Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Juja;1152792 wrote: Snap--wine's an insidious, evil thing. One glass, and bam!, it's over. I know exactly how you feel.
I know how your finacee feels, too: I don't like the "me" that drinks. I talk too much, say things I wouldn't normally say, and become a bit too honest with people to the point of being unnecessarily mean. I hate the looks on their faces when I start to feel the buzz.
It's not worth it, Snap, it's just not worth it.

Juja, I feel the same way about myself when drinking. My DH gets happy when he's drinking. I get happy at first, then I decide that I need to tell everyone everything that they do wrong and become waaaaay too honest. So embarrassing.

[Vini]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Thanks for the welcome, FlyAway. Actually, Day 1 was pretty easy but my husband is away so I could make lots of changes to the routine. For one thing, there is no white wine and no scotch in the house - removing temptation makes things much easier! There was beer and red wine but it wasn't TOO difficult to avoid them. Whenever I thought about drinking, I just did something else. Yesterday I painted my front doors (been meaning to do that for years), made myself a lovely, healthy dinner and had a glass of cranberry, soda and a lemon wedge in a large wineglass. I have today and tomorrow alone so I think I will be able to do 3 days AF, we'll see.

But he comes home on Wednesday and that will be the test. I find it so hard when we sit down to talk after work and he is having a drink and I am not - part of me thinks 'why do I have to suffer and he doesn't?'. I know I need to change my mindset but I'm just not sure how......

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hey Vini! Yep, gotta change the mindset. We need to stop thinking of alcohol as a reward and realize that alcohol is causing the problem! I know the several times I've fallen off the wagon it was the voice in my head telling me, you've gone for 2 months without drinking, you deserve this! Or, it's a celebration, you deserve this! Or, you had a tough night, you deserve this! Always some rationalization about how I deserve to drink. But drinking was killing me. Causing health issues, causing me to embarrass myself in front of others, causing me to miss work, causing me to black out, causing me to fall, causing me to act like an arse to my husband, etc. Alcohol is not a reward, it's poison. And I don't deserve all of the bad things that happened to me because of alcohol.

You can still sit down with your husband and have a drink with him. Just drink your cranberry soda in your wineglass just like you're doing now. You can sit and talk with your husband and be more present than you've been in a long time. You will have more to offer to him and yourself. You can do it.

[shueaddict]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Jimmy Choos vs NZ Sauv blanc, round two

Juja, I am 35 and I still think I have a few more years of towering over people in heels.

As for Jimmy Choos ? I said I?d buy them on day 14 AF ? well, I went online yesterday ? the ones I liked on sales just sold out my number ( and then I had the beers) - 2 more weeks of AF days and I would save enough on AL to buy me a new pair ( yes, my New Zealand Sauv Blanc from Marlborough shipped to E Europe is an expensive habit).

What an awesome thought: I can buy designer shoes with what I saved on booze!!!!

Here?s another AL lie: I only drink good wine, therefore I cannot be an alcoholic. I swear after the 3rd glass it did not matter anymore.

And Enough !!! ? I?ve hit that cooking sherry way more times than I can remember ( literally !!!)

[shueaddict]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hi Vini,

My hubby also loves to unwind with 1 glass ... he can sip at that 1 glass for hours ... It felt so natural that I poured myself one too, sit down at dinner and chat ... Him not really finishing the wine, me, topping myself up over and over ... then hittig the second bottle in the second fridge ... preferring to to the dishes rather than read a story to our son so that I can sneak some more drinks . THIS was not NATURAL !!!

Read our posts, write down your low low moments; it helps. When I think I feel better I go and read my first post ever on WineSucks' "All I want is 30 days AF" and remember what it felt like.

It is certainly not easy but we're here for you and could totally relate.

[gingerspice]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

still not coping that well , but have kept it no more than three - but that is too much . My hubby has been great and is really worried about me and wants me to kick it completely.I know that this month we have a family gathering , (and my sister ,brother in law, sister in law and to an extent my brother, are all alcoholics ) I feel i may be getting back on the train , and im fighting against it. I must draw on all your strength and courage to get me through.

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

gingerspice;1152824 wrote: still not coping that well , but have kept it no more than three - but that is too much . My hubby has been great and is really worried about me and wants me to kick it completely.I know that this month we have a family gathering , (and my sister ,brother in law, sister in law and to an extent my brother, are all alcoholics ) I feel i may be getting back on the train , and im fighting against it. I must draw on all your strength and courage to get me through.

Gingerspice, I've read back on all of your posts and see that you've been drinking although moderately in all of them. Have you tried glutamine to help with the cravings? It's great that you have your husband's support. You should really find a way to get a day or two alcohol free. I can't imagine facing a family event without having a few AF days under your belt. Do you start the day feeling strong and get weaker as the day goes on or do you feel that you have no resolve all day? Do you have a "witching hour?" A times where the cravings start? What thoughts are going through your head when you decide to have your first drink? We are all here for you.

[Enough!]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Good morning!

Shue- your locomotive comment was very sweet and made me smile! Thank you. I never though I would be pulling anyone through (especially myself) I guess we surprise ourselves sometimes

Btw... Never quite made it to the cooking sherry, but I am sure the 1.5L on sale for $ 9.99 didn't taste much better . Keep on plugging through day 13.5!

Noxy... Awesome lucky day 13
Mya.. Wow 10
Mstall.. 2 great

Snap.. Sorry you slipped up, but you "snapped" right back ( corny I know )

Day 16 for me...

Hubby still doesn't get it! I was telling him today how proud I was of 16 and he said" how long do you count for"? " I understand if you have a couple of bottles of wine at the cottage as long as you don't fall down drunk". Arrrrrhhhhhh. With the cottage a week away I am nervious, but hopefully I can keep up my resolve.

Oh, another thing... My husband says you don't mind if I bring a bottle of Patron (tequila) to the cottage. Next to wine ( and vodka ) Patron is my favorite. So I look at him and say REALLY???? He at least agrees to forgo the Tequila ( gees what a sport )

Never a dull moment!

Talk soon...
Enough!

[shueaddict]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hey Ginger,

Try a few days AF then try an outing or two where you say NO to AL offered by other people. Saying no to drinks offered took all my willpower but once you've done it a few times it is amazing what else you can do. Practice makes perfect.

Family gatherings are particularly stressfull, arm yourself first.

[gingerspice]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

thanks flyaway , - i find it hard to consider using any things to help me with my cravings - maybe its because its not so easily used in the uk against addiction and according to the doctor i do not even reach the addiction level to need any help !! i must do some research.
thanks shue addict i am really going to need to arm myself and sort myself out

Thank you for your support xx

[Getting There]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Enough - Sounds like your husband is something like mine. Even though he sees my drinking as a problem sometimes he has not stopped. In fact, we have alcohol in the house right now. Beers in the refrigerator, and Patron and Crown Royal, and Rum in the liquor cabinet. At least no wine which is my weakness! When I first told him what I was doing he was very supportive but now he just acts kind of annoyed. Love him and all but he is not being very helpful right now. That is why I am so thankful that this forum exists! Congrats on Day 16! I am on day 5 and feeling good so far.

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

gingerspice;1152847 wrote: thanks flyaway , - i find it hard to consider using any things to help me with my cravings - maybe its because its not so easily used in the uk against addiction and according to the doctor i do not even reach the addiction level to need any help !! i must do some research.
thanks shue addict i am really going to need to arm myself and sort myself out

Thank you for your support xx

Ginger, you don't need a doctor to write you a script for glutamine. You can get it anywhere that you can buy supplements. And it's not just for alcohol cravings. It helps with sugar cravings too. There's nothing to lose by trying it and everything to gain.

[FlyAway]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Getting There;1152872 wrote: Enough - Sounds like your husband is something like mine. Even though he sees my drinking as a problem sometimes he has not stopped. In fact, we have alcohol in the house right now. Beers in the refrigerator, and Patron and Crown Royal, and Rum in the liquor cabinet. At least no wine which is my weakness! When I first told him what I was doing he was very supportive but now he just acts kind of annoyed. Love him and all but he is not being very helpful right now. That is why I am so thankful that this forum exists! Congrats on Day 16! I am on day 5 and feeling good so far.

Getting There--I haven't even bothered to tell my husband. He's supportive of everything I do, but we constantly have booze in the house. And in the past when he knows I'm not drinking he'll start to offer me drinks or bring me home a bottle of vodka or things like that. I think, are you worried that you might have a problem and therefore want to keep me drinking? I don't get it. I'm not sure if he's noticed that I'm not drinking, but I doubt if talking to him about it will make it any easier for me. If anything it might make it worse.

[Queenbug]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Hy Fly, Shue, Enough, Getting There, Vini and everyone else who I can't get back far enough to see...this is one of my favourite posts...along with 'All I want is 30 days..." and 'Buddhist Lent"...absolutely keeps me going.

Quick note to Snapdragon....we all know how rubbish it feels to slip back to Day 1...but I did the same recently, and like you, just felt I had to get back on it asap...and someone said to try to appreciate the break that you have given your body...and keep going. The support here is wonderful and people really care....stick with it....we are all holding you close :wave:
I'm enthusing at the moment about green tea and mint that one of my daughters has given me...seems to be stopping me from eating my body weight in carbs and sugar...tastes good too...
Hope everone has a good safe sober Tuesday x

[mumofsix]

Conquoring day 1!!! Who's beating this with me?

Enough!;1145150 wrote: After wasting the last 15 plus years gulping down bottle after bottle of wine. The bottles getting bigger and cheaper so I can talk myself into believing I don't have a problem. Guess what .... I am a Alcoholic! there I said it. Now I have the huge job of fixing it. Threw out the mostly empty 1.5 L left from yesterday. Big step.... Hid the corksrew and decanter and wine picture. I may be insane, but I believe can do this?

Now have to go shopping NOT buy wine and make it to day 2.
A little scared of day 2. Support welcomed.
Enough! :new:

Me too - today is my day one - I too am an alcoholic and not proud of it.