped me in so many positive ways and it can help you too. Please take a look around at all MWO has to offer and know you are definitely not alone. Welcome!
        2023 - focus, getting it done, and living the way it should be and being the person I need to be.

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          #5
          scared and afraid

          Hi Crazy CAt Lady :welcome: .... we have all been where you are at the moment and it IS possible to stop the madness. If you've got through day one, there is nothing to stop you getting through day two. What are you scared of?

          Make some plans for the next couple of days to keep yoursel busy and occupied and away from your normal patterns. And do you know about the toolbox thread?? It has helped many and I have it printed out and it is in my bag at all times!

          https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

          There is great support on this site, feel free to ask fofr help whenever you need it :l
          Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn

          Harriet Beecher Stowe

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            #6
            scared and afraid

            CCL, just wanted to welcome you and say that there is a lot of great support here, which I'm sure you know.

            If you can't do it on your own with the help of MWO, have you considered other options? Some people here seem to be having success with medications (see thread on front page). Others go to rehab or AA. I'm leaving those options open for myself depending on how I do.

            Have you thought about getting the MWO book and CDs Sheri mentioned? You can also buy lots of supplements that might help.......many different avenues........hope you can find something that works. We're all struggling, so you are not alone.

            PS

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              #7
              scared and afraid

              Starting day 2, trying to keep a bottle of water with me at all times. I spent a lot of time last night reading the tool kit. A lot of great advice in there.

              Thank you for everyone who reached out to me last night. I was in a very fragile place last night.

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                #8
                scared and afraid

                Hi CatLady,

                Congrats on day two--it gets easier. I just passed day 31. Keeping busy has really helped. I've been cleaning my house like mad. The neighbors must think I'm moving I've been throwing so much junk out. I was doing great while my husband was home to keep my accountable, but worried what would happen when he started traveling. Luckily I was a few weeks in and haven't had more than a passing--it might be nice to have a drink thought. It helps I'm losing weight and don't want to jeopordize that.

                Keep at it--stay strong and keep reading the boards. Whenever I was tempted I'm just read posts and that made the urge go away.

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                  #9
                  scared and afraid

                  Hi Jordan,

                  I can relate with the house cleaning. I'm thinking of moving to be closer to family but after 23 years in the same house I've collected a lot of crap. Definitely trying to bring order out of the chaos in my life.

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                    #10
                    scared and afraid

                    Getting into the danger zone..... Friday night, bored, depressed.......I don't want to wake up tomorrow feeling sick and ashamed.

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                      #11
                      scared and afraid

                      Thanks Zenstyle. The craving is starting to get intense, I just want to get in the car and go buy a bottle of wine. I have two cats a Siberian and a Snowshoe, sometimes I think they're the only reason I'm still alive.

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                        #12
                        scared and afraid

                        Your cats are gorgeous. I tried posting a picture of mine but apparently I'm computer impaired. My snowshoe came from an abusive home so he's a little timid, the Siberian is an absolute diva, hence her name ZsaZsa.

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                          #13
                          scared and afraid

                          ZsaZsa is 10 months old and weighs about 10 lbs. They tend to get to around 15-18 lbs. She's all long blond hair with green eyes, her markings make it look like she's wearing eyeliner.

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                            #14
                            scared and afraid

                            Hi crazy cat lady,

                            Don't think we've said hello yet, but I'm the crazy dog lady.

                            How you doing with those cravings hun:l

                            J x
                            :l
                            It could be worse, I could be filing.
                            AF since 7/7/2009

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                              #15
                              scared and afraid

                              I'm hanging in there. Ordered chinese for dinner so I didn't have to get in the car. I really just want a nice cold glass of sauvignon blanc. I think I've drunk 2 gallons of iced tea today.

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