Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Shue be proud of yourself for going 4.5 days. Keep stringing these non-drinking periods together. It's a hell of a lot healthier than drinking every day. And you're keeping your focus on eventually not drinking. The only bad thing now would be to give up and just start drinking all the time again.

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Just checking in after a long day, and I've got 2 more long days ahead. I might not really get here to post until Monday, but please know that I'm thinking of you all. :groupluv:

[akazia21]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Just called the Quitline-to quit my nasty smoking habit. It should be much easier to do AF-they are sending me some patches to help with the beginning-how I do love my psychological crutches! I feel happy and determined right now to kick both of these addicitions in the a** LOL.

Thinking of you too FlyAway

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Celebrating "ironish" will power

Hi Ladies...
Power shopping today for "cottage groceries" which translates to we have to buy everything needed for 1 week for a small army... wow that was fun (and expensive).

Went for dinner and had ice tea for the first time since I was I think twelve! Now sipping a half of glass of wine and not craving any more! We also bought 3 bottles of non alcohol sparkling wines (for sangria) and non alcoholic beer in case I felt like a beer. So I planned and am prepared to stay sober this next week.

I feel many of us are genuinely changing our patterns (even with some slips). three glasses does not need to turn into a 3 day sloshy bender. 1 glass can be 1 glass... thats awesome!

Mya... best of luck with your tests

Getting there... 8! 8! 8!

Shue... Nice to here you are finding "new" better habits and great job catching yourself and getting back on track

Aka... I devour books ... I read usually one a week so I can help with lots of great reads.
Not sure if you like heavy or easy, but here are a couple

Tuesdays with Morrie- easy
Cleopatra the Life- heavy- fascinating story (non fict)
Empire Falls - just finished it great story
Kite Runner- Heavy
The secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd- great book (easy)
The book of Negroes (great/ heavy... long read)
Everything is Illuminated (heavy)
The Templar Legacy


I am always on the lookout for fab reads too... so open to your suggestions ( i read everything from theoretical Physic and simple great stories to historical fiction, I brought Ulysses by Joyce and a Salanger with me this week.

Now that we played "the ex wino book club"... hey I like the sound of that!... That could be our book

Sooo... I am off for a bit. Another super early sunrise wake up tomorrow. It will all be worth it when I am out in my canoe Sunday morning while the water is smooth and everyone else is a sleep

AND... I AM NOT HUNG OVER!!! Novel flippin concept!

Hugs..
Enough!
xoxo

:l

[akazia21]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

enough -well, the two books I read most recently were East of Eden and also Freedom by Jonathan Franzen. I'm not sure if he has any other books out there but it was a good read! I'll probably be able to think of more tomorrow-I'm tired but obviously not sleeping!
I think I'll go find Empire Falls tomorrow-my money is going on books not alcohol right now! Well that and pretty dresses for my daughter
Night everyone-keep it up!

[Queenbug]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hello lovelies sorry for disappearing...just spent some time catching up...WOW Enough!!!! 20 days is incredible...well done!
I'm feeling pretty rough right now....been really hard to cope with my friend's crisis and all the fall out...she is in hospital on a ward now and really seems to have given up...her eldest daughter is still at home but the others have all now gone to stay with their dad...my house is quiet again and today I feel like giving it a good sort out...I'm very tired, I've had literally no sleep for a while and I feel very strange. I managed to hold back on drinking for most of this because I've been driving a lot, but late last night I caved and drank 2 huge glasses of red wine, very quickly and then I cried...I think I needed that (the cry not the wine!)...feel so very sad for this family...and my friend is such a lovely woman who always helps and cares for others...right now she is just so broken and withdrawn.....

Deep breath....anyway...think I'm going to have a bath and sleep before I do anything else....not going out today (apart from a dogwalk)...water, try and eat something good, supplements, rest and reflection...am pissed off it's Day 1 again...but these latest slip ups are in no way the same as previously because they don't involve days of continual drinking before starting again...just a few glasses and then straight back on AF...I've learnt so much already...and want this journey to continue...I might need to start a bthread 'Will I ever get past Day 10!?!'...seems to be my sticking point :bang

sorry am rambling....need sleep really badly....back later...have a good Saturday lovlies...stay strong catch you later xx

[noxy]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Morning all, well is Saturday again and all is good!! Well done everyone for showing that you have some controll. I guess that I have not really allowed myself to be tempted by withdrawing from our usual social routines ... my hubby is super supportive and keeps telling me that I am a much nicer person when I am SOBER. Speaking of books , I have a book called Healing the addicted brain by Harold C Urschel MD ... has some rather graphic images ( MRI scans) on what the brain looks like ! Gosh ... not very good news ... brain shrinks ! I often worry about the effects that alcohol has had on my brain, sometimes I cant even remember simple things ! The good news is that we can recover from some of the damage . On a lighter note ... the nice thing about being sober is that I can actually read the book, used to read the same page over and over ! I watched some family dvd 's the other day and I am rather tipsy in some of them.... tut tut... dont ever want to be that person again ! Hope you all have a Super Saturday ..... :h:h and :l:l from noxy

[Juja]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Queen,

I am so sorry about your friend, as well as her family, who must be going through hell. I am sorrry for you, too, because she's your friend. Damn, it's all so hard.

I hope you get some good rest and wake up feeling a bit better.

Thinking about you.....:l

Juja

[Vini]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Well, Friday night proved to be my downfall......

Had an awful day at work (to the point of almost being in tears) and was craving AL all day. I bought a huge jar of l-glut and am going to start on that. DH came home, brought company with him and my favourite white wine. I know he was trying to be nice but it didn't help. At all. I had a glass which I drank very slowly. But then I had another. Then a scotch. Then another.

And this morning I have a headache and I am so mad at myself, why did I do that? It didn't change my day one little bit and now I am back to Day 1 again. Grrrr. So be it - day 1 it is.

You are all inspiring. noxy, yikes, hope your results come back and it's nothing. Queen, 10 day! You made it twice as far as me, sorry for your troubles.

Off to have some water, some supplements and greet the day - stay strong!

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Good morning!!!!
Queen sorry about your friend that must be really tough.

Aka... I read Freedom (thought ok)- Franzen also wrote a book called Corruptions Sp? If you liked his style you will like Empire Falls.

Everyone... stay strong.. will check in soon.

It is a beautiful sober morning!

Enough!
xoxo

[akazia21]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Queen - so sorry about your familiy. Don't beat yourself up over the wine, glad to hear you are getting right back on it. My downfall after 36 days sober was that someone gave me one of those mini wine bottles for a xmas present, I drank that and everything was fine (I thought) and I started right back on it, slowly at first and then it crept up on me.
Vini - It is hard to have wine around, I can't imagine -that as mentioned above is always my downfall - sounds like you are getting right back on it - good job!

My house is an alcohol free zone for the indefinite future-I am on day 12/13 (?) I lost count already lol. I just know I can't have it around me at all. I think I last took a piece of antabuse wed, I'm feeling good enough to not take it right now so we'll see. I also deleted a bunch of people off my phone and haven't been answering too many phone calls of people I used to drink with. I'm not at the point where I can hang out with them and watch them drink while I don't. At some point I will talk to them about it and see if we can find other things to do than drink together, but someohow for this particular group I doubt it! Fortunately I have sober friends too, even some other non-drinking alcoholic friends so it should be fine. Have a great day, I think I will take my daughter to the pool-still so hot here!
Enough - cool I am off to the book store today!

[Queenbug]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hello peeps...
Thank you Juju, Vini, Enough and Akasia and everyone else for your lovely comments and support.
I finally woke up at 4pm and have taken it very easy today. I've rested, drank a ton of water and lemon/ginger, eaten very little because I feel very sluggish and bloated, walked a bit with the dog, and spent a lot of time just thinking on the events of not just the last few days, but the last month or so...something really big has shifted in me...I'm really hoping it's to do with what I'm trying to achieve with getting my life sorted a bit...but it does involve huge feelings of shock, fear and anxiety...feel quiet and sad....but I spose the important thing is that I've put the brakes on with drinking. This time last month I would have just chucked more wine down my neck to cope with feeling like this and recent events...thinking that it's the way I 'cope'...but actually I'm not coping at all...just guzzling L-Glut and white knuckling it til after 10pm so I can't go out and buy a bottle...
Read a really helpful post earlier about what happens when the lack of sugar hits you...really making me think...my 10 day losing it thing and complete exhaustion is probabely that...so plan for the next 10 days is...understand it and get past it to Day11...
sad sad sad sad tonight...
Vini...Day 1 nearly done...let's get back to it matey

xx

[Queenbug]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Morning...beautiful morning here...just about to go walking by the river with the dog...am feeling much better today...was thinking yesterday that I had wasted a whole day by just resting and thinking and crying, but looking back I think that I was also learning loads. I'm much more aware of what's happening to my body/spirit/emotions now on this AF journey and weirdly feel a bit braver.
I have told all my children that I'm doing this now..I've been hesitating because I'm ashamed...but I did it with all of them but seperately, not sure why, and they are all gently offering support and understanding which has helped. I'm worried about what their dad and his wife will say to them if/when they tell him...but that's another story and for dealing with another time.
My friend is still the same....I'm heartbroken but realise now that I have been as good a friend as I can be to her and her family and will continue to be...but me drinking won't change stuff or help them, just make me feel worse...I'm looking forward to when she is well so that we can laugh together again, and I can tell her that I'm AF.
What have I learnt? .......that when the shit hits the fan....run, duck, dive, get an umbrella, run a bath...erm? turn the fan off!....but most importantly...don't open the wine...NOT EVEN FOR ONE!!!!
Hope everyone has had a good safe weekend....:wave: xx

[Clover]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Queenbug, hang in there. I've had quite a few "Day 1s" since coming here, too. I hope July 9th was my last one! The important thing is you're still here and still trying and you CAN do this! It's great that you told your children, that is an important step. I can't tell you how many times my daughter got mad at me for drinking and how many times I thought she would just stop loving me. Awful feelings for us both! But our kids do love us very much and they just don't want us to be hurt, sick .... or dead. That is a terrifying thought to a kid, whether they are 7 or 17. Of course, we must stop drinking primarily for OURSELVES but I keep thinking that this is for my children as well. Great to see you, Queen!!

[Queenbug]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks Clover...good to see you too...and you are right...hiding away does no good....one of my daughters comes back on Thursday after gap year travelling, and she's the one who has really been most angry/scared at me/for me for the last few years. It's been hard knowing that...I remember feeling the same about my mum and we still struggle at times....really tried to set my life up differently so that they wouldn't experience some of this...and it's been a huge agony and shock to me to realise that over the last two years I've been doing some of those things to my own kids without being able to stop myself. I told her early this am in a long text, being honest, saying that I've slipped a bit but almost completed 10 days twice, and am back on it...and her answer came through at 5a.m....thats awesome mum, I'm so so proud of you, can't wait to see you...
Told my other daughter yesterday afternoon and my son this morning...to admit my struggle to them has been very hard....but they just listened and said...sounds great mum.
I feel like I've climbed a mountain this last few weeks....
Just munching on an L-glut sandwich...onwards and upwards eh? xx