Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

[Clover]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Enough, it might help if you eat something yummy, something you really love to eat, instead of drinking. I find that the end of the day, right after work, when I'm tired and hungry is a very vulnerable time for me. If I very quickly get something to eat, the craving for wine subsides. Get yourself a treat, relax in front of the television or read a good book. Hang in there, we all know exactly how it feels!!

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks Clover...
drove home with the music louder then should be legal with the sunroof open even though it's a million degrees and took half an adivan ( sp). Settled down once home and going to take advise and grill some salmon for a late summer dinner.

Drinking grapefruit cranberry mixed with tonic? Slightly tart.. Not bad.
Enough... I must make it to day 6.

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Screw the salmon! Leftovers sound fine
Enough!

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Ok... Is anyone out there joining us on this crazy ride?
Enough

[shueaddict]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Sorry Enoungh! Time difference is big - your last post was on 5AM my time. I really hope you did well .

Anyway, please eat something before you leave work (anything but apples - they're guaranteed to make you hungry in half an hour). This has been one of my biggest triggers - arrive home from work crancky, tired, hungry, thirsty - wine made it all go away. I would normally have half a bottle before I even served dinner.

:h

[not tonight]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Good morning Enough,
Your posts came in at 3am my time so I wasn't able to respond. I hope you made it through the evening strong. I think Clover's suggestion of having something to eat is a good one. I know I am most vulnerable in the evenings when I am hungry and my blood sugar is low. As there is so much sugar in wine out bodies are not just in withdrawal from booze, but also sugar. A secret stash of very nice chocolates might help at the end of the day when you have a strong craving or would like and end of the day reward. I am going to buy a box for myself today.

Today is day 5 for me. Looks like it's going to be a beautiful day! Peace!

[shueaddict]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

starting day 5

Spirit - what a clever little idea!! Will most definitely apply.

LifeChange, Spirituality could be really helpful, but you have to get in tune to it, the signs are subtle. But you will find them if you look for them. Most importantly it has to come from you, you need to take the first step and start praying. I come from a very religious family ( Christian orthodox) and despite not going to church I still pray and I still occasionally get reassuring ?signs? - there are no straightforward signs, it just how you interpret them . Sometimes, it is just a feeling ? or a new thought. Dreams are particularly interesting since they are projections of our subconscious ? Almost each time I got wasted in the last month I dreamt that I was driving my car and lost control or could not see and crashed.

Three times I have made a promise to God that I would not drink that day and I did not keep it. I cannot tell you just how bad I felt the night, waking up in sweat, trying to remember the details of the evening, and remembering I broke that promise. This time around I have not promised anything, I just prayed for strength. The morning this happened I went into the forest with the dog and all linden trees were in bloom - the wonderful smell overpowering ? I took that as a good sign ? the smell of the linden trees is particularly meaningful to me and I have gone to great lengths before to find it. This is the first time IT found ME.

Anyway, I rambled enough, better get back to work. Thank you all for your thoughts, I?ll check in again at my parents.
Stay strong.

[Snapdragon]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Day 3

So sorry we couldn't be with you during your time of need Enough - the time difference is a problem - but I hope you managed to make it to Day 6. Post and let us know how you are.

Well Day 3 for me. I can honestly say that if I hadn't arranged to go out with friends last night and drive my car I would have given in and drunk wine! The craving was so bad on my way home from work, I was debating all sorts - ringing and asking to change plans so that someone else drove, saying I couldn't make it, or perhaps just having one glass (but then I would have to stop off at a store on the way home to buy more!) In the end, we all arrived and drank cokes or lime and soda and by the time we starting to eat our meal and my friends shared a bottle of wine, the craving had gone away. Thank goodness!

I have had an incredible headache for the last 12 hours or so - has anyone else experienced this? Also feel very tired.

Things are really bad with my fiance - he is finding it hard to forgive me for the drunken (me not him) row we had on Tuesday and has basically said he doesn't know if he wants to go through with our wedding (which should be on 5th August). I told him I really do intend to not drink this time - but he's heard it all before, so why should he believe me now?

It's difficult because this the time when I would normally hit the bottle - but if I do then our future together is over (we've been together for almost ten years). Not drinking ever again is hugely important - and I'm very frightened I'm not going to be able to do it.

I love the idea of putting salt & pepper into your drink so that you won't want to drink it but can hold it and look part of the party. If we do eventually get married, I will definately be sprinkling some into my glass of champagne at the reception!!

Hope everyone else here is well - I love reading your posts and your support.

Snap x

[shueaddict]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

day 5

Snap - I was going to say that unlike some super energetic people in this thread I actually had a faint headache for a few days now and I am not at my super chirpy self; in fact I would say I have felt bit low and lethargic, I dragged my feet at the gym and felt like doing zero cardio. I bought some suplements (vitamin B + serotonin) . Whatever it is it sure beats the hangover fog.

Hang in there for your fincee, the only way for him to believe you is for you to stay focused on your AF track. Don't give up on him, or yourself. Can you picture your life without him? He's been by you for 10 years so he must care about you but it would hurt him if you were to take that for granted.

Big hug:l

[not tonight]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Snapdragon - great job on day 3, and for staying sober when you were out with your friends. Forgiveness can be hard, but do you think your fiance might have more confidence in your commitment to sobriety if you showed him this thread? Perhaps it could give him some insight into the struggle, and your mind set that you do want to change, you don't want to keep drinking. Also that you are not alone in your struggle. My husband is one of those people that can have one drink and stop. I know he see's my habit as a lack of willpower. He will say to me "what you need to do is buy one bottle of wine on Friday and decide that it has to last you all weekend." Oh, okay dear, never thought of it like that.

Anyway, I will keep you in my thoughts. Just don't pick up a bottle. Stay to the course and come here when the struggle seems overwhelming.

[not tonight]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

I found this on line and thought I would share it. It is a web article from Glamour Magazine listing various celebrities that either never drank or are gave it up. For me it highlights the fact that drinking is not glamours, nor a means to being successful in life. I particularly like Jada Pinkett Smith's, as she admits to having had a 2 bottle a day wine habit before she went cold turkey. Thought this might be good to share. Teetotal Celebrities | Celebrities who don't drink (Glamour.com UK)

Happy sober Friday everyone!

[Snapdragon]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hi Not Tonight - many thanks for posting the celebrities that don't drink link - I was really interested to read it. Particularly the stars which I thought loved to party like Kelly Osborne and her attitude that if she has one glass of wine she will probably go home and get S*** Faced!! I think she is probably a bit like all of us!

What you said about your husband suggesting you have a bottle of wine to last the weekend - that's exactly the atttitude my fiance has. He can take or leave drink so really can't understand my problem. He said to me today that he wants me to be able to go out and have a couple of glasses of wine with him over a meal or with friends and he is adament that I'm not an alcoholic (I think he thinks it would be terrible for me to admit that because who wants a wife who's an alcoholic?!!)

I said to him that OK - I'm not an alcoholic, but that as alcohol is causing so many problems in our relationship that it is time I gave it up completely and this means he has to help me by not offering me wine when we go out - it has to be all or nothing. He has agreed to this and even suggested that we no longer have alcohol in the house - even though he sometimes enjoys a glass of cider or a beer, he said that from now on he'll just drink juice.

Its early days so let's see - but I am inspired by so many people on this site who have managed to pick up their lives and really start to live again.

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Good morning ( or evening to my overseas friends ) !

Yes, after a bit of stressful start to my evening yesterday...

I MADE IT! DAY 6
This is a milestone day for me as I have NEVER made it past 6 in the past 15 or so years!

I figured out a few things yesterday that were triggers
1... Yes, need to eat something sweet before I leave work
2... I literally have to walk through a bar area before getting to my car where I usually park.
Will park somewhere else and take different route. Seeing yummy wine when I am most vunerable
Is too tempting.
3... Need to have something to cook that does not require sauces, or to much time in the kitchen
4... When I get home I need to take 10 before plowing into Mom/ chef/ sheriff mode
This just stresses me out to much.

Please see the next few posts... I really appreciate your late night thoughts and Clover thanks for your comments
Enough!

[lifechange]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

i hope everyone made it to their next day!
how are you, enough?
i think shue is right about eating something just after work.
maybe packing some sort of treat to celebrate the end of the work day. and having some sort of drink sub for the ride home. do you have time after work before having to be at home where you can chill out for a few moments? i don't always, but when i do it really helps to take a few deep breaths before jumping into the next thing.

i just picked up my boyfriend from the airport (he'd been away working in spain) and after telling me a bit about his trip he said the only thing he'd bought is a bottle of veterano brandy for me! i told him i'm not drinking anymore and that he could give it to his friend whose rum gift i'd downed a few evenings ago. he was mildly disappointed about my having drunk it-- he said he'd thought of hiding it before going away but then thought, "oh she'd never do that!"-- then he said, "ok we'll stop drinking".
i'm happy to have his support.

i always thought my husband drove me to drink. that i couldn't handle our relationship, how we communicated-- or didn't, etc. etc. and for the first while after i left him i felt ok. now 5 years into a new relationship i realize i'm in almost the same boat, as far as drinking goes, but with a completely different, very lovely man. so whose problem is it?
i've known this for some time but yesterday it hit me over the head.

i guess i just want to say i feel strong today and thank you all again for being there.

since i'm so new, this just being my 3rd day, i don't feel like i can say so much to encourage you all who are further along.
but i wish everyone strength to make it through another day!

[lifechange]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

CONGRATS on day 6, enough!!
i guess i was writing at the same time as everyone else---
i need some time to catch up with you all.

yea!!