Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

[Lola01]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Rise and shine. Day 3 here I come. Slept a tad better..had lots of dreams..good ones I think but lots and I don't remember them so well but I do remember the entire night up till then! Woohoo!
So aero I've been curious about kudzu and glutamate and I've seen lots on here and other sites about that. So I am looking into it. My question is this....what is a craving! Is it physiologically/pharmacologically based, psychologically based, or both(since these aren't necessarily different on a cellular level)? Use of herbs or extracts or whatever it might be suggests a physiological basis. To the best of my ability, my sense tells me that my desire for vino is to remove myself from social situations..not to loosen inhibitions in order to engage more fully..although I have clearly done that. That was more typ of my college days. But now...I seem to use it to escape people..including myself. I think the hardest thing for me is going to learn how to enjoy others again. Easiest thing will be to start with family bc they are naturally so lovable. Harder part will be to see if I can learn to enjoy other people more. I'm the reclusive type who generally feels annoyed by the mere presence of others. Strange bc my job demands much from me socially. I have tons of meetings and I am an instructor, and mentor. These require me to engage with others regularly and I can do it no problem bc it is related to my work...but boy oh boy..at the end of the day...I am quick to get away from all of it, climb in a bottle, and pull the cork in after me.....

So what I'm getting to is I wonder if there is anything chemical that will help that? Perhaps. I am still thinking this through As you all can plainly see.
Congrats All On continued success...pat, go skewer day 4!

[patricia]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hi, I'm not sure about cravings either - I have what I call fleeting thoughts which can change my mind in an instant. I don't seem to suffer from cravings as one would probably categorise them, nor withdrawals or the usual stuff although sweats were a problem in the night when I was drinking every day without a break but the minute I stop these go away. The L-glut I've taken this time (so far only 500mg) per day, seems to have calmed my brain - I have definitely been calmer since starting although didn't stop drinking until a couple of days of taking - but again, I've been stop, starting now since January - sometimes for up to two weeks, sometimes shorter. I consider myself extremely lucky not to have become addicted chemically, I think it is my behaviour/habits that I have to change. However, I am sure that my organs etc. are enjoying a well earned break!! I'm on constant watch for these fleeting thoughts . . . . . . Px

[Gdog]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hey Jon and Aero,
Three is a crowd for guys! I am with you. I find it interesting in that another place I do some posting is almost all women posting also. Now it is quite likely that more men struggle with alcohol, although I am not sure on that. It seems to me that it must be that the women have more courage, or willingness to be vulnerable. Or maybe they see the problem more clearly without societal blinders. Not really sure, but I am curious why it tilts towards women posting since there is no way they outnumber us as far as alcohol issues. Maybe not important at one level. Just find it interesting.

[aerojef]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hey guys!

Well, a craving for me is if I suddenly find myself really wanting a drink. It can come on when I find myself in certain situations where I had been drinking before. I usually drank alone also. Here's an example. Last night after the wife went to bed I watched one of my favorite television shows, one where I usually watched on the computer when the wife wasn't home. I always had a drink when I watched it. I found myself half-getting up to go get one - it felt so strange to not have a drink in my hand, so out of place that I felt something was wrong. It took a conscious effort to remind myself that this time I was going to enjoy the show totally sober. Destiniey posted that she got a craving every time she was driving home from work, and it took a HUGE effort to actually drive by the liquor store on the way home without stopping. To me it's just that incredible urge to do something with alcohol that deep down you KNOW you shouldn't do on this program.

Yes, it is on a physiological level, as well as psychological. We're so used to our habit patterns that it's difficult to change, but also our brains are wired to combine alcohol with certain situations as well. As far as how Kudzu and Glutamate work physiologically, here's a link to another thread on this forum that might explain it in more detail. I found it fascinating.

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f6...ned-46772.html

Needless to say, I reminded myself of you guys last night and thought of the shame of being left behind if I had to say I was starting over so quickly, so I didn't give in.

Patricia, you're totally right for staying vigilant for those thoughts - every time I have them I say to myself, "is it worth losing my marriage and my house if I pour a drink? I didn't think so" and that usually helps. Just remind yourself how bad AH is for you and what you stand to lose (like having to tell us you caved) and you'll be fine.

Here's to day 4!

[aerojef]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Oh, here's another thing I found that helps me. Since I'm so used to working on the computer with a drink in front of me, I discovered that pouring a substitute drink helps. It makes me feel like I'm not necessarily "abstaining". My favorite substitute is a glass of club soda or mineral water on ice with a little lime juice in it. Yummy!

It's always a good idea to substitute a good habit for a bad one, rather than just dropping the bad habit. Kind of like why ex-smokers chew gum - gotta have something in the mouth. Maybe I'm off base here, but it works for me!

[Lola01]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks you all. This is just what I needed. Headed home early today...gonna pass the stores and not look back...well today anyway. I also had a good experience today that I realized I wasn't scheduling meetings around my hangover schedule. Felt really free. I figure I'm going to have a lot more time when I'm not drinking. Now I need to figure out how to fill it. That is a high class problem though so I won't complain. I also feel the pull to be accountable here and it is a stong influence indeed if it keeps me away from the wicked -and sometime oh so beloved- vino. I may relapse in ciggies though. I've been good giving those up but having a hankering for 1 or 2. Good news is that I hardly smoke at all when Im not drinking...when drinking it is a different matter.
Yup..maybe need a smoke. Got one hidden in my top drawer. I'm smokin it tonight. Too rough to go from the Jim Morrison to the mitt Romney lifestyle (without the car elevator of course) all at once...which kind of brings me to another point...ever feel like you just love the batboy culture of drinkin? I sure did...need to learn a new way of thinking perhaps.
Thanks for all the support that is flying around. It is really wonderful.
My mantra for the day...cravings (whatever their pathogenesis) don't last as long as hangovers..thanks for that!,,
Smiles ad keep it up all...you're doing it!!
L

[Lola01]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Whoops.. Meant badboy culture Of drinkin...not batboy. Don't think they necessarily have a type...
Ha!

[Destiniey]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Aero...that was a great link....thanks! I am reading a book now that you might find interesting. It's "End Your Addiction Now...THe Proven Nutritional Supplement Program That Can Set You Free" by Charles Gant, MD and Greg Lewis, MD.
You were right on with replacing a bad habit with a good one. When I quit smoking (2 years ago next month) I really had to change my whole lifestyle..I was amazed at how many things were triggers for me....talking on the phone...getting in the car....waking up and they sky was blue...ha...you name it..it triggered the craving! Getting the AL out of my daily routine is the same way. Removing the AL out of my house since I drank alone at home was a BIG help. I am glad that you opted to have the club soda with lime last night...proud of you. Day 4 for us.....YAY!

[aerojef]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks, just got home from work. I think I'll look into that book - as a health care provider, that sounds right up my alley.

Just relaxing now, the wife seems to have calmed down a bit and is cordial if not friendly. I might still have a chance. Although, she changed her Facebook relationship status to "it's complicated" and is getting several requests as to what is going on. Hopefully she doesn't tell the whole world everything.

So far she only described the issues we have with one of our mutual friends, who went through a similar situation a couple of years ago (with AH) and is doing great, and wants to be my greatest fan!

More is better, especially one in person I guess.

Lola: Try taking a different route home if you can - then you don't have to look at your old favorite stores. Also, if you have some extra free time now, you can always exercise more or work on a hobby - or start that hobby you've always wanted to take up.

Off for dinner, I'll check back in a little later.

Yay, Day 4 almost done! We're all doing great!

[Lola01]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks aero. Seems like your hard work is paying off. Willbe pullin for ya! Alternate route not possible without 20 mi detour (think rural new england) but I actually did stop in my favorite store on the way home. Got 4 apples and a handmade pizza (they have a great deli). Didn't go down the usual isles. That was today. I,was feeling strong but it is so variable. Got home and had some tempting thoughts but found something to do...I agree...more time on the elliptical seems to be in order. Thanks for sharing your good advice. It all makes perfect sense. I guess I just have this sneaking feeling that I won't always feel so,strong. When that happens....nit sure...still working on that perfect plan...or pretty good plan, or shot in the dark plan. Hmmm...no silver bullet I suppose...
I not sure how much you share with your wife about your perpective, but keep letting your wife know how much you are doing. I suspect she would tend more towards patience and understanding if she knew that what you are doing is really hard and that you value her enough to do your best ...I think the thought of a break up where my spouse advertised the reasons why (bc curious minds naturally want to know) is truly terrifying. For me, It was really hard to start to talk anout things here and its safe here!! People here get it!
Keep it up aero. Happy day 4--or is it 5 now? You cn do it! Focus on the positive and don't think about what you are "missing" by passing up the drink. Remember what Carr says...it's just poison.
Smiles,
T

[Destiniey]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

omgod...can you please take me to your store.....the whole experience seems so nice!

[aerojef]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks Lola, I appreciate it! Actually the wife and I are getting along pretty well today. I had to teach at the local college for a few hours today, and she spent most of the time I was gone reading stuff on MWO! She is more supportive of me than she was, and is actually very surprised and happy I'm doing this. Maybe there's hope yet! We even went for a walk together tonight.

I started exercising again today also - ran 1 mile and speed-walked another on the treadmill at work, and did some leg presses and extensions in the gym. Felt really good! After the workout, I really think that it helps with the cravings. Gonna keep it up and drop a few pounds while I'm at it.

Day 5 coming up, almost to the 1-week goal! Next is 30 days, then shooting for 3 months.

Nobody give in! I'm wiped, off to bed soon - or rather the couch, since I'm still banished AFAIK. Good thing it's comfortable - me and cat do just fine there.

[patricia]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Morning all

Well crawled through to day 5 - struggled a bit but sense won . . . . . . Px

[Lola01]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Well...another beautiful day..hello day four. Congrats all on making it this far. Dest, too funny. Yes...it is a bucolic New England little country store with farm stand and organic produce and hime made soup....Good stuff man!
I am really impressed aero on how you shared WMO threads with your wife. I don't have that kind of courage...yet....maybe never. Good for you for turning to exercise...I completely agree that it helps with my cravings. I feel pent up when I crave and I need a release and it seems to have worked for me in the short run.....ahhh...the importance of building good habits...
Must admit that last night I started having morbid thoughts of moderation. Talk me down from this cliff!
I have done that in the past-especially with beer so I have a sense I can do it- but other times, beer leads to wine and then....well you know me...it's all over so it is not a good idea...talk me down???
Congrats pat...we are on the right path....let's make a pact...get to 7, then 30 at which time we can jump to the 30 day thread....whose with me???
L

[patricia]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hi lolab

I'm scared to commit to anything - just ODAT at the moment - but I'm secretly think YES YES YES pX