Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

[mby82266]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

I found this sight 2 years ago. I cant even say how many times I have tried and failed to give up drinking. Friday I did something I have never done before. I had a blackout and passed out. Sad part was no one noticed how drunk I was. I had conversations with people made dinner, talked on the phone and even did laundry. I have no memory of any of it. Thank god I didn't decide to drive in that state! It really scared the crap out of me! Today is day 3 AF. It sounds terrible but I hope that fear stays with me. It is what is motivating me to stay sober!! I will make it through this day!!

[iamaquitter28]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hi mby: I too have had my fair share (or unfair depending how you look at it) of blackout nights. I'll wake up in the morning like what the hell happened after dinner. Luckily most times it's a simple as we sat down and watched a show, gave my daughter a bath and put her to bed before taking my butt to bed. Unfortunately, there's those other times that I can't even bear to hear what happened. The embarrassment I felt after nights like that unfortunately never stuck with me long enough to lead me to quit. I hope different for you. It is scary to think of the things you could do/may have done under the spell of a blackout! My final straw with AL is the pain I have in my right side and the CONSTANT heartburn that I know is related to drinking as much as I do. I live in fear that I will not live to see my daughter graduate high school or go to college. And I think about the pain she'd feel for the rest of her life if she lost me! And now I'm crying :-(
Congrats on 3 days AF! Keep on the horse and stay close to MWO. This place is a lifesaver!

[mby82266]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Iama, thanks for your encouragement. The pain you are describing is probably related to your drinking, Your liver is on your right side under your rib cage. I too experience this pain when I drink excessively. I can give you hope. My doctor told me that after 6 weeks AF my liver will start to repair itself. Try not to focus on what your daughters life will be like without you. Push your self to see the future you deserve. every day AF is another day with her and there are so many positive events in the future!

[mby82266]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Day 4, AF wow its been a long time since I made it this far! the world is a brighter place and I slept for the first time in days. I feel really good but I know better than to get overconfident. just for today I will not drink. Have a good day everyone out there.

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Well guess who's back! Sure is hard writing this first post.... Husband of 20 years is fed up... teen and pre-teen sons both pretty done with Mom's constant drinking. Basically 1 year after my last failed attempt.... Here I am...and I have to admit here and now things gotten pretty bad. Read and re-read my first few pages of posts.... Nothing much has changed and change is needed.... For me.
Enough!

[NoSugar]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hi, Enough and welcome back!

Even though you aren't brand new to MWO, we'd love to have you in the Newbies Nest - it is such a great place to get this done. It is a very active thread so you almost always will get a response fairly quickly. There also have been additions to the toolbox you might want to check out.

It sounds like you've reached a breaking point -- I also finally got sick enough of myself and my life to get this done.

Read back a few days in the Newbies Nest and meet the active posters and then jump on in and introduce yourself, if you feel like it. Just yesterday several of us who have been posting for awhile added some brief bios.

Anyway, hope to see you over there! NS

[witts end]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

hi enough glad you came back
where all here to reach the same goal .....af we will all do it with you

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

New beginnings

My first sober day and evening in quite some time. Came home from work and enjoyed a glass and a half of wine.... Leaving some in the bottle. Tossed and turned last night, but was fortunate to get a little nap in befor work today. I will be here on conquering for a while... It helps with accountability. Thanks to witts end and no sugar for their posts.
Maybe this time Enough.... Is Enough😇

[Snapdragon]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Enough!;1546065 wrote: My first sober day and evening in quite some time. Came home from work and enjoyed a glass and a half of wine.... Leaving some in the bottle. Tossed and turned last night, but was fortunate to get a little nap in befor work today. I will be here on conquering for a while... It helps with accountability. Thanks to witts end and no sugar for their posts.
Maybe this time Enough.... Is Enough��

Hello Enough - remember me? We were both struggling together (and yep - I back again too!) Managed to get 3 months AF under my belt and then caved in again. So today I am back on Day one - and this time I'm determined not to cave again.

It's good to have you back - and you CAN do it this time! Snap x

[Turnagain]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Enough! Soooooooo happy and relieved you are back.... This thread has done wonders for a lot of folks in encouraging them to deal with addiction. Snap and MBY it's good you are chiming in.

The early days of detox and withdrawal are certainly miserable to the nth degree but on the flip side it is a good and necessary result of your body cleansing itself of the toxins that alcohol produces. You are beginning to heal.

Enough....are you doing a taper or are you thinking you will try to moderate? I truly hope you are looking toward leaving alcohol behind once and for all....truly enough. I can tell you living AF is more than day and night compared to the darkness of drinking. Normal, AF living is true freedom and is a joy. It is attainable and easily maintained by understanding and accepting that alcohol - in any amount- will always produce a toxic reaction in every system of our bodies.

Keep going everyone....life without the damage and limitations of alcohol is now yours.

[witts end]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

how is everyone going

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Turn ... You have been AF for over two years? If so great for you.
Snap... Of course I remember you! We had many, many touching and motivating conversations. Please stay with me here! So great to hear from you... and sorry you are also having a tough time. Myself... I am looking for a lifestyle change with alcohol. Not sure exactly what that definition is yet. But a change from daily drinking and overdoing it. I want to be a good influence to my children, husband .. and feel in control of the path I am taking in life. Stop the incessant thinking about booze and all the silly nonsense that goes with it.
E!

[Snapdragon]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Enough!;1546294 wrote: Turn ... You have been AF for over two years? If so great for you.
Snap... Of course I remember you! We had many, many touching and motivating conversations. Please stay with me here! So great to hear from you... and sorry you are also having a tough time. Myself... I am looking for a lifestyle change with alcohol. Not sure exactly what that definition is yet. But a change from daily drinking and overdoing it. I want to be a good influence to my children, husband .. and feel in control of the path I am taking in life. Stop the incessant thinking about booze and all the silly nonsense that goes with it.
E!

Hi Enough - I feel exactly the same way - as mentioned before, I managed 3 months AF and this was purely down to taking Antabuse. It changed everything for me (as it has a few others here). It takes away the incessant mind chatter about shall I or shan't I - you can't and that's it, no willpower required.

Those 3 months were the BEST I had in years. I felt so good (and looked fantastic - lost weight, skin looked better) and my relationships with hub and kids was amazing. So why you ask did I throw it all away?

Bad timing and pure stupidity. We had been on holiday for a week and I had run out of Antabuse and was waiting to see my GP to get my next prescription when I got back. I wasn't unduly worried as I had no inclination to drink at that point. Then Wham - shit happened and my first reaction was 'I need a drink - just one and then I will be back on track'. Had I had still been taking Antabuse, this would never have happened.

Of course then, because I drank that day, I thought - well I might as well have a glass of wine the next, and the next. Then when I finally got my Antabuse I kept putting it off and putting it off taking it. It's been a month since I took it - a pure month of hell. Back to not sleeping, back to drunken arguments, face full of spots, depression, anxiety and the list goes on.

Well I've had enough too. Yesterday I started the Antabuse again and I feel better already. Second day AF and I'm already feeling happier and positive. This has been a big learning curve and now I know not to be complacent again. Alcohol ruins lives, ruins relationships, ruins health and ruins looks - I don't want it back in my life again.

It's great to have you back on board and look forward to hearing your plan - and helping you along the way with it. :l

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Snap... Thanks so much for sharing your story. Like you putting off taking your prescription... I have been putting off getting back on track with all kinds of excuses. Can't stop now there are Christmas and then New Years party's....it's spring break ... My birthdays coming up.... A week vacation.... This keeps going all year until BAM... It's end of August... Only three months til Christmas. Makes no sense. Same as my very first post.... I am at the point where " why buy a 750mil.... when I can buy 2 cheap.... 1.5 L for the same price". No enjoyment... Just drinking to drink.
Stay tuned.... Day 2 no hangover.
E!

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

I'm so happy to see you back! :goodjob: