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    New to All This

    On day 3 A/F - not sure where this journey will take me but I can say that it is not easy. I LOVE wine - to the point of wanting it all the time and not being able to function socially without it. I am 42, successful career, great marriage, 2 great kids, in good shape. What I realized is that I am risking all this because I am addicted to alcohol. Starting to have regular blackouts and feeling very guilty and having major anxitey. I have tried to stop many times just to go back and drink more and more after abstaining. Now seeing a counselor, starting Baclofen, and trying very hard to beat this. MWO was a great read. Hope to find support and comfort here with people who are dealing with similar issues. Just know that right now the thought of never being able to have a glass of wine again makes me feel very uncomfortable even though I know it is the right thing......
    :new:

    #2
    New to All This

    Hi Getting There,

    Welcome to MWO, glad you found us

    I was addicted to wine myself, a lot of it!!!
    Congrats on your decision to quit now, before it gets worse. It always gets worse I'm afraid. You have a great start with 3 AF days - good for you! Try to keep your attention on today, then tomorrow & don't worry about the rest

    I'm here to tell you life goes on quite well without wine. I've been living happily nearly 2 1/2 years without it & I'm most grateful. No hangovers, no blackouts, no unexplained injuries, none of that!

    Be sure to read the MWO book if you haven't already. It can be downloaded right from the Health Store here. And make yourself a good, strong plan, don't leave anything to chance. Look in the https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html for some great ideas.

    Feel free to drop in the Newbies Nest thread for more support too
    Wishing you the best!

    Lav
    AF since 03/26/09
    NF since 05/19/09
    Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

    Comment


      #3
      New to All This

      Hi Getting There! Glad you found us. :welcome: I too had a successful career, but drinking was part of it. Things got really out of control for me in my early 40's as well. I love being FREE of the grip of AL!! "Forever" was not a workable idea for me either. One Day At a Time works a lot better in my world.

      I hope you read and post and find the support you are looking for here at My Way Out!

      DG
      Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
      Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


      One day at a time.

      Comment


        #4
        New to All This

        Hi Getting there,

        Another wine lover here. And like you had begun to feel very guilty and anxious that I was getting more and more dependent. Like you I tried in the past to stop and went back on only to find that eventually I ended up drinking more. As Lavande says it's one way traffic. You won't end up drinking less each time. That's not how dependency works.

        I think we can count ourselves graced that we have come to the realisation and with some honesty can say that we have a problem. (I am only on day 12 but this time I mean to stop!)
        You say:
        Just know that right now the thought of never being able to have a glass of wine again makes me feel very uncomfortable even though I know it is the right thing......
        I know that feeling too but remember you only have to take one day at a time. Forever is a very long time and all we have is today. That's all you have to worry about. Just getting through a day at a time and who knows where it will lead? It may be weeks, months, years or 'forever'.

        My philosophy is to be very grateful that I have found My Way out and this great support mechanism. I will do everything I can to stop drinking, but I won't beat myself up for failure either. Failure is only feedback from which I can learn what NOT to do next time.

        Good luck to you on your journey.
        AF since 11 July 2011
        You can never get enough of what you don't really want

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          #5
          New to All This

          Wishing you a warm welcome!
          Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

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            #6
            New to All This

            Just wanted to say Hi, GettingThere - I'm a wine addict myself and on Day 4 after a couple of attempts to stop. Not sure what it is about the wine that seems so addicting but I agree with everyone else here....it never gets better, it only gets worse over time. I have been through a couple of attempts, got all the way to 10 days started feeling good, had one glass that led to a bottle then had to start over again (I felt horrible, both physically and mentally).

            This is a great group on MWO and alot of people who have been through the same thing with some great advice. One of the best pieces of advice I got was a couple of days ago and it was to start a program. I'm also doing Women for Sobriety (thanks Doggy). It has helped me, along with posting on MWO.

            Best of luck to you......keep posting no matter what!

            Comment


              #7
              New to All This

              Thanks for the Welcome - Need some tips....

              Everyone - Thanks for the quick and warm welcome. It is really nice to know that people are out there and that perfect strangers can connect and care! I need some help - I have had this plan to stop drinking and have done so according to my plan. This last week I was on vacation when I stopped. Home, safe, and supported. On Monday I head back to work. I travel every week for work and the group that I travel with drinks - a lot! Every other time I have tried to stop they kid me about it and my boss even tries to coax me in to drinking. I have not admitted to them that I have a "problem" because I think that is private and not something that I trust to tell my boss. So, on Monday - Friday of next week while eating out with very nice wine being brought to the table at every meal do any of you have some tips or words of wisdom as to how I can handle this?

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                #8
                New to All This

                Getting there - I can see the scenarios in my head. I used to travel a LOT for business with the same type of stuff going on. Of course back in those days I was part of it.

                For myself, I'm not a big fan of un-truths in my sober life, but if I was in your situation with work, I think I might go for an un-truth. The one I think would be most workable for me would be "I'm on medication right now and cannot drink while taking it." That one is really hard to argue with - even for the most die hard "come drink with me" person.

                I have to get up early...
                I have a headache...

                All those are options too.

                My favorite now is "no thanks." and "I don't drink any more." But I certainly was not ready for that when I first got started on my sober life.

                Hope those ideas help...I know others will share more!

                Winesucks - I'm glad you are taking your program to a new level. Whatever happens, I'm sure you will gain some valuable information and experience.

                DG
                Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                One day at a time.

                Comment


                  #9
                  New to All This

                  Welcome to the group. I am not a newbie. I just forgot my password, so I have started out a new again.

                  You have come to the right place. Read and post was what the old timers on here told me to do. And yes, I did read and post while drinking at the first.

                  You can do this. I did it and my poison was rum and diet coke. It was years and years of me being strong without drinking to going back to drinking. I would say this one day wouldn't hurt me if I drank. WRONG!!!! It would cause days and days/months and months of drinking every day. I am surprised I didn't loose my job.

                  Anyway, I just wanted you to know that you can do this. I plan to get back to reading and posting to try to encourage others. If I can do it, you can. I wish you the very best!:h
                  AKA: April Moon
                  AF since September 24, 2009

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                    #10
                    New to All This

                    :welcome: day 3 is great keep up the good work!

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                      #11
                      New to All This

                      Doggygirl;1152000 wrote: Getting there - I can see the scenarios in my head. I used to travel a LOT for business with the same type of stuff going on. Of course back in those days I was part of it.

                      For myself, I'm not a big fan of un-truths in my sober life, but if I was in your situation with work, I think I might go for an un-truth. The one I think would be most workable for me would be "I'm on medication right now and cannot drink while taking it."
                      That one is really hard to argue with - even for the most die hard "come drink with me" person.

                      I have to get up early...
                      I have a headache...

                      All those are options too.

                      My favorite now is "no thanks." and "I don't drink any more." But I certainly was not ready for that when I first got started on my sober life.

                      Hope those ideas help...I know others will share more!

                      Winesucks - I'm glad you are taking your program to a new level. Whatever happens, I'm sure you will gain some valuable information and experience.

                      DG
                      Well if you're taking Baclofen, it's really not a lie is it? :H Be prepared for people asking you what's wrong and what medication you're on. Welcome to MWO!

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                        #12
                        New to All This

                        Welcome to MWO...its a lifeline xx
                        ...peace and quiet....and a cup of tea.....heaven:h

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                          #13
                          New to All This

                          Hi there, Getting There.. :welcome: You are in the right place .. I to , am relatively new here.. day 13 .. all I can say is stay without the daily feedback I could not have made it!! GOOD people here and a lot of wisdom ... Good Luck :l

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                            #14
                            New to All This

                            Craving like CRAZY

                            On day 11 - have been doing just fine with managable cravings but today is a real challenge. For some reason all of the sudden I am really craving a glass of wine. I have not taken the first drink as I know it will lead to the bottle or more but I am having a really hard time. I can't seem to stop thinking about it. I have tried to do some things to take my mind off it but it is not working. Give me strength!:damn:

                            Comment


                              #15
                              New to All This

                              Well done on Day 3! I've been struggling the red wine for years...just managed 2 whole goes at 10 days...caving both times on Day 10...but instead of running and hiding I've stayed close to these boards this time and kept going....I agree that once you start this, you learn so much and have such good support...it helps. Even if (goddam it!) you falter a bit, don't feel guilty and bad, just get right back to it....
                              I'd definately go with the 'I'm on medication' response...shuts 'em up a bit...
                              Also, if you get in a panic...find a loo and hide till it passess....and put out a shout on here...there is usually someone about to remind you of how strong you are and why this is a good decision that you have made...
                              Good luck x
                              ...peace and quiet....and a cup of tea.....heaven:h

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